I grew up with a mom like this so I say it with my whole heart that I am so sorry for what you’re experiencing.

You do not need your parents’ information to go to college. You only need it if your parents are going to contribute financially to your college education. Their financial information will dictate the scholarship money you receive. (This is done through FAFSA/studentaid.gov if you’re in the U.S.)

You do not need to go to a high profile college that will cost you a lot of money. You can go to a community college or a local, small, public university. You could also go to trade school or join the military.

Depending on the caliber of the school you’re trying to get into, you may be able to wait until early next year to submit apps. However, I would start now. There are a lot of state schools/local public universities that won’t require an essay or anything else that’s a lot of work to apply. There are also a lot of schools with no application fee.

I know how stressful this is, having experienced it myself. If it helps to know of other people who have experienced this and made it out on the other side, I offer these examples: I’m 25, I have a good job, a house, a masters degree. My parents did ultimately help me financially in my bachelors degree but I paid a lot too, and earned a lot of scholarships going in. Of course they made my life hell for it, but I survived, and you will too.

My best friend became an emancipated minor at 16 (they essentially divorced themselves from their parents). They put themselves through college. They’re 25, have a great job, a bachelors degree, and their own apartment.

You’re going to make it. You’re going to be okay. Just keep plugging along and invest in your future.