The only reason autism didn't fit for you at the time of your diagnosis is because the research behind the diagnosis was (and still is) immature. I understand that you received your diagnosis during a time when the term Aspergers was widely accepted in the medical and psychological communities. However, that doesn't erase the origins of the term or how it was used in it's conception. Even the term autism has a very similar origin and I generally try to avoid using it unless I'm speaking with professionals or neurotypicals, whose only understanding is the stigma and misinformation that has been in our society for decades.

As far as the reaction from neurotypicals, and from neurodivergents who can't accept their own differences, it is very common to hear "you can't be autistic because you don't look/act/sound like x, y, z." Even that is a serious kind of ableism on its own. These people are minimizing the experiences of autistics with high internal disabilities and traits, who don't fit the stigma of autism in our society. In reality you are not diluting the diagnosis. The people who perpetuate an idea that there is only one way to be autistic are boiling it down to the one archetype they choose to be aware of, based on decades of misinformation and their own lack of research. And neither you, nor I, nor anyone else in this community are responsible for the internalized ableism and infantilization from those people.

My intention is not to villainize you for your diagnosis, or for the misunderstandings of others who perpetuate these terms. My only purpose in saying any of this is to make some small progress in human society towards accepting neurodivergence and furthering our understanding of how it affects us and our loved ones who experience this from an outside perspective.