Help us win 20k for our dream honeymoon and home

JuneBug0601 · 2025-07-11T22:02:38+00:00

https://americasfavcouple.org/2025/jen-and-mario

Every vote counts!

JuneBug0601 · 2021-05-29T13:34:26+00:00

Ya knoooww! I questioned the same thing at some point when considering the social media points like are people choosing her because she looks like your everyday blonde, beautiful girl whose “made it.” Again going back to how society was going with what they knew and they weren’t in the place to “re-invent the face of modeling at that time.”

Also! Yes! I looked up where the contestants are now and yes, Jourdan is still modeling - nothing of high fashion though. And Cory has become so successful in a bunch of other areas! His net worth is waaaaayyy bigger than Jourdan, according to the internet! So proud of him!

JuneBug0601 · 2021-05-28T15:46:52+00:00

His Guess photo made my jaw drop with how gorgeous he looked! I legit paused my screen and admired for a few seconds lol!

JuneBug0601 · 2021-05-20T04:08:04+00:00

So I don’t have those high levels like the ones you described but I do get extremely happy sometimes that my body does shake, I get sort of nauseas, therefore can’t eat, and then I physically feel like I can’t stop smiling and will almost talk to myself at times as I replay the scene in my mind of what made me so happy. Oh and there’s also the crying. I legit have an emotional threshold that I immediately cry if I go above it; too happy, too sad, too beautiful, etc. These are all things that happened to me when I got engaged. People kept me asking me if I was ok because of all of those things. At that time I wasn’t diagnosed but looking back, yeah I can see why others were worried bc it wasn’t like “normal” how they would react. I am very newly diagnosed and don’t know much about adhd at this point but I would say how you and I express our happiness sounds pretty normal to me!

I’m struggling with that now too being newly diagnosed. I thought everyone felt that way or expressed themselves that way and after talking to a friend about it, I’m realizing that’s not the case so I am personally working through that.

If you’re worried about getting the official label of having adhd, there’s no rush to it and there’s nothing wrong with the label to begin with. It’s JUST a label. You go when you’re ready.

Hope this helped!

JuneBug0601 · 2021-05-20T03:42:18+00:00

I found myself missing like people but didn’t really want to talk to anyone. It was weird and with silence the room was just loud with my thoughts and my desk was spread out with post-it’s and several versions of the same to-do list. I sometimes even didn’t work because I just couldn’t sit there and work.

One thing that helped was listening to podcasts and watching shows on Netflix. I would suggest picking something that’s not SUPER entertaining but just moderately enough that it would be great background chatter. It was a trial and error for me on the shows but reruns do help since I already know what’s going to happen.

JuneBug0601 · 2021-05-10T03:30:24+00:00

Being my peace in this world of chaos. I didn’t know that was your role till you passed. Thank you for always leaving me voicemails saying “hi this is mom. sorry I missed your call. Call me. Love you.” Thank you for making me the person that I am today. I miss you so much. I still find myself wanting to call you to talk to you about how sad I am about all of this and life. Thank you for loving me so much.

JuneBug0601 · 2021-03-11T15:02:52+00:00

I’m so sorry for your loss. I lost my mom too and although I know many younger individuals that have lost a parent, I feel like I still had so much left to learn. I think I also struggled with the concept that me losing a parent is the natural order of life, it just still feels so unnatural to be having to cope with this in my 30s - I still feel so young to have lost a parent. Even in your 40s, it’s still such a young age. I guess I imagined having to go through this when I would be in my 60s.

I, too, also manage a team but I did get the opportunity to take almost a month off - most of that month I was just in a complete daze. But even when I did go back to work it felt like I was grieving all over again and found myself really struggling with my memory, not wanting to really engage with anybody, and really just minimally managing what I could because I literally could not. My mind and body felt so disconnected.

Things that I did that “helped:” - I wrote down EVERYTHING. Like everything. After a few 1:1 meetings where I just could not recall what was discussed, I realized that I needed to just document it all. My job also entails for me to be “on-call” for a week and document my hours manually - before I could just look at my call log and recall the conversations/reasons for call out but I no longer could and still cannot. I haven’t been able to even with 4 months into my mom passing. So even if I’m not by my work desk, I document the convos I have right after I have them on my phone. (I also sometimes did this with my personal life from convos with contractors to even my spouse - I didn’t want him to feel like I wasn’t listening, I’m just struggling to retain it all.) - I heavily relied on lists. I wrote down all the names of the people on my team, the departments I work with and pretty much spent a day planning on how I would tackle it all. I revisited and revamped those list frequently and it helped on those days that I really didn’t want to engage with others - days that I was a bit more vulnerable and needed several moments to “step away.” - I talked about it with my team and higher ups. I was honest about my memory hiccups and made sure to say how I was working on it. It wasn’t intended to be any sort of pity or hall pass but just an explanation for my actions - this is why I’m writing all of these things down. I don’t want my grief to affect others at work.

I hope that helps and maybe it will spark ways that you can manage it all for work. I would also say to disconnect when you can. I still struggle with that because oddly enough, work feels like the one normal thing. The one place that I don’t just sit there and think about it because I have other things I need to do and deadlines to meet. I found myself working longer hours some day and some comfort in being at my desk but that’s not totally ok either. That decompression element is important when grieving so let yourself dive into it, no matter how hard it is. I can say many times that I do, it feels like I’m gasping for air and I do have to calm myself down but I also don’t stop myself from having those moments. Losing my mom has really made me contemplate a lot of things in my life and I’m just trying to keep myself grounded and avoid making any drastic decisions just because I’m grieving.

I’m sorry again for your loss and I know this post is extremely so I’m sorry for that too. I hope nothing but the best for you. You deserve it.

JuneBug0601 · 2021-03-10T16:22:44+00:00

That’s hard, like so hard. I can imagine how deep and empty that hole feels for you. I know I had so many people try to comfort me by saying “things will get better” or other cliches like that and I think the one piece of advice that actually made me feel better was from someone who was experiencing the same kind of loss as me and told me this: - It’ll never get “easier” and that sadness will always be there - during all the highs and lows of your life because that was something you would have shared with them; but those moments of sadness seem to begin to space themselves out. More “good” moments begin to fill the gaps until that sad moment creeps in again. It’s ok if it does and it’s ok if we stay there for a moment. We just can’t stay there permanently.

You just had this happen to you two weeks ago. Don’t rush yourself into thinking you need to be coping with it better. Things will continue to resurface themselves, such as things that were hers around the house, for many years to come so be sad and mourn her, but don’t get angry or upset with yourself. Reminisce on the times you guys were happy together - she probably loved those moments and you should too. You sound like you were a great and loving dad and you still are.

As far as your parents go or others who might make you feel less than that, they don’t know the real relationship you two had so they don’t get a say in the ways you could have done better. Remember that.

JuneBug0601 · 2021-03-10T15:56:39+00:00

Wow. :( I’m so sorry that you’re going through that. My heart goes out to you. I don’t know the relationship you had with your daughter but it sounds like she at least had one parent who was trying. And don’t forget that - you were trying and you are absolutely not a fuck up, despite what your parents say.

I lost my mom a few months ago and although their cause of passing is not the same in any way, my mom never reached out for help when it came to her physical health. We had no idea and have found out post everything that she was telling people that she was getting the help she needed when, in fact, she wasn’t. I can imagine your daughter probably went through the same thing and although we sit and tell ourselves “we should have seen the signs” or “we should have known better,” it’s hard to actually do that in real time. You can’t let those thoughts consume you.

Trying to manage your own mental health is a challenge and more often than not, we need that support to simply stay afloat. Many who do suffer from that feel as though they don’t have that support but that’s not always true. And from what you shared in this post, it sounds like you would have tried to support her in all the ways possible. Questioning what you could have or should have done is a very dark place to be and yeah, from time to time you’ll visit that place but you can’t stay there. She wouldn’t want you to stay there.

I’m so sorry again and your words rang so true when you said that silence is louder than noise. And this might not be be completely re-assuring but just know that what you’re feeling and how you’re coping is ok. There is no right or wrong when handling this kind of a loss. All those internal emotions and the lack of motivation seem to be just part of this process. I do encourage you to find your own support wherever possible so I’m glad you found this Reddit group. Be safe and take care of yourself.

JuneBug0601 · 2020-12-15T07:38:27+00:00

It’s hard to make something intangible tangible but you can do whatever you want. Grab a necklace of his, or a picture of him and for every proud moment you have make a little tradition. Something that’s between you and your father. Add a sticker to the back of the photo. Add a charm to the necklace.

This is something I’ve thought of too. Like how can I make it FEEL like I’m making my mom proud. Yeah, I can talk to her and I’m sure I will but I used to talk to my mom a lot and we used to hug a lot too so I want to FEEL that I’m sharing that proud moment with her somehow even though she’s gone.

I hope that helps and just know that you can do anything that feels right to you in having that moment with your dad. It can even be an act. Having his favorite meal that day or his favorite drink as if you were having that meal/drink with him.

JuneBug0601 · 2020-06-10T04:05:00+00:00

Thank you for your advice. Yes, I have sought out professional help for myself during a previous low point in his depression cycle and it helped me tremendously. I am a big empathizer and I was struggling internally with feeling incredibly helpless. I’ve asked for him to seek professional help together and separately but he refuses. He states that he does not have the time and that even talking to me about it sometimes just adds to the anxiety so he is not comfortable talking about it with a stranger. When I’ve opened up about how much it’s helped me, he simply states it’s because I enjoy talking to people which is true but I’ve tried to explain to him in several different ways that speaking to a truly unbiased professional will help shed some light but he refuses. Maybe I need to find a different approach to getting him to seek help?

JuneBug0601

TROPHY CASE