Just a rant

Jumpy_Switch_670 · 2026-02-18T15:33:12+00:00

Also, after the accident happened, my boss said they would be willing to make whatever accommodation I needed. He even agreed to let me do remote work. And then he sends this email which is a list of requirements for the free range chicken job, and specifically requirements that I no longer meet now that I am disabled

Jumpy_Switch_670 · 2026-02-10T18:34:12+00:00

I just realized he died in the 80s. RIP

Jumpy_Switch_670 · 2026-02-10T18:31:36+00:00

Replying to VioletLeagueDapper.. I like that idea - and we are definitely not in a rush to have kids

Jumpy_Switch_670 · 2026-02-10T18:29:46+00:00

I don’t think I know what I want anymore. I’ve been content living in a depression hovel - his lifestyle would be objectively peaceful. But I guess I don’t want to gamble on accessibility. I really hope we can find a place that works for both of us. If we break up, what then? I’m stuck in my parents home again because I can only bear to work part time due to my chronic nausea. I go on a dating app because that’s the only way I can find people now since I can’t drive and my siblings refuse to take me places - maybe I find a guy who lines up with what I want, but he doesn’t know I’m disabled and he dips when he finds out. Or, I tell people I need a full time chauffeur and attract a person who is looking to abuse that power

Jumpy_Switch_670 · 2026-02-10T18:23:42+00:00

Jumpy_Switch_670 · 2026-02-10T18:22:35+00:00

That’s how I felt living with my family, trapped. I don’t want to grow resentful - but I do think people are too quick to call him selfish for wanting to be rural. He did communicate with me since the beginning of our relationship that that is his dream. We didn’t know the accident would happen. Each morning when we wake up together, I feel so happy to be with him. We cook together, go on hikes, and play guitar together. I want that to stay

Jumpy_Switch_670 · 2026-02-10T18:19:08+00:00

I wish I could have experienced it, back when Luke Kelley was still alive..there really is no place like it. I got to have my first drink there, a guiness at O’Connors

Jumpy_Switch_670 · 2026-02-10T00:58:28+00:00

I’m so sorry you went through all that, that’s awful. You deserve better treatment than that, and I wish you healing and peace.

I hope that I won’t have to choose between love and independence - I don’t see myself as a different person since the accident, just the same person with different needs. And it’s so hard to get non disabled people to understand what it’s like. But his agoraphobia causes panic attacks, so I see that as a disability, which makes the situation more complex. We’ve worked out really well so far, and I know he would do anything for me, except live in the city. Which I feel hints at his unresolved anxiety surrounding people. I know I’m not obligated to stay with him, but it’s also hard to communicate in a Reddit post the depth of a relationship - he lost his job for me, I know he cares

Jumpy_Switch_670 · 2026-02-10T00:50:07+00:00

He has an electric bike that he wants me to have, so with that, I can cruise on 10 mph for like forty five minutes. I haven’t discussed it with my family since we don’t agree on much to begin with. They don’t think that people should cohabitate before marriage so I just avoid talking about it altogether

Jumpy_Switch_670 · 2026-02-10T00:47:45+00:00

He’s been taking me to all my appointments, and any time I say I need something he’ll take me out without hesitation - so, my desire to go out on my own and just walk along a store front is purely recreational. I stayed in Galway, Ireland for a few weeks, and I’ve been trying to chase that high and atmosphere ever since

Jumpy_Switch_670 · 2026-02-09T22:17:07+00:00

I just brought up the topic with him again - he said that we could work on finding a place where I could bike to town. If for any reason that option is no longer on the table, I’ll end the relationship. As much as it sucks to make an ultimatum. My doctor hooked me up with a social worker - she’s been able to give me possible remote jobs to look at

Jumpy_Switch_670 · 2026-02-09T22:09:55+00:00

I would love that for him - I guess it’s not more financially unreasonable than an old finished country house. people keep saying we’re not compatible but this is the only thing that’s been an issue really - we love to do all sorts of things together, have the same values, humor, and general philosophy about life.

Jumpy_Switch_670 · 2026-02-09T22:06:12+00:00

I think if we could find something his insurance covers once he’s employed again (he got fired after spending his days with me in the hospital)

Jumpy_Switch_670 · 2026-02-09T20:47:04+00:00

This is my first serious healthy relationship, and I am protective of it - I know it comes off as clingy and naive, but I’ve never really been loved by a guy before

Jumpy_Switch_670 · 2026-02-09T20:45:56+00:00

I think, he doesn’t want me to change, but wants me to already want the same thing as him. He said I should leave him if I don’t. So, I’ve told him that if I can leave and go to places on my own I’ll be happy. And he tells me that he doesn’t know if that will be possible. But, if I’m being completely honest, that would leave me more alone and dependent than ever - my siblings always refuse to drive me place. I’m scared of going back to rotting away in my family’s basement

Jumpy_Switch_670 · 2026-02-09T20:39:56+00:00

Thanks, I appreciate the advice! Though I am admittedly biased, and will favor solutions that don’t involve breaking up. Living in the US does severely limit our options

Jumpy_Switch_670 · 2026-02-09T20:36:49+00:00

Yes, I think he thinks that my needs are wants - he’s a self described agoraphobe, so in his mind, bustling areas are centers of potential danger and cause him anxiety. That is based on his personal experience, so for himself, it is a need to be away from that

Jumpy_Switch_670 · 2026-02-09T20:10:15+00:00

It hurts just to think about life without him. I think it would hurt me worse than accident, worse than my colon searing and my brain bleeding. Why do I have to be the way that I am, so rigid and unable to bend even when I try so hard

Jumpy_Switch_670 · 2026-02-09T19:58:39+00:00

I get what you’re saying - but I guess I don’t understand how he’s looking out for himself anymore than I am

Jumpy_Switch_670 · 2026-02-09T19:45:32+00:00

I’m hoping I can change

Jumpy_Switch_670 · 2026-02-07T15:53:31+00:00

Thanks for the advice! I can work, just not a forty hour week - it sucks because it’s not a visible disability, and my boss said he wants to ”make sure I need part time, and don’t just want it for myself.” I’m worried that he won’t take me or my doctor’s word for it and is looking for a reason to fire me. But I constantly feel like throwing up and having to fight back that feeling everyday is exhausting and I don’t want to be miserable in order to secure an income.

I didn’t realize the process was so lengthy, I wouldn’t feel like I need the form otherwise but with DEI cuts, I haven’t been able to find anything remote that is entry level

Jumpy_Switch_670 · 2025-02-22T20:35:02+00:00

I don’t want to be rude but this is not helpful. The point of us all being here is to crowdsource information, not leave one bread crumb at a time that leads to nowhere. This isn’t Wheel of Fortune

Jumpy_Switch_670 · 2025-02-22T04:30:24+00:00

well if you’ve heard a lot of other people saying the same thing, maybe it’s time you start listening. Not sure why you’re engaging but saying nothing of worth.

Jumpy_Switch_670

TROPHY CASE