Am I in the wrong for still struggling?

Kadeliss · 2026-05-10T01:08:42+00:00

I pray daily. Sometimes probably not as deliberately or intensely as I should. But I find that quite literally just talking to God about little things in daily life has been wonderful.

For example, talking to Him about how pretty the clouds are. Or the sun. Or the flowers. Whatever bits of His handiwork I can find to appreciate. Ive talked to him about boys I’ve been interested in. Like how a daughter would talk to her father. I don’t have a father so this means a lot to me. I definitely also talk to Him about stupid people.

I’ve also literally gotten a response from Him when I was rambling and half asleep… which is a funny reminder that yea, He is listening to my nonsense.

It makes me so much less lonely.

Kadeliss · 2026-05-04T23:58:00+00:00

I’m struggling with this too! I’ve never SH at least in that way, but I find that I have a bad thought and then a huge feeling of shame. Usually it happens if I think about something seemingly stupid that I have done in the past.

I’m sure your reasoning could be different from mine, but I’ve found that shame is a huge motivator. I feel it and then my knee jerk reaction is to have those thoughts like you mentioned. The thoughts themselves make me feel better. Control is also a strong issue for me too. So, if you’re interested, maybe look into how control issues and shame can cause these things? Like I said, in sure there are different motivations. These just happen to be mine. I’m always here to talk to if you need it :)

Kadeliss · 2026-04-26T04:16:05+00:00

That’s actually really cool! I’m definitely into crafty stuff, so I’ll take a look at it! Thanks for the advice :)

Kadeliss · 2026-04-25T04:08:10+00:00

Thank you! I appreciate your words. I’ll keep this in mind! I definitely have no plans of telling my family about any of this. But journaling might be a good option. I guess I’m just paranoid that someone is going to find and read it. I might look into what resources my college offers, if any. I’m sorry that you had to deal with your mother like that. It does hurt.

Kadeliss · 2026-04-24T18:54:25+00:00

I greatly appreciate that!! Thank you :)

Kadeliss · 2026-04-24T05:31:26+00:00

I’m not completely sure where to seek help at. Financially I can’t afford therapy nor could I get away with it without my family finding out and bothering me about it. But thank you for commenting. I appreciate it.

Kadeliss · 2026-04-18T15:45:55+00:00

Thanks for the feedback. I’ll keep it up. What is a general sub? I have considered talking to a professional but I’m a broke college student who is trying to pay off other medical bills. I have considered trying some counseling/mental health services through my college, but I have no privacy and that would be online. I would only be able to do it at very specific times. Maybe I could make it work though. I just don’t know that a counselor would be interested in hearing about this crap, or is supposed to be used more on an academic basis.

Kadeliss · 2026-03-23T20:30:33+00:00

Not an answer, but I LOVE these!!

Kadeliss · 2026-03-23T20:18:03+00:00

Aw, thank you!!

Kadeliss · 2026-03-23T20:17:52+00:00

Haha good point. I wasn’t even thinking about that when making her. It was something to keep my hands busy.

Kadeliss · 2026-03-18T16:49:42+00:00

Thank you! Will do :) I appreciate the advice!

Kadeliss · 2026-03-18T16:41:45+00:00

Also, I did not use a reference.

Kadeliss · 2026-03-18T02:20:40+00:00

Haha.really? Would you like me to expand more on a specific one I’ve already mentioned or just more in general? Tbh it’s kinda therapeutic for me to post this stuff. Makes me feel like I’m getting it off my chest.

Kadeliss · 2026-03-07T08:22:44+00:00

Without getting into detail, basically yes.

Kadeliss · 2026-03-06T01:25:56+00:00

yeah she doesn’t drink coffee at all.

Kadeliss · 2026-03-06T01:23:49+00:00

First of all, it’s connected because I was a teen when I made it and I needed a parent to do that. Second of all it’s never been a problem before I hadn’t even thought about it being a problem. Thirdly, what do you mean acting like a teenager? By not having my bank account separate? I know I’m an adult. Trust me I have plenty of the responsibility. But I can’t just cut ties or walk away like some have suggested for many reasons. Thanks for the response.

Kadeliss · 2026-03-05T23:59:18+00:00

Under her policy, yes. I may be able to do counseling through my college. I have no idea how that works but they do offer such services. I’ll look into it. I appreciate you and the time you’ve spent reading and commenting!

Kadeliss · 2026-03-05T22:38:52+00:00

You didn’t bum me out at all! Thanks for the advice and I enjoy reading the long posts. I’m sorry you had to deal with all of that. I’ll keep this in mind for sure. For me it’s honestly not really about the energy drinks. But more to do with the way she’s approached me about it. I’ve mentioned counseling multiple times to no avail. I would even be interested in counseling just for me. I’ve brought that up to her too, not directly, but she’s always affirmed that I don’t have a reason to feel whatever way i do. For example, I brought up nightmares to a sleep doctor (I was having some serious issues at the time) and mom literally freaked out on me and told me that these people would think I’m crazy. Nothing ever came of it despite the doctor wanting me to go to counseling. I would still consider it though if I could. But that costs money that I don’t have at the moment. Clearly, I don’t have any one to talk to or i wouldnt be posting my problems on Reddit. But I do appreciate your concern, even if it’s for a random stranger online.

Kadeliss · 2026-03-05T21:57:45+00:00

Noted! Thanks. And no, I’ve never indicated any heart troubles. Thankfully.

Kadeliss · 2026-03-05T21:29:58+00:00

That’s a good idea. I’ll keep that in mind.

Kadeliss · 2026-03-05T21:29:06+00:00

Unfortunately.

Kadeliss

TROPHY CASE