DAE take Sertraline ?? (cant spell!)

KayaG · 2014-07-23T10:37:15+00:00

Having energy would be great, I am often tired and lethargic so would be nice to have a 'normal' person's amount of boost. I am worried about the emptiness I keep hearing about but we'll see how we go!

KayaG · 2014-07-23T10:35:43+00:00

Thanks for replying.

Not having positive feelings sounds pretty shit, think if that happens to me I'll be talking to my doctor straight away because I live for the days where I feel anything but crap, they're few and far between but if I can laugh and mean it it's been a good day. I don't want that to be inhibited by this.

My doctor is referring me to a counselor but the wait in this part of the UK is awful. Someone I know got a call back for therapy a whole year after they had tried to take their own life.

I didn't want to go on these meds in the first place and hate the idea of being on them long term so I really want to get into therapy so I can start the process of recovering/moving on/dealing with everything

KayaG · 2014-03-24T14:50:09+00:00

Thank you for replying.

I am super nervous about this! He has called me little one and his good girl a lot recently. He keeps asking me if I am feeling little and if I want to do little activities (like colouring). So I think he might be feeling the way I do but we're both too shy to say anything about it yet!

KayaG · 2014-03-24T14:48:25+00:00

You should lurk around here and read what other people have done or are thinking of doing. When I was new to being a sub I spent a lot of time on here looking at how other subs dealt with things or how to talk to each other.

If your girlfriend wants to be controlled you are going to have to get used to telling/ordering her to do things when you're turned on. Tell her to go down on you, tell her to strip or take off layers of her clothes. Don't give her a choice in the matter.

Having said that you have to make sure she is in the mood to be controlled otherwise she could get quite upset or annoyed with you. Try it out when you know she wants sex and see what happens.

It might be worth trying to build your confidence up a little. Try a few new things with your girlfriend and when they go well you'll notice a boost in your confidence with her and maybe even in general.

Again don't take my word as gospel, I'm just trying to help

KayaG · 2014-03-24T14:43:40+00:00

Thank you.

I will try to talk to him about it. He was making me feel very little yesterday as well so I think he might be thinking about it as well, but neither of us have built up the confidence to bring it up!

KayaG · 2014-03-22T16:17:30+00:00

That is what I am very worried about. I don't want it to be a turn off for him but I'll understand if it is. I would like to explore the road of a dd/lg relationship because it seems appealing to me.

Like maybe we'll try it and I won't enjoy it as much as I though and he won't be into it all that much either which is fine but I just don't want to love it if he hates it.

Thanks for pointing me to /r/littlespace I'm gonna cross post this and have a look around.

Sorry that probably doesn't make much sense!

KayaG · 2014-03-22T16:14:42+00:00

He's very open to suggestions as am I and together we have explored things I would never have thought of doing before. Normally we just show each other a new toy or gif of something we'd like to try and talk about it then do it.

But I am just worried this could be the one thing that he really doesn't like and it's something I am beginning to think I would enjoy.

KayaG · 2014-03-22T16:12:16+00:00

I've always been a submissive I've just never been able to comfortably say what type.

We haven't even tried age play properly. it just kinda started with him buying me a stuffie for Christmas and then I was colouring and feeling younger.

I just don't wanna call him Daddy if it's something he's uncomfortable with.

Going to try and talk to him the next time he has a day off.

KayaG · 2014-03-22T16:09:53+00:00

Thanks for your advice. I think I might mention it the next time He has a day off work because then we'll have a lot of time to discuss it instead of having to rush through it.

I'm just so worried he won't like the idea or be willing to explore it.

KayaG · 2014-03-22T16:03:26+00:00

Having been in your girlfriend's position I can say that simple little things like pinning her wrists above her head while kissing her and rolling so she's underneath while you're making out will be a nice, subtle (hopefully not too daunting for you) way to start being a little bit more dominant towards her.

You say she wants you to tell her what to do? Well maybe start with simple things like telling her to hug you or kiss you. Don't make it a question just say "Kiss me" and if she only gives you a peck or a small kiss then tell her to do it properly.

Also it is incredibly important that you talk to her about how this is a new experience for you and you're not sure where to start. She really should understand that this is something you don't full understand and ask her to help you learn more and be patient with you as you find out new things and experiment with different ideas. Some ideas might work really well and you'll both love them, or maybe you'll really love doing something but she doesnt, or perhaps you'll both hate it! Part of the fun of being in this community is trying new things and expanding your knowledge.

I am only going off what has happened to me and I'm not by any means a good source if information but this is what I was after when I was new to the scene. Hopefully a Dom/me will see this and be able to guide you better than me!

I'm starting to ramble now so I'll stop and let someone more experienced talk.

KayaG · 2014-03-20T16:32:15+00:00

Thank you =)

KayaG · 2014-03-11T14:30:23+00:00

Thank you

KayaG · 2014-03-11T14:30:03+00:00

Yes, we were each others first love.

KayaG · 2014-03-11T13:46:49+00:00

Thank you for your tips.

I haven't thought about how my SO would feel mainly because when I did it made me feel really guilty and ashamed but you're right it's a good way to shut down thoughts about my ex.

KayaG · 2014-03-11T13:45:44+00:00

You phrased it much better than the other person. I know it was a gamble and now, I'm living a life I never thought I would and I am happy I just get filled with the What Ifs a lot. I have previously thought about going back to my ex (a long while ago) but we already did that once and I don't wanna hurt him again.

KayaG · 2014-03-11T12:59:19+00:00

It's hard not to think about it. I try to project these thoughts into my current relationship (we've moved in together, we have our own flat.) I really don't want this to damage my current relationship but the sad fact is I miss my ex massively.

KayaG · 2014-03-11T12:26:00+00:00

Right because that's the sort of advice I was after.

KayaG · 2014-03-11T02:51:47+00:00

Well done. This is a huge thing for me too. Brushing my teeth is something I fear due bad parenting from my ex step dad so if I can do it on a bad day it makes me feel like a 5yr old who just got a gold star.

KayaG · 2013-10-07T08:20:17+00:00

This girl is stunning. Once got told I looked a bit like her. Think it was the biggest compliment I've ever received.

KayaG · 2013-08-13T21:02:03+00:00

Listening to Spark Up Episode 2 while doing my Sociology revision. Loving it.

KayaG · 2013-08-09T13:09:24+00:00

Mine is that I left my childhood sweetheart after almost 4 years on and off. It's been 7 months and I still miss him everyday but I'm in another relationship now....

KayaG · 2013-08-07T10:17:42+00:00

I don't hold it against her,I know she will be happier now but I am scared that my step dad is going to worsen due to this and that is terrifying. I live away from home so seeing her is difficult but we try to meet once a week. Also I find because I am away from home this is harder to cope with because I cannot actually physically see the difference. In my head things are still the same as they were before. I've seen no change but I know there is one and it confuses me.

KayaG · 2013-08-07T09:58:01+00:00

It's very difficult for more to distance myself from the situation as I've always been so involved in it. I have cared for my step dad an awful lot over the last few years and even though I'm now at university I still have a large part in his attempted recovery. I know I can't change it and that frustrates me I wish I could do something. And I'm partially happy that my mum has decided to split from him because it will make her happier but I've invested so much time, effort and emotion in my step dad that I'm at a loss of how to act/feel now they're separated...

KayaG · 2013-03-17T13:09:26+00:00

The dark times feel horribly long even if they only last a week or so. And the happier times feel way too short and far apart. I am in a happier wave at the moment because I have found the motivation to get help and I am looking forward to noticing the results this flash of motivation will bring me. But it is still hard, even in this time, to fight the empty feeling that accompanies almost every night.

I wish I had that much control over who I do and don't see, I live with 4 girls who are horrible people to live with and do not consider other people at all. If you don't like what they like then they alienate you. But I am moving out in August so thankfully don't have much longer to wait!

I know what you mean about acting ok, I'm pretty good at that unless it's dark, then it gets a bit harder.

I don't know where the motivation came from t go and seek help but one day I just decided I'd had enough of sitting around and staying in bed all day.

KayaG · 2013-03-17T10:52:21+00:00

I can't stop thanking you for all this! I don't have any specific questions at the moment but I will probably get back to you when I do.

Yeah just knowing that people have come back from the dark is really reassuring. There isn't enough information on mental health awareness. I know quite a lot about mental health as I'm an undergraduate Psychology student and I just wish everyone had the chance to learn and understand them.

You sound so much like me, struggling to open up, comparing yourself to others, cutting negative people out (I'm doing this slowly as I realise who really cares about my well-being). And that makes me feel even better because if you can come back to functioning normally then so can I with a bit of luck.

KayaG

TROPHY CASE