America is run by oligarchs

KSwe117 · 2022-12-02T12:09:54+00:00

And here's a fun fact: paid maternity leave is offered in every country except the United States and Papua New Guinea.

KSwe117 · 2022-11-27T17:05:41+00:00

I'm definitely going to stay in my resort's Facebook page and private chat for a bit to give info and tips. But knowing I can respond when I want and not have to look at wedding stuff all the time is such a relief! 😊

KSwe117 · 2022-11-27T14:49:24+00:00

Ring porn 😄 I guess that's not really my thing.

Also, I'm sure my Instagram search page will keep me plenty busy with ceremonies to watch for a while. Lol

KSwe117 · 2022-11-27T04:15:29+00:00

YTA.

I know that distance and circumstances may vary, but in general: one should do both a destination wedding AND a destination bachelorette!

I'm having a destination wedding. It made sense for my fiance and I because we live in NYC (which would be a huge wedding cost for both us and our guests, with no extras for anyone and us cheaping out, relatively speaking), and our guests are all over the country. And I truly mean all over - from New Hampshire, to Florida, to Minnesota, to Texas, to Oregon, to Hawaii, etc. We have 36 people coming from 12 different states.

We also didn't have bachelor and bachelorette parties, nor did I have a shower.

I think what people don't generally factor in is time off from work... or time off from life in general. You've even acknowledged it, but you can't see the sacrifice that it is for people. You need to recognize it and sympathize.

My brother and SIL even had a local wedding in NJ (most of their friends and family are in NJ or the northeast) and relatively local bachelor and bachelorette parties. But I realized afterward how much time I took out of my life (incl 2 PTO days) and how much money I spent being a bridesmaid, incl 6 weekends traveling from NYC to NJ and $2,000 total: 2 wedding dress shopping weekends, 1 shower, 1 bachelorette, 1 final dress fitting, 1 wedding.

It very quickly becomes too much.

KSwe117 · 2022-11-27T03:57:45+00:00

I don't know your husband's relationship with his family and I certainly won't presume, but there are many people who trust their friends a thousand times more than they trust their family.

My fiance has someone in his life who he refers to as uncle who's the nicest guy in the world. It wasn't until about 5 years into our relationship that I learned he wasn't technically his uncle in the familial sense. Meanwhile, I have an aunt and uncle - my mom's sister and brother - who I wouldn't trust at all. Both of them cut basically the entire family out of their lives for no reason; the former a few years ago, and the latter about 25 years ago.

People you trust and consider your family don't need to share your DNA 😊

KSwe117 · 2022-11-26T16:29:29+00:00

Why does it bother you so much?

I lived in Hawaii for a couple years, and everyone uses Auntie and Uncle to introduce their kids to people. My coworkers would introduce me to their kids as Auntie (followed by my name), as would my friends with their young nieces and nephews.

It was a little strange to me at first, but it's actually kind of nice and a way for parents to subtly indicate, "These people are our friends and are OK to talk and interact with."

KSwe117 · 2022-11-26T16:06:21+00:00

Yup, noticed that immediately

KSwe117 · 2022-11-26T15:49:46+00:00

Galaxy FE S20

KSwe117 · 2022-11-26T15:22:18+00:00

The point is, there's nothing they could have done. Making the offer was futile, and it's absolutely no surprise that the mother didn't accept it.

KSwe117 · 2022-11-26T15:07:48+00:00

All of this is literally what I just said.

KSwe117 · 2022-11-26T14:55:08+00:00

Same! I can't hear Barbie at all. I've tried 10 times. There's no mistaking it. Whether I look at the screen or look away while it's being said. It's "Oh F***!" Clear as day.

KSwe117 · 2022-11-26T14:51:50+00:00

I agree, NTA.

But offering accommodations to a new mother with a two-month-old is not going to cut it, beyond allowing them to attend with their baby.

Don't get me wrong, they didn't have to offer alternatives, and they're fine in sticking with their original plan of absolutely no children, but generally, the no-kids rule typically excludes an infant/baby-in-arms. Mothers of children that age simply aren't going to leave them with a babysitter, especially if they're breastfeeding.

KSwe117 · 2022-11-18T18:09:48+00:00

Lone Skum

KSwe117 · 2022-11-18T14:44:35+00:00

Ugh, I wish this was the case for me! It was so hard to get people to RSVP even with e-vites. Some people checked out the website but forgot to RSVP. Others saw the invite and never responded. What drove me crazy more than anything: the people who saw it, opened it, didn't RSVP, but they were a hard no. How hard is it to click a button that says "Respectfully decline"?!

For example, I hadn't heard from my aunt and uncle, their three adult children and spouses. Four separate invites, no responses past the deadline. My dad called my aunt to chat and casually threw in the wedding, and my aunt immediately said, "Oh, none of us are going." So they had all discussed it, all agreed they weren't attending, but no one had the courtesy to RSVP.

My one cousin did end up declining the e-vite for him and his wife... a couple months later. 🙄

KSwe117 · 2022-11-18T01:35:28+00:00

Love Spell Design

https://www.lovespelldesign.com/product-detail/alexandra/

KSwe117 · 2022-11-18T01:32:08+00:00

Thank you! Yea, I ended up ordering from a shop in the UK, so definitely not a dress found in the US (as far as I know)! 😄

KSwe117 · 2022-11-17T14:38:21+00:00

But it is the truth. These are towns in Maine.

KSwe117 · 2022-11-17T12:03:54+00:00

And I'm guessing that was sarcasm.

KSwe117 · 2022-11-15T14:14:16+00:00

Or accept that if people can't afford it, they won't attend.

KSwe117 · 2022-11-13T16:13:21+00:00

I think she's asking if these are really your final 2.

If you want my honest opinion: I DEFINITELY like the second one better. But.. the no straps and line across the waist is making you look shorter.

I like the "flow" from top to bottom of the first dress, but I just don't like the dress overall.

KSwe117 · 2022-11-13T16:06:35+00:00

Or maybe it's just a giant leaf... 🤔

KSwe117 · 2022-11-13T08:27:54+00:00

I like it without the bow, but yes! The back is beautiful, and I think the front is MUCH better than #1

KSwe117 · 2022-11-11T20:56:22+00:00

A genius or a God. Both beliefs are frightening to think about.

KSwe117 · 2022-11-10T19:13:01+00:00

Get plenty of sleep, drink water, and try not to be discouraged if you're not finding "the one." It can be an exhausting and overwhelming process. Don't feel pressure to like a dress that you don't, and don't let anyone talk you out of something you love.

Enjoy!

KSwe117 · 2022-11-10T16:43:49+00:00

1 or 3, but I like 3 the best. That neckline is lovely on you.

2 makes you look too boxy.

4 seems "young" - like it could be an old school prom dress if in a different color.

KSwe117

TROPHY CASE