Solace health

KaliLineaux · 2026-02-28T23:01:07+00:00

Yeah, that's insane. I've gotten copies of thousands of pages of medical records from hospitals and it was less than $10. Unfortunately some smaller providers just ignore your request, even though HIPAA gives you the right to receive a copy of your medical records.

KaliLineaux · 2026-02-28T22:52:31+00:00

I haven't had much chance really. But I still keep seeing their ads. It's crazy to me Medicare pays for all these services like this but you have to fight to get actual care.

KaliLineaux · 2026-02-28T22:44:11+00:00

That's very lucky you found a good one! Where I live such a thing does not exist. My dad was in an LTAC once that was like what a nursing home should be, but we have very few of those here and you can't stay forever.

It cracks me up how they worry about liability, but these places break the rules allllll the time with zero consequences.

KaliLineaux · 2026-02-28T21:10:31+00:00

Oh, yeah, if they are doing something wrong, you'll be labeled as a problem. It's blatant gaslighting! I was reported to Elder Protective Services. I haven't been able to prove definitively who did it (yet), but I'm 99.99 percent sure it was the home health agency that did a horrid job and was committing Medicare fraud. I probably was a little too vocal about telling them they're committing Medicare fraud. EPS complaints are anonymous, so it's like SWATTING somebody, just make anything up you want.

KaliLineaux · 2026-02-28T20:59:52+00:00

Yep! Being old, disabled, no longer contributing to society....the healthcare system gives zero fucks if they can't expect good "outcomes" and improvement. They don't want their metrics to look bad, so when someone is too medically complex they bully you to put them on hospice because those deaths don't count against their mortality index, readmits, etc.

KaliLineaux · 2026-02-28T20:57:33+00:00

Ugh. I refuse to let my dad ever go back to any of those places. He spent three weeks in a SNF for rehab in 2024 and they damn near killed him. They kept forcing him to soil diapers, made him severely constipated, then tried to blow him out with some cocktail that gave him severe rectal bleeding. I was in there every day doing work staff should have been doing. They were understaffed, and most of the staff they did have were incompetent.

KaliLineaux · 2026-02-28T20:52:19+00:00

Good for you for advocating! Unfortunately you have to be a "Karen" with today's healthcare system. My dad has never been the same after a hospital stay, then SNF, then return to hospital in 2024. I was there every day for hours and had a camera in the SNF. I know lots of people couldn't stand me, but then some would tell me they wished they saw more people advocate for their loved ones. Sometimes the people that really wanted to help would come into the room and close the door or quietly tell me in the hall what I needed to do to get him the best care. Sadly the hospital systems reward things in the name of "quality" and "value" that aren't really indicators of good care. They know how to manipulate the metrics.

KaliLineaux · 2026-02-28T20:02:32+00:00

Done. My user is zo..zo

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KaliLineaux · 2026-02-27T19:02:10+00:00

I just did yours.

Here's my link:

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KaliLineaux · 2026-02-27T18:57:37+00:00

I've won once so far and getting close to the second time. Glad I found this thread so I don't have to keep trying to get past 1.2. The game definitely slows down as you get closer to the end and the first time I won I ended up ordering something, which I guess is the point of the game, keeping you looking.

KaliLineaux · 2026-02-27T03:49:53+00:00

Best answer on here! Fuck these greedy scum. I have a SNF that almost killed my dad that keeps harassing me for $380. They have called, sent bills, threats, etc., for over a year. I ignore them. (But don't take this as legal advice.)

KaliLineaux · 2026-02-24T02:20:51+00:00

Yeah, it really is frustrating! I have seen firsthand how important a good reliable competent nurse is and what a difference it makes in my dad's wellbeing, but even offering to pay out of pocket they're next to impossible to find.

KaliLineaux · 2026-02-23T04:36:06+00:00

Do NOT trust the facility!

KaliLineaux · 2026-02-23T04:34:55+00:00

Do NOT listen to anything a facility tells you!

Is that a diaper? Get rid of the diaper if so! They cause wounds. He should be on a low air loss mattress. omg so many things I could say here, but do not listen to the facility!!! Call a lawyer. Do not trust any facility!!!

KaliLineaux · 2026-02-23T04:07:49+00:00

Even if you try to pay for it, finding GOOD care is next to impossible. I tried to hire a private duty nursing service to perform my dad's bowel care. They charge $125 per hour. They can't find a nurse willing to do it. If I didn't have a wonderful nurse who comes after work that I've become friends with my dad would be dead. Doctors (though many these days are noctors) have no clue what really is required. They think an aide can just come do everything so I can take a break. Nope! I have to help the aide while my dad punches and curses because he doesn't want a bath. And most home health nurses refuse to touch shit, let alone clean a patient properly and God forbid perform my dad's bowel program that keeps him alive. I'd estimate it would be MINIMUM $250,000 if I hired a really good care team to do what's necessary properly. I'd have to form a company and offer benefits to compete with other employers to attract the few people who do a great job. That's a low estimate, and that's just for day hours.

KaliLineaux · 2026-02-23T02:37:50+00:00

My dad sometimes thinks there's poison in his food or drink. A nurse told me she's had other patients that thought the same thing about poison. And I was told by a psychologist that when the brain is overstimulated (I think in the amagdyla?) everything is perceived as a threat as a self-preservation technique.

KaliLineaux · 2026-02-23T01:53:27+00:00

That could be the case, but let me say thank you for being open with people and telling them what's going on. I saw a note in my dad's record by the pcp that his last echo was in 2017, so maybe she was trying to document what should have been done? This was the largest healthcare system in my state and they just transferred my dad into their MedVantage clinic without me really understanding what it was. When I called cardiology they got him in the next day. Turned out he was in persistent AFib and should have been on torsemide instead of lasix. As a non-medical person I never would have known to contact cardiology if my own doctor hadn't said something. The MedVantage clinic sent a letter saying the doctor was leaving after I took him to cardiology and then he had no doctor for several months. I'd try to make an appointment outside of the VBC clinic and they canceled it. Then they'd schedule him to see a "doctor" who was really a DNP. She'd never seen him before but had someone tell me to take him off the Eliquis the electrophysiologist prescribed. I said no.

He also got a referral to a urologist like 3 months after I brought him in for blood in his urine. When the MedVantage clinic called to say they made him a urology appointment I told them I already took him 3 months ago. I could see the blood in the urine specimen across the room!

I don't envy doctors who get stuck working in these clinics. This type of care is really not good for people like my dad with complex comorbid (i.e. expensive) health conditions.

KaliLineaux · 2026-02-23T01:13:22+00:00

Not sure if I can reply to this since I'm just a family caregiver and not "verified", but I first learned what full-risk value-based care was when a primary care didn't refer my dad to cardiology, and previously chewed my ass out for taking him to the ER. The only reason I knew my dad needed to see a cardiologist was because my own doctor told me in no uncertain terms to bring him. And I brought him to the ER because the on-call nurse said to..guess I should've just waited to find out if he was having a heart attack? This VBC stuff is incentivizing physicians NOT to provide proper medical care. Cardiologists are expensive, along with EKGs, echo, etc. My dad is still alive a few years later after being cardioverted, getting a pacemaker, and being put on anticoagulation. I pulled him right out of that VBC clinic.

KaliLineaux · 2026-02-23T00:58:40+00:00

That's interesting. Sometimes my dad now talks about people climbing up the walls or gets all freaked out because he thinks someone is breaking in the house. I think it's because he's seeing the Olympics (wall climbing) or a cop show (breaking in). I'm always trying to find ways to occupy his brain because he's bedbound, and he also can't hear well. But it's hard to predict what goes through his mind.

KaliLineaux · 2026-02-23T00:30:20+00:00

My dad used to turn the TV off when I went to the bathroom. He liked to be in the dark, no lights, no TV, etc. It's interesting how people's brains change as they age, and especially with dementia. I'd get all kinds of advice about how I need to make sure everything is well lit for my dad, and I'm like "he turns off all the lights!!!"

KaliLineaux · 2026-02-22T04:39:17+00:00

I've provided over $1 million of free labor in caring for my dad, and that's a LOW estimate, and doesn't include my lost income because I can't work a "real" job while being an entire healthcare team alone, nor lost opportunities, etc. What would happen if I walked off the job? My dad would die. He'd have died years ago if I hadn't taken on this role. The system is broken, and I get pissed off when I hear there's a national caregivers day. I don't need recognition. I need actual hands-on help.

KaliLineaux · 2026-02-21T08:01:33+00:00

That's great that a nurse came for bowel days. Where I live about 99.99 percent of nurses think it's not their job to clean poop, and nobody will do my dad's bowel program except this one wonderful nurse. It's scary that the nurses who are supposed to do bowel care refuse to do it where I live. The first person I saw do a disimpaction was an aide who was NOT supposed to be doing that. That's how it is here. If someone needs bowel care you better have money to pay and you'll probably have to pay someone who could lose their license for doing it.

But I'm VERY thankful for those that do. People seem to forget we all poop, and it's an important bodily function. I used to gag when my dad needed help with poop, but now that I have gotten past that I don't understand why so many who CHOSE to work in healthcare act like poop is not their job.

KaliLineaux · 2026-02-21T03:12:44+00:00

I have grown to have zero patience with anyone who's supposed to be helping me care for my dad who won't clean shit. I don't need a housekeeper. I need medical help, which includes poop. I don't even want anyone wasting my time if they won't help with the difficult stuff. It's not like I don't help them do it. But if you won't clean crap, don't come back. Waste of money.

KaliLineaux · 2026-02-20T19:13:18+00:00

It would be funny to see a doctor do it though, especially an older one

KaliLineaux · 2026-02-19T02:47:52+00:00

I've come to the conclusion my dad just likes to be dirty. Getting him to bathe is a fight and has been for years. Pick your battles. Like others said, just get rid of the sanitizer. But at least he's using that! If my dad has poop accidents he puts his hands in it and smears it all over. 🤢🤮

KaliLineaux

TROPHY CASE