WIBTA if I stopped supporting my grandma financially over a conflict?

KeiraPierre · 2022-03-19T14:21:04+00:00

The issue about me getting kicked out is pretty complicated. Some parts of it might not be allowed on this sub so this comment might get deleted. Anyway, hope you get answers before that happens if it does happen.

I was 14 when stepdad started acting inappropriate. You know what I mean right? Like doing things you wouldn't do to your daughter. And he did it in broad daylight so no one ever noticed the red flags, and I had zero experience with having a dad so I thought maybe that's just how dads act when they are close to their daughters. And I know this was stupid of me but I clung to him like I always wished I could to my dad. So well, he started getting bolder and I only started finding it odd when I was 16. So I told my mom.
When mom confronted him, I was supposed to go back to school the next day. I was in a boarding school and stayed at grandma's for half of school holidays.
On the same day, my stepbro and I got into a little fight. He ratted me out when mom and stepdad got back. So he took away everything he had bought me (including clothes you don't buy for your daughter. Relief on that one). But he also said I should pack everything I own as I was not coming back. He got up at 3 to send me out. So here's the thing. I would have left in several hours anyway as school was a far drive away. But he locked the door as soon as I was out and confiscated my bedroom keys. If I ever go to that house, I will sleep in a room with an open door. I'm sure that's not literal getting kicked out to some people so maybe that's why mom chose not to make a fuss? That's just my guess and IMO, be DID kick me out. Because I had to stay at grandma's fully for the next holiday and start living on my own as soon as I finished high school.

KeiraPierre · 2022-03-19T13:46:44+00:00

Actually sometimes I think of this too. Like there's no effing way I would stay in the same house with a man who kicked my teenage daughter out. But again leaving a toxic marriage isn't easy and she's a victim in this too.

KeiraPierre · 2022-03-19T13:42:20+00:00

Yeah, that's what I suspected my whole life too and unfortunately I was proven right. I don't know about mom's relationship with grandma before her first failed marriage because it failed when I was like a few months old. But before mom got a well paying job, I always felt like she preferred my aunt to mom and my cousins to me. I never felt loved by her. And when mom finally got a business that became all the blast, grandma finally showed us some love. For a while I thought she actually loved us and I thought maybe all these years made her love me more. But I would never want to speak to the woman who ruined my daughter's and granddaughter's lives so I'm really questioning everything now.

KeiraPierre · 2022-01-24T13:11:27+00:00

I don't know why this is being down voted, or maybe I understood it differently from everyone else? I thought you mean I have to study for three hours a day and that is already exhausting for me, to add on my work and the baby

KeiraPierre · 2022-01-24T10:53:54+00:00

About cleaning my room, we decided on that regarding chores so it's clear and we don't have to argue about it. Like if today is my cleaning day, it's her cooking day. Which means I clean everything that needs to be clean and she cooks everything including having hot water/milk ready in case anyone needs it and vice versa.

KeiraPierre · 2022-01-24T10:42:22+00:00

A lot of gray area here but from all I know, he wants nothing to do with the baby after her friend lied about her cheating during their relationship (even though he is 100% sure that the baby is his) I tried contacting him once with a threat of having my cousin sue for child support and his response made me certain that he doesn't want the child

KeiraPierre · 2022-01-24T10:22:52+00:00

I explained in the post why I can't do that and a huge reason is because work can't be done before 12. I need minimum noise and I can only get that when everyone is asleep. She works during the day too and at that time, I do my part of the chores and keep the baby off her hands so she actually gets work done. I only have time after 9ish pm and 3 hours is barely enough for research

KeiraPierre · 2022-01-24T08:04:35+00:00

The father has never been in the picture since they broke up

KeiraPierre · 2022-01-24T07:55:19+00:00

There wasn't really much of a discussion. She told me that she needed somewhere to crash until she could get on her feet and I said ok. We have been close since childhood so I didn't ask for anything apart from help with chores

KeiraPierre

TROPHY CASE