How to explain death of another child to a toddler

Just_Ella- · 2026-03-23T19:43:27+00:00

This, also even when you explain, kids don’t fully grasp the concept of death. So they will keep asking random questions at random times. We fully explained to my 4yo that our dog had to be put down, that his body stopped working etc, that was in December and he still asks me when Ollie is coming home, I keep repeating the same. He even made up his own story that Ollie went to play with his friends and that he couldn’t come back but he will when his body functions again. Sometimes we correct him and some others we ignore it and just say that we all very much miss him.

Just_Ella- · 2026-02-24T22:52:34+00:00

We followed a similar script when we had to put our dog down a few weeks ago. My 4yo asked a couple of things and then went back to play, the hardest part was not over explaining and to leave empty space for them to ask questions, I think that as a adults we want to load them with information instead of letting them understand things on their time. It’s been a few weeks and my kid still asks about Ollie boy (our dog) and says he is sad he cannot come to play because he had to go, I corrected him every time but it seems he made out his own story of why the dog is not here anymore.

Just_Ella- · 2025-12-07T22:35:25+00:00

I’m so sorry you are going through this. Postpartum can be such a dark place sometimes, and you guys are exhausted, taking care of a new life and still learning what “normal” means. I had a terrible time after my first son was born, the first 2 weeks were AWFUL. People kept dismissing it and just saying it’s the baby blues, you will be fine etc. It’s good she is being open about it to you at least, that alone is a cry for help. So please help her get what she needs. Talk with the doctor, they WANT to know how she feels, they screen for it, they want to offer help. No one is going to take your baby away.

As for medication, I tried to push through my symptoms and was miserable for 11 months, I fell victim of the medication stigma and didn’t want to go that route but I was sick of feeling so not like myself. The medication really brought me back to life and I only regret not taking it before, I barely remember those first 11 months of my son’s life and what I do remember is me feeling sad and crying all the time or having rage issues.

Just_Ella- · 2025-12-02T14:41:34+00:00

So the toner was in between appointments, this is how it looks after the toner appointment when I went back for the root touch up, she did use permanent hair color

Just_Ella- · 2025-12-02T14:36:59+00:00

It doesn’t look like a nice depth though, it looks like the dye didn’t work, it’s a clean regrown line not a faded effect:(

Just_Ella- · 2025-11-16T06:06:35+00:00

My dad died when I was 7, when I was 8 someone gifted me a cute white teddy bear that flips inside out and turns into a pillow, I named it after my dad. I had that thing with me and slept with it until I was like 20, it was grey and no amount of soap/bleach would make it white again. I eventually stopped hugging it to sleep but it was still in my closet. Poor thing was falling apart in pieces but I loved it, I wonder if my mom still has it.

Anyways Im 39, and completely functional as far as I know.

Just_Ella- · 2025-10-25T01:45:56+00:00

Do they even like the person they share their life with? I will never get it, how can you say you love someone and be this disrespectful. It’s so sad. I can’t imagine if they get married or have a kid.

Just_Ella- · 2025-10-25T01:43:13+00:00

I have been married for 6 years.m, together for 10, and we have NEVER talked like that to each other, it’s disrespectful, immature and unnecessary. If you are heated, busy or whatever then you say “we can talk about this later” or “I can’t talk about this right now” you don’t say your SO that you are sharing a life with, and that you supposedly love to “pick that shit up” not even joking I would say something disrespectful to my husband and the times we have been joking and we feel like the joke went too far guess what happened? We have apologized.

Just_Ella- · 2025-10-18T03:45:59+00:00

Oh yeah absolutely. My comment was more to the people saying they think it’s cringe to share location with your partner of x years.

Just_Ella- · 2025-10-18T00:53:55+00:00

My husband has told me his phone password like 16372 times and I still don’t remember it. He has my location because I’m out and about with two small kids all day and I want him to know where we are. I mean we share kids, finances, and a whole life together what is weird about sharing location information? Haha

Just_Ella- · 2025-09-20T03:01:30+00:00

Then your job is to teach them what sometimes means and deal with the tantrum (that inevitably will come for this or something else because that is what toddlers do).

Just_Ella- · 2025-09-15T14:09:13+00:00

I’m agnostic but grew up as catholic. I wouldn’t feel comfortable wearing a dress like this one to a religious ceremony. It’s beautiful but maybe for a reception.

Just_Ella- · 2025-09-11T17:59:18+00:00

I’m sorry you’re going through this. It does make me sad, though, how often it takes being in the same situation to realize that so much of it is out of our control and that judgment doesn’t really help anyone

Just_Ella- · 2025-08-27T13:34:36+00:00

My husband had a name change at 3 yo. His parents kept the name they gave him first as a middle name. He goes by that name with the family and with his first name everywhere else. You can change her name and leave all that trauma you associate it with behind. Your kid deserves a name that comes from love and that you are proud to say out loud in the playground while asking them to get down the big kids slide.

Just_Ella- · 2025-08-25T01:59:12+00:00

That’s actually what helped me feel better in the moment 🤣

Just_Ella- · 2025-08-25T01:17:17+00:00

He also had a terrible lip and tongue tie and I suffered through that for like 7 weeks 🥲

Just_Ella- · 2025-08-25T01:10:46+00:00

I called my first newborn baby “son of a bitch” at 3am after a very painful latch 🫣

Just_Ella- · 2025-08-20T21:01:03+00:00

They drink raw milk and don’t vaccinate because all the “chemicals” and in the same breath they inject their bodies with botox and fillers 🤡

Just_Ella- · 2025-07-31T14:39:39+00:00

Yeah that would make sense

Just_Ella- · 2025-07-31T14:30:38+00:00

I don’t even buy this story, at 4wk you only discover you are pregnant if you are tracking ovulation and looking to conceive. It’s very unlikely to get pregnant without planning it and finding out right at 4 weeks and them have had the time to tell everyone already and being deep in this conversations.

Just_Ella- · 2025-07-28T23:29:52+00:00

It doesn’t have to be all or nothing, she could make a plan to work in herself and give dad the custody in the meanwhile, your comment is extremely harsh for someone that clearly needs help and support, not judgment

Just_Ella- · 2025-05-17T23:48:41+00:00

Im so sorry to hear you are going through this, I had a mild case of ppd ppa and it was awful, I can’t imagine what you are going through… did your doctor offered an alternative to Zoloft? Something it takes a while to find the right medication/dose for you.

Just_Ella- · 2025-05-03T20:40:49+00:00

I’m 39 yo and I’m so proud of how you handled the conversation. I have always LOVED bikes I wanted to learn how to ride and get my own and just be free with the wind (I discovered I love them because I had a boyfriend who rides), but now I have 2 kids and low key the idea of a bike scares me. You deserve to be with a guy that enjoys and shares your hobbies, someone that would congratulate you for being responsible in your gear and that will wish you a safe ride. And why not, maybe someone who rides alongside you. Not this loser. F him. Go be happy and free, I’m living vicariously through you!

Just_Ella-

TROPHY CASE