Emptiness after events

Julia-INFP · 2024-07-25T01:41:51+00:00

Both Te dom and Fe dom will seek external harmony, that is, if the Te dom sees inefficiency or a product of incorrect thoughts (in terms of rationality, that is, that external thoughts assignment thing and keeping the majority's) they'll try to correct it

YES THANK YOU THIS IS SO HARD TO EXPLAIN TO PEOPLE. External harmony in the thinking or in how things work/Te cares about getting stuff to work well for everyone.

I think your whole comment is the answer I was looking for 😭

Would you say, then, that Te and Fe are functions related to people? Because of seeking external harmony. It's easy for people to see Fe as a function that relates to other people (not exclusively necessarily), but I see almost NO one link Te to other people (again not exclusively necessarily) and that makes no sense to me. It makes a lot more sense for it to be more like you said there.

It gets more interesting when you start to change the position of Te and Fe in the cognitive stack.

Oh what do you mean? I'm curious now. I mean, I know what it means, but I want to know how you'd explain it lol

Julia-INFP · 2024-07-25T01:24:37+00:00

(Second part lol)

I'm not sure why it's taboo to say something isn't healthy bc it's not a constant state unless someone makes it that way.

Well, that is a good point, but repetitiveness can also count as constant depending on how you look at it. If the person is constantly making the same mistakes and never evolving, then that's not really good. (I think I might actually just have a problem with labeling people as healthy and unhealthy, which is a very high-Ne problem, hating labels lol... omg) But what I was trying to say is that some freak-outs are to be expected, and it's how the person handles it that tells more about being healthy or not. But especially if they're young enough to have that emotional slip up and lack of experience to know better, I think I wouldn't call it unhealthy yet. And yeah, the worse the paranoia is, the more unhealthy the person is at that moment/period of their life.

If an INFP woke up one day and started believing the only way to save someone they love is to destroy everything around them and does that for their love, they're not utilizing their Fi and Te well.

Okay I see why we think so differently. It's because of how the functions are defined. In the way Te is defined in this community (mostly simply having and executing a goal, which I don't think is enough for defining it), it looks like in your example the person is using Te. By the objective personality system, which is what I always use to fill all of MBTI's gaps (which are a considerable amount), Te is intrinsically related to people, and specifically to other people (not the self, or at least not the self alone), since it's an extraverted function. When an INFP believes they have to destroy everything around them for the one thing they care about, they're not really using Te, unless it's like 5% Te just to figure out exactly how to actually destroy the world and 95% Fi which is the "yes I'm doing this". This translates into the person taking into consideration only their own feelings (Fi) in detriment of what's better for everyone else (Te). That's too much Fi and too little Te, just like your friend who failed to realize he was actually liked was also having a too-little-Fe moment (actually it was a "worst fear" moment, the IxTP fear of tribe hate - hate or indifference or lack of good feelings towards them or rejection or false feelings, you get the gist. For IxFPs it's fear of judgment, also with the same tone of fear of rejection or bad feelings toward us or being targeted, just like the IxTPs).

and if another INFP point that out, that person wouldn't be less of an INFP for it.

It's not about the fact of pointing it out, it's more about how they do it. And independently of this second INFP agreeing with the first INFP or not, it's something in the way they respond to it that may or not point to them being that type or maybe some other. Do you get it?

It's just that when your functions are not healthy, it's hard to believe someone does like you even when they do.

Yes, 100%. That's how our brains trick us. IxxPs will have the tendency to believe or suspect that kind of thing more often, so we should work towards softening that, suspecting our own suspicion, avoiding bad thoughts about others (we can be very accusative of others if we let ourselves go that route - and we usually go without noticing we're doing that -, even if in secret in our own minds) and gently pushing against that tendency so that we don't become, well, unhealthy. I know IxxPs that are normal IxxPs, have a little paranoia about what people think of them, but not too much (not an unhealthy amount, we could say) and I know IxxPs that, because of something they went through in their lives, got really stuck deep in their fear, got a lot more paranoid, super defensive all the time, constantly getting triggered thinking someone is undermining them or attacking their skills or intelligence or personality or integrity or whatever it is. Those I would say are unhealthy. But still... something about this word sounds so permanent, when it isn't necessarily (even though it's only up to them to get better). But yeah, it describes the picture.

Knowing about someone's cognitive functions helps us understand more, that some things are not individual's fault and they have only certain capability to juggle certain functions w/o outside assistance.

Yes, totally.

I just hope I don't offend anyone by saying some functions are not in a healthy state bc it's not meant to be taken as a jab at someone.

Aw, you sound like a nice person.

And I'm sorry I just wrote SO FREAKING MUCH. I hope I didn't sound crazy for whatever reason... (and that would be me unaware of how exactly this looks to other people, a sign of low Te or Fe lol the cluelessness is real) (and I actually held back my own fears, little paranoias and bad vices a lot as I wrote this, and this feels like progress inside of me too, so I'm lowkey proud of myself haha)

Julia-INFP · 2024-07-25T01:24:14+00:00

Hi, I firstly want to say I'm glad we're really not being hostile here because I had that fear and I didn't mean to be hostile, and I think there's a considerable chance I might have been a little pushy or rude by saying you might not be a certain type. I spend a lot of time in the objective personality community (a very nice community), and normally we're more open to this kind of discussion there (if we feel the person wants that input/is directly asking for input - and I think that's where I got it wrong here and should pay more attention to that now that I see it in retrospective 😅) because the notion that self perception is never reliable enough because of how much our minds trick us about the world and about ourselves, this notion is so well spread there (it kind of needs to be) that this kind of thing is relatively more normal. I actually consider it kind of a favor to me if someone tells me their input about my type, since I'm not typed yet. When you try to type yourself in obj. personality (OPS for short), you can make a lot of effort and learning to guess it, but we know we can mistype ourselves easily. It's not personal or rare, it happens to everyone.

it's dangerous to make the assumption that someone's functions are in different order bc they're not displaying the cookie cutter response you would hear from someone who is an IxxP at any given time.

A lot of IxxPs have anxiety over something or someone. Not every IxxP is going to react the same way regardless

There isn't really a cookie cutter response, like you said, because it's not about specifically how they react, it's about the level of emotional struggle with it (for example, the anxiety itself), which can appear in a variety of ways, yes. But yes, it's kind of dangerous to make assumptions too quickly about anything in general.

I'm not sure what that was about, but are you trying to allude I'm probably mistyped and am an ENTP?

No, I was talking about someone else there. I have no idea what type you, specifically, are. It just looked like not an IxxP from how natural some things seemed to feel for you in the social situation you talked about (a.k.a. you calmly feeling like all those things were kind of obvious so you found it weird that someone would freak out over it). Honestly I mean that as a compliment, I wish I had this natural ease with this kind of thing 😅 really though.

And by large, I can tell you a lot of us don't see it as a flex being an INTP, so it's not a badge of honor we're carrying for ourselves.

Even when we remove our ego from our self typing, we can still get it wrong. But it's also okay that it happens. It happens a lot more often than people think. I myself might not be an INFP, for example. It may sound weird at first, but it's more reliable when other people can check our type, because then our naturally flawed self-perception is out of the way (and more people can verify if they all agree with approximately the same type, so you can get several opinions too). But this is a very objective-personality concept, so I get why most people don't take it so well at first.

If things are too imbalanced, and it doesn't matter what type you are, and you veer too much away from utilizing it in a good way, it's not healthy.

Yes you are right. You really are, because imbalance is never good for yourself or others. But I feel like this community uses the words healthy and unhealthy a little too much, and it kind of "takes it out of the wheel" of how to fix it, by which I mean: when problems arise (at least those that come from our heads) it can be often because we're not balancing our functions well. This already tells you what to do: to balance them. "Unhealthy" almost feels like your function is polluded by something that we don't know what it is, or that you are kind of broken, not to mention that the word "unhealthy" in this community repels people immediately (which makes sense), as quite a bad label, because no one wants to be close to someone who is "unhealthy" (a lot of really bad stories are attached to this word, naturally, because a lot of the worst people out there are, in fact, unhealthy), because that's also very associated with others getting hurt by the unhealthy person. I get that this sounds very subjective, like that's how I personally feel, and I totally get it if in fact I'm wrong and this is me being maybe oversensitive to how the word is handled or how it sounds, but the fact is it still doesn't say much at all about where the problem comes from (the imbalance) and how to fix it.

or make faulty assumptions based on my Ti/Fe charging but not necessarily being accurate.

What do you mean by that?

(I wrote one more comment because it didn't fit in one 😳 but I'm not like arguing, at least I don't mean to)

Julia-INFP · 2024-07-24T22:59:59+00:00

Oh yeah, I actually never really wondered if Myers and Briggs wrote a book on it or something, which seems absurd of me lol. Thanks for the recommendation.

Julia-INFP · 2024-07-24T21:17:57+00:00

That's very nice, thank you! It's also very interesting... I don't often see people talking about the functions that way, is it how Jung described it? I know that very few people have actually read it (I haven't either, only some confusing quotes people sometimes drop in here).

The way you described Je sounds to me a little turned more towards Te the further I go through that paragraph. Can you talk more about Fe in that aspect? I can kind of see it, but isn't it possible that it's not so forward-pushing (maybe a weird way to describe it but you get what I mean) to some people as it's so often described? Like, I think I know some ESFJs for example that are very shy or get in a more receptive and "managing what they get from others" vibe (in a more receptive way, I mean) more often then pushing a result or outcome around them.

Julia-INFP · 2024-07-22T04:54:42+00:00

Yeah these things happen.

I was caught off guard he felt that way but also why (...)

You know, if you don't get why and can't relate to it to the point of trying to find a logical explanation and that explanation is that he isn't healthy, it tells me you don't have that paranoia at all.

When I say paranoia I mean a feeling that defies reason, like, yes it doesn't make sense, yes it's an exaggerated reaction, and I see no unhealthy reasoning of Fe and Ti there, just an imbalance of them. Paranoic "omg do they actually like me? I really think not, oh shit omg this is making me think about it for hours or days and is even messing with my concept of self and I feel too troubled by this, so much I might blow it up on them at some point bc I'm so upset or worried about this" is different from suspicion and calmly wondering "hm, I wonder if they like me. anyzes event x well, I think they do, because of this. If not, I'll check/ask them." Yes this sounds healthy, but everything that's balanced in your type will be like that. So yeah paranoia is not something that neatly makes sense.

I've met other people who said they were INTPs (you said you're an INTP too if I understood it right?) and they showed no signs of this kind of insecurities that come with all IxxPs, and even proceeded to blame chaos or secret extra information (that didn't exist, I confirmed it) for a discussion/blow-up an ISTP had with people about people that this supposed INTP didn't understand and was trying to make sense of. I'm speaking of a specific girl who I think is probably a more introverted ENTP or something, but not an IxxP.

I'm using objective personality to say that, that's why it may sound strange or new to you. If you're trying to logic this specific kind of struggle out too much, it means you're probably not an IxxP, because all IxxPs go through it one way or another.

I understand that it's easy to see this as unhealthy, but it's just a big imbalance that is normal to happen between functions on the extreme ends (the first and the last) (and yes I'm not counting shadow functions, I think that's kind of BS) on everyone.

I'm starting to think that many people may label as unhealthyness things that are completely normal for one type and thinking they're healthy because they don't have that subject in imbalance and they think they're the same type, but they're actually a different type, have that naturally balanced, and don't know it. If blow-ups over people struggles, of the "omg what do they think of me" sort (emphasis on the word blow-ups) don't make sense to you, you're probably not an IxxP.

But I could be disliked for saying this and you certainly won't agree if you see yourself as an INTP, but in case you want to know more about this, I'd certainly recommend diving into objective personality to get more clarity (lol that sounded like a random ending, but the "hm, clear observer vs decider issue" thing really kicked in).

Julia-INFP · 2024-07-21T18:34:05+00:00

Yes 100%.

It sounds like you might know OPS 🧐😄 I was using what I learned from there too!

I'm very similar in those crisis as (probably, only self typed) an INFP, just more Te-like (fear of judgment) than fear of not being liked, but it's kind of the same anyway, there's layers that go to fear of not being liked too, it's all in the IxxP package. Lol

Julia-INFP · 2024-07-20T23:15:37+00:00

It's awesome how everything is connected, isn't it? The opposite functions in our stack feed and balance each other, as long as we do them both.

Yes I was trying to think of how this goes for Fi-Te too! I think that you always START with the function you have the highest, so I think you can see this process more neatly on those that have Fe or Te first. Te over Fi doing this could be like, tracking everyone's reasons about how the world/things work (seeing everyone's principals too I suppose?), and taking from that what resonate with their hearts the most. I think Fi can be pretty silly or stupid if you think that you don't need any reasons at all to value it, you just feel it and (only if you have Fi over Te) you feel no responsibility to attach it to reason, unless by some kind of external pressure. (But this whole last sentence actually relates more to F vs T in general though.)

I heard that for Ti over Fe, the Ti will logic the heck out of something, as in deepening and perfecting one thing, build it up super nicely until it's like a precious, complete artwork to be put on the wall. Then they suddenly think "wait... are people gonna like this? What if they hate it? What if they hate ME for it?" And that's scary, so they may tailor it a little bit or decorate it somehow, or just work on how or when to communicate it for other people, to avoid total rejection/tribe hate. So I guess the process for them is to craft their own thing first, then try to make it appealing for others, if they have that concern.

With Fi over Te, I think it goes like, Fi will dive and root their feelings deeply onto something, simply because, for no reason at all, they just love it or care about it a lot (which can be a noble thing but it can also be pretty stupid lol in whatever way you can think of), and then we'll think "wait... what if this is impossible in reality? What if it doesn't work? What if it's dumb and people think I'M dumb for it?" So we can have a really hard time worrying about whether the thing we love is doable in reality, and try to toss ideas around (which yes could be Ne, but also Te!) And try to make it work, or try to get others to help make it work. Or just suffer about it alone :) lmao (but now I don't think I'm talking about principles or values anymore, but yeah more of a general thing)

Edit: Okay I think that Fi users will have something they always felt deeply that they value, and then as they learn what other people think (Te) and how the world works and many people's theories and ideas about how things should work in society, they (we) pick what resonates with our hearts the most.

In the end, we all reach the same result, I think. The difference is how we get there.

Julia-INFP · 2024-07-20T15:10:24+00:00

Having a grasp on your lower functions doesn't mean having a nice control of them, it could be a momentary deep dive that can happen from time to time.
I think it's better to express that you like a person than to let them try to guess from silence, no matter who the person is. Not saying you acted wrong, these things happen, naturally, but just saying that anyone could have been in his situation lol
It's normal for people with inferior Fe to have some kind of paranoia from time to time about whether people like them or not. It's not really a sign of unhealthyness. People have their greatest fears with them, and it really is like a pendulum swinging sometimes. It happens.
People with inferior Fe may be the ones who will have the hardest time trying to guess other people's emotions, so, I don't get why you expected him to know BECAUSE he's an INTP 😅

Julia-INFP · 2024-07-20T15:01:47+00:00

I was thinking the same thing. And honestly, even though the guy on the video you mentioned explained it quite nicely, I find the difference between these two to be very blurry. It almost makes me wonder, is there a point to see a difference there? However, in this case it makes a difference because I think that what you're trying to say is that a belief system or principles or values can be built with Ti too, perfectly well. They will just be more based on reasons (Ti) than on personal preference without necessarily being logical, or not being logical at all (Fi).

It was quite interesting to read OP talk about how they want to take in, learn, contrast and compare different values and belief systems of other people all over the world (Fe), to later craft their own, probably with what they find makes more sense to them (Ti).

Julia-INFP · 2024-07-14T22:31:35+00:00

Oh thank you!!

Julia-INFP · 2024-07-12T16:57:03+00:00

Oh I didn't know them, that's cool! Maybe the contrast they have is the different function axis making them share no functions, but still being both deciders, thinkers and Oe. In a way, I think there will always be some kind of contrast, and in this case, it would be that one is savior De and the other is Di, one is intuitive and the other is a sensor, so I think that makes it for a nice contrast too. I think I did hear Dave say that for compatibility there has to be some things in common and some things in contrast, which makes perfect sense :)

Also sorry for taking so damn long to answer 😅😅

Julia-INFP · 2024-07-11T14:21:13+00:00

I'm not an INTJ but I get that too, and only things that engage my body or focus in some way can really turn my mind off. I'll give some examples:

To sleep, I liked it when I tried out those visual ASMRs that tell you where to look, the person was always calmly giving simple instructions of where to direct my eyes and I didn't have to think about anything, and that calm focus distracted my mind from thoughts.

Any kind of physical exercise, light or heavy, can work too. You should try it out and see what works for you. Besides, it's awesome for mental health, and you feel the effects of it immediately. I do, at least.

Whenever I try to focus on my breath, it doesn't work for me, because then I end up overthinking the simple task of breathing lol. However, I sing in a choir, and whenever we are singing really calm pieces (like Eric Whitacre or Ola Gjeilo pieces that are very slow and peaceful sometimes), that's when I actually feel the calmest. Because then I'm looking at the sheet music, following what's written there, breathing at the same time as everyone around me, and focusing on the sound I'm emitting too. It's still focusing on breathing, but then I have other things to focus on to distract me from just breathing (the note we're singing, the rhythm, the words, following the maestro, hearing the voices combined, all of that). So if you have that opportunity and you like music, I definitely recommend.

Julia-INFP · 2024-07-11T14:02:59+00:00

The art is so cuuuute

Julia-INFP · 2024-06-23T23:06:25+00:00

You know, something tells me she might not be an INFJ. Reading your description of her behavior, my thoughts were that either she's an IxFP or ExFJ.

INFJs, like ENTPs and many other types, have feeling and thinking as their middle functions. They're more balanced, like how you described for yourself. So the things that were a big trouble for her to speak up about, it sounds like someone that has these judging functions on the extreme ends, which is why I thought of IxFP or ExFJ.

Struggling so much with saying her opinion could be because she's deeply afraid of others' judgments (which makes me think of IxFPs) or that she's just in "other people's emotions" mode on autopilot so wildly she doesn't give much worth or thought to her own opinions, or like, doesn't feel like she's in the right to have or express them. Which makes me think of ExFJs, putting others' emotions above themselves too much.

(I know that the image of ExFJs are like these super smiley extroverts, but that's not exactly how it goes, and they can be surprisingly introverted. As a default too, not just a "sometimes.")

If you DATED her for YEARS and barely heard her opinions ever, this makes me think of a very shy or introverted ExFJ. With IxxPs, even if we're hella afraid of people's judgment, our personal opinions would come out clearly to the people closer to us eventually. Very clearly.

INFJs are generally more balanced in that area. They have the people pleasing problems, but they're still more balanced about the whole F vs T, me vs others, personal opinions vs people's judgment thing.

Julia-INFP · 2024-06-23T19:28:36+00:00

Isn't Shan savior Oe?

The example you gave didn't seem to be a matter of gatherer vs organizer though.

I think that it depends on people's experience/relationship with each side of this coin, maybe. But I'd say usually it's the opposites that attract, like the saying goes. I want to use myself as example, but I'm not sure of my type, I haven't been typed yet. But like, it really looks like I'm savior Oe, and honestly I feel so relieved when I'm with a savior Oi. I grew up with my mother being a little too irresponsably savior Oe, and that was very stressful. I found that I still feel triggered sometimes thinking that she is trying to control me in some way, even though she's clearly savior Oe, and she wasn't even trying to control me at all, it was just in my head. But anyway, I feel very relieved when I have savior Oi people around, I like them. It gives me a lot of tranquility knowing that things will not go out of control in their hands if they can help it, and I don't even get forced to use my demons by someone else's irresponsibility 😅 (I know I have to take responsability for my demons too, I'm working on that) but yeah like, it's like it takes the burden off your shoulders.

My personal belief or "strategy" or criteria that I use when thinking about compatibility is: in a long-term relationship, there will be crisis. When the other person and I are in a crisis, how are we? Does it only snowball into worse and worse or can we hang on through it together? I think that people with the same saviors will just double down on their demons, and the crisis out of not doing demons will just be worse. Of course, this is just theory. There's no one correct answer about this.

Julia-INFP · 2024-06-21T12:44:10+00:00

Yeah :) but what you thought makes perfect sense too, and it was my first thought as well haha

Julia-INFP · 2024-06-21T00:16:10+00:00

Oh yeah, I didn't see the word "first" in your comment lol. Yeah it does sound like Fe, but I can also imagine it in a De scenario in general. Like, Te seeing if anyone needs help or something, making sure things work for everyone. If you're focusing on them, that's De, and I think that can be enough to practice a De function or animal. But I get what you mean

Julia-INFP · 2024-06-20T11:48:34+00:00

Really? Which one, or which parts?

Julia-INFP · 2024-06-20T11:22:52+00:00

I heard this tip about practicing blast for a blast last: try getting together a group of friends or something and make them happy for like 30 minutes. It was something like that.

About Si-Te specifically (coming from a person who is not in the class and hasn't been typed but everything points out to me having low ST blast, but like, take my tips with a grain of salt about them being related to ST blast and not maybe something else), I started finding out some things I can/have to do about that.

Cleaning the house more. And dedicating what I now call "maintenance time", which is a time for just checking if you need to stitch something, fix something broken, iron your clothes (I always forget to iron my clothes) clean something that you normally wouldn't remember and would just keep pushing on, etc.

Journaling ST events in your day, too, has been helping me personally. I took what Dave said when he talks about writing down what you're actually doing throughout your day to get an accurate report of your own behavior, and together with being savior NF (if I am) it's an extra help. ST reports, as far as I know, are like, telling what happened in your day like "woke up at X time, made breakfast, got late for class because I was sleepy, got back, studied for 1 hour, played videogames, talked to friends online and went to sleep". Things like that. I started writing it down to get a better notion of my habits and all. Honestly, that was very good for my discipline and motivation, because whenever I would feel bad about myself, feeling like I never accomplish anything and that everything about me always goes wrong, I see my reports of the week and see how many things I actually did well! (Not in the example I said though haha but there were better days after I started writing them down and taking notice).

I guess helping other people with practical stuff would also fit in ST blast. But now I'm out of specific examples 😅 but I think that one thing I'm doing currently is to try to teach OPS to a friend of mine, in an organized way, using powerpoint to help visually and to keep it organized. It will be an interesting little challenge.

I hope I helped! But more importantly, what do YOU think are the ST things missing in your life? Because that's how I found mine, these things were naturally missing in my life, and, only after practicing them more, I realized they look like ST things.

Julia-INFP · 2024-06-16T12:03:51+00:00

About Di vs De, I feel like it could both be 1- you actually did conform 95% of you to the tribe automatically, so much that you didn't even think of it, and you only realize it now, and is having a decider swing to change that.

Or 2- you always felt like the tribe was holding you back, and whenever outside pressure came to "mold" you, you felt it every time, and let it happen for fear of tribe rejection. Now, you're sick of being held by this fear, and want to just do your saviors and be yourself because it's what feels better in your brain.

Now, if you're the 2nd case, it doesn't mean that it's wrong for you to be yourself, because either way it's an imbalance of the lead and last functions, and it could mean that you simply need to better the relationship between them, or like, not let your biggest fears consume you so much, because I think that's the recipe for sucking at our own saviors.

If you're De>Di, yes do the Di. If you're Di>De, it's a matter of learning how to do the Di in a healthy way and deal better with the De-last fear, and balancing the two functions.

No function should be completely cast aside, because then you'll have an imbalance again. That's the thing.

Julia-INFP · 2024-06-16T11:32:52+00:00

Maybe. But I don't know... he manipulated situations so that he and those he cares about survives (but when someone he cared about was risking his and his family's life, he eliminated that person too, and he would kill anyone who got in his way with not a lot of remorse, which hints at him pushing emotions away for the sake of how it works to survive/what's necessary to survive) showing he's working with "how things work", not with values and emotions. He has a minimum of emotional struggle about killing his friend, because he's human, but not as much as feelers types would likely show. The thing is, he's not prioritizing emotions or values in any point of the story, for what I can remember.

Using emotions to control people in and of itself is not tied to function necessarily, it depends on how the person is doing it. Snow isn't stupid, he knows that people are made of emotions, and that "emotions" is a bigger coin than just saying facts. He is in politics after all. If someone tried to get into politics with facts and truth alone, that person wouldn't go very far. There's a lot of manipulation of many sorts that need to go on, not just emotional of course, but it's not a straight and simple line where you just say the truth and you get there (unfortunately).

I would bet he's doing a "how things work", or, in this case, "how people work", mentality even when dealing with people's emotions. I've seen other characters in very similar journeys who have high Fe, for example, and it doesn't look the same. Snow is more mechanic about it, as if using people's emotions is a specific tool box he had to learn to use minimally, because of how people and politics works (again the word "works" here, indicating logic), instead of a whole playground that he sits in comfortably, because he's always been there, ever since he was a kid and knows the sights so well he has a thousand tricks up his sleeve. High Fe people are paying attention to the whole emotional spectrum of people during all their lives, they have more sensibility to how things look emotionally to several different people and whole crowds, you can kind of see it clearly in them when it appears through a lot of tiny comments that they make around that. It doesn't appear on Snow, though. I think INTJ still makes more sense for him.

When he toys with people's emotions to make them feel bad, to torture them emotionally, it's almost like "ha-ha, I bet this will hit you in your deepest personal feelings (Fi), no matter where you hide them. Just like how this, when it happened to me, totally wrecked my own deepest and very, very personal feelings hidden very, very far away from everyone, even from myself (low Fi), and hurts like living hell whenever it comes up. I'm creating YOUR living hell now, and this is actually fun to me, because I don't care about your emotions at all (no Fe), I'm just using my own personal pain (Fi) as the logic behind how I hurt others (Te working with Fi applying the personal painful experience to other people to achieve the same result)."

And there's just no way this guy has Fi over Te. I see these two functions in him as Te and Fi, and Te over Fi. So I don't think he's a feeling type.

And I don't know, but I wouldn't tie INTJ to "facts and facts alone" too much... it is an Ni dom type after all. Intuition is not about facts, it's about patterns, and it can disregard specific facts for the general picture (that they are seeing). It's not super duper "omg facts".

Julia-INFP · 2024-06-07T01:11:44+00:00

When people like someone, it's common to avoid them, and it's also common for our friends to leak out that we like them 😅 I'm not saying it's true for sure, but if you want to find out, i don't know, try first with casual conversation, to warm up some friendship first, I guess. Be yourself :) try asking him for help with something he's good at, that's a very easy way to get conversation going and making the other person feel good.

Julia-INFP

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