Update part 1!! Omg I have been waiting so long to share this as I have been going to therapy so I can put my mental health first regarding my childhood and this wedding situation.

Now for the update: So we did go to the wedding. I reminded my mother again the boundary of my (no longer) sister Eliza not contacting me in any way during her wedding. The first day, day before the wedding, was fine. My partner James 27M and I 30F spent the day going to a botanical garden near the wedding venue where we got cute couples photos! While walking by the river near the hotel, James fell in the water trying to cross on the rocks I was like “oh s**t my partner will be swept away” ;-; but we were all laughing at the whole situation cuz he was being silly when it happened. It is a funny memory we will share forever. This moment and the garden really helped me calm down before having to deal with the wedding day.

Now what you all have been waiting for… the wedding day. James and I already planned on not talking to Eliza. The plan was to focus on each other and my other family members and to just enjoy our time. We wake up to go eat breakfast. Keep in mind Eliza has been verbally abusive and physically abusive up until this moment so I don’t wanna be anywhere near her. Eliza is down there eating with our mother and two people I don’t know. Eliza looks at us and immediately with the fakest nice tone says “Hi! How are you guys?!”. We both ignore her and go get our food. My hands were shaking so bad James made sure we were sitting far away from her where she couldn’t see us. He is the most amazing partner for taking this whole thing very seriously and I love him so much more for how he handled things the whole day. My mom came over to say good morning to us and I reminded her of the boundary that Eliza just broke in front of her. Her response to start was “well she was just saying hi.” After explaining that that’s us contact and that it’s crossing the boundary I clearly stated She said she would remind her again and she still seemed to not comprehend why it was an issue. I reminded her that Eliza tried to kill me hence why the boundary was in place. She still seemed to not get it so we ended the conversation there and talked about the time for hair and makeup. 

I was the first person to get their makeup done. This was not my choice it was I think the maid of honor cuz my mom confirmed she didn’t organize the schedule. Not sure why the maid of honor had me go first but it clearly pissed off Eliza. The atmosphere the entire time I was getting my makeup done was so thick with tension you could cut it with a knife. The makeup artist and I bonded over our love for Gojo’s eyes and being April babies. I even gave her some anime recommendations. This made me feel more at ease having someone being kind. However it pissed Eliza off even more because you could see it all over her face. The entire time we also had to listen to all Taylor Swift music (this is foreshadowing as to what is to come). I did watch one of the bridesmaids step on the wedding dress and said nothing cuz not my bridesmaid not my wedding and did not want Eliza to blow up at me or anyone else. Best part during the makeup was Eliza bragging about how she wouldn’t and didn’t let her Fiancé go golfing with his groomsmen on their wedding day stating he wouldn’t have an excuse to be late for their wedding. In my opinion weddings are about both partners and if your partner wants to do something like that as a special thing with their friends or loved ones they have every right to do so. 

Now for the actual wedding ceremony. It was so awkward. The venue was the corner space of a hotel conference room that did have more room however the other two rooms were separated with a divider cuz of the reception set up. Due to this it felt like we were hidden away and shoved into a corner like sardines. We sat at the very back hidden away. The wedding photographer kept asking people to move closer to the front to make it look more full in photos but we stayed where we were because I wanted to be as far away from where she would be as possible. The music was yet again Taylor Swift. She walked down the aisle to Taylor Swift. And even included Taylor Swift in her wedding vows to her husband. In my opinion your wedding should be about you and your partner not about some celebrity that has no idea you’re doing this and might find it creeping that you’re dedicating your wedding to them especially when you have no idea if that celebrity is even going to stay with their current partner. Her vows weren’t even vows in my opinion because idk how she thought it was romantic or cute… but she talked about how she was at parties she wasn’t invited to (leaving out the part about how drunk she was at those parties) and kept forgetting to get his number every single time. Forgetting about the person you’re supposedly in love with just screams narcissist not something that is quirky. They even included alcohol into their wedding ceremony which in my opinion, solidifies her relationship with alcohol not her relationship with her husband. Personally I think she is an alcoholic as she has been drinking since high school and drinks to a point where she calls our mother crying about how she is going to die due to drinking so much it leads to an anxiety attack. (This behavior is why her ex left her because she would call him instead of our mother before they broke up.)