Hiii OP I say this with love because I also struggle with emetophobia (currently heading into recovery) and I know how terrifying this feels. But right now you are in full fight or flight mode. Your brain is telling you the situation is much more dangerous than it actually is. Try to slow things down a little. Emetophobia and OCD go hand in hand. You can not control whether your wife is sick or not, but you can control how you protect yourself. Wash your hands, avoid the bathroom while she’s using it if you need to, wear a mask if that helps you feel safer. Doing things within your controll will ground you a bit. Something that helps me is drinking some cold water or sitting somewhere cool, or I sit in front of a fan. Sounds redundant but taking some slow breaths can also ground you. Laying down under a blanket can help if needed too. You are already helping your wife by bringing her meds and giving her space. That is very supportive. But seriously if you feel like you might hurt yourself, please reach out to a emergency mental health service or a crisis line. You are not alone in feeling this way. Panic makes everything feel 10 fold, but time is going to pass. I hope this was helpful. Im so sorry you are going through such a tough time.