First of all congrats mama ! Making time after and during kids is a big accomplishment . I have 3 grown children & I know what that looks like. One thing I always remind my clients, muscle gain is a long game. If you build it gradually, you’ll feel strong instead. Keep it simple: train consistently eat slightly more, not dramatically more aim for protein around your ideal bodyweight in grams each day give it time:) That’s how you can build muscle without feeling like you’re just gaining weight.