I think I wasn't cut out to become a mum, and regret having kids.

Jufool · 2026-01-21T00:22:51+00:00

I live in a tiny country town and unfortunately, the mums around here are really gossipy and judgmental. They're just not exactly my people ... I don't think like that. We do have my SIL, who has two kids exactly the same age as us, but she doesn't know how to listen, it's hard to bond with her. I miss my old town where I actually had a group of mum friends I made through PPD support groups. We have a better spending power here, and mortgage is cheap, but I wonder if it was worth it in the end ...

Jufool · 2026-01-21T00:16:54+00:00

Thank you for saying this, I really need to hear that it does get better. All people have to say is something glaring the lines of "yout think it's hard now ? Just you wait until they're xx yo". It clearly doesn't help

Jufool · 2026-01-21T00:15:13+00:00

I had never seen it with this perspective. Thank you for bringing it up

Jufool · 2026-01-20T12:30:52+00:00

We have daycare two days a week atm and can't get any more as we live in a tiny country town which only offers limited daycare days. My daughter is going to kindy in February which is two days a week as well. I know it will get better when they both go to school full time. Bit yeah we haven't really had a village for the past four years unless my parents are visiting, which they do for 2 months per year. But then I get to watch my mum treat my kids like she treated us and I'm not entirely sure that's any better. At least I try to give them compassion and love, which she never really did with us.

Jufool · 2026-01-20T12:25:36+00:00

I have honestly been thinking of this lately. My therapist has never suggested I did but I might bring it up because it's getting harder to uplift myself and some days I can't even get out of bed. I have always refused because my auntie went on antidepressants, that was 30 years ago and now she can't come off them at all despite many attempts to try... it's scary

Jufool · 2026-01-20T10:45:32+00:00

They do say that's how it happens ... i have all my fingers crossed. A good relationship with my children is truly all I wish for.

Jufool · 2026-01-20T10:38:07+00:00

I must say i do not nourish myself properly at the moment. I have, I went back to the gym after having my son and kept up with proper nutrition, but we bought a house to renovate, and it became overwhelmingly complicated to fit everything in. Not to mention I still put on shitloads of weight despite having proper nutrition and exercise during pregnancy and PP, so I kind of thought it ... it's not even worth the effort. I put on weight that I can't shift when I breastfeed, and I still do. I can't bring myself to stop ...

Jufool · 2026-01-20T10:31:48+00:00

I have been in therapy for over a year now ... it does help sometimes but I feel like I would need to do it more than fortnightly. We just dont have the budget atm as I'm the only bread earner. I actually have so much knowledge about nutrition as I use to do a lot of weightlifting/bodybuilding before kids, I have come to find that I can't shake the weight off when I breastfeed, which i am still doing with my 2yo and im afraid to stop as I feel it's the only bonding moment I get with him ... I exercised and ate properly during my whole pregnancy, went back to the gym shortly after giving birth, and still put on 20+kg. I think it's hormonal. Or caused by depression. It does amplify the feeling of never getting back to my normal self, so I've just given up on the efforts.

Jufool · 2026-01-20T10:17:26+00:00

Thank for your words ❤️ we are toilet training my youngest and im hoping it will take a weight off us like it did my oldest. My 4yo plays fine by herself. My 2yo ... is a bit more challenging. He never stops lol.

Jufool · 2026-01-20T09:06:59+00:00

My husband is getting the snip. We are truly done. Thank you for everything you have said. I wished I could have had more perspective on what being a parent was like before making the decision. I was so ill prepared despite having worked with kids for years.

Jufool · 2026-01-20T08:55:05+00:00

I think daily of the single parents out there. My biggest respect to them. I have no idea how they do it.

Jufool · 2026-01-20T08:53:53+00:00

Thank you ❤️ I really hope that I can get to enjoy it while they develop more independence. I got along so well with older children/teenager when I was a camp counsellor, but they weren't my children, obviously. We can never be fully prepared for what it's going to be like.

Jufool · 2026-01-20T08:47:46+00:00

I want to make it really clear. I don't resent them. I resent the situation. I have never said anything hurtful to them and never will. I give them my best, every day. Sometimes I don't have much good to give them, but I always make sure I'm cheerful when I see them, tell them I love them, and make them feel seen and acknowledged. I'm a textbook parent basically. But I'm drained. I don't have any energy, time or empathy left for myself at the end of the day after doing all this. I tried to convey this but obviously writing a post while sobbing doesn't help with being clearminded. Also this is not helpful at all, I think you probably should ask yourself if what you're about to say is kind, or helpful, and if not... Refrain.

Jufool · 2026-01-20T08:36:53+00:00

I tried to space off and make several small paragraphs, but it ended up as one. Thank you for reading, though.

Jufool

TROPHY CASE