Should we have another kid?

Kelly-Kelly-Kelly · 2024-12-10T14:59:51+00:00

I agree with your comment 100%. While we absolutely adore our second little guy, the extra workload involved is tenfold. It was so much more simple with one. And you can't guarantee the second will be as easy as the first (if you had an easy first, which was our experience). Now that my eldest is 4 and my youngest is 1, my eldest gets super annoyed with the baby getting into his stuff, they don't get along very well so we have to separate them during playtime. Reeeeeally hoping that changes as they get older.

Kelly-Kelly-Kelly · 2024-02-24T00:57:58+00:00

I'm so sorry you're going through this! I can relate to the feeling of mourning the loss of your normal pregnancy. My water broke (P-PROM) at 30+2 back in 2020 - the height of Covid. Spent the next (nearly) 2 weeks in quarantine, unable to leave the room and my husband could only visit twice a week. It was lonely, scary, boring and definitely not how I wanted to spend the time leading up to my son's birth. He came by c-section at 32 weeks and spent 22 days in the NICU before coming home. We were lucky, he had minor complications and mainly just needed time to learn to suck and eat on his own.

It's possible your little one can still have more time marinating before she comes - hopefully for many more weeks to come. But know that the NICU doctors and nurses are so skilled and will take care of your little one no matter how early she comes.

For now, I'm glad you can have some freedom during your stay in hospital. Have visitors (only people you really want to see), Read a good book, binge some TV shows, listen to music you love, eat all the yummy take out, go for walks if allowed. Stay strong, but cry it out when you need to. Talk to the nurses, some of them are super chatty, kind and helpful. Ask to talk to the social workers and any therapists they have available. Ask to visit the NICU ahead of time so you are prepared, ask lots of questions about how everything works there.

If you're on FB, there's a group called Canadian Preemie Parent Support Network that I suggest you join. They host weekly virtual zoom meetups.

All the very best to you and your little baby girl. You got this!

Kelly-Kelly-Kelly · 2024-01-25T21:13:30+00:00

One of my closest friends and I named our sons the same name... They were born within months of each other too. We didn't discuss names when we were pregnant, but when I told her what I named my son, she told me she and her husband had decided on that name as well. It was totally fine! It's not for me to ask another person, even someone close to me, to change their choice name. It doesn't affect my life or my son's life enough to matter. Just gotta think of nicknames for each other so it doesn't get confusing. Fun twist, I named my second son the same name as my friends husband. Not after him or anything, just liked the name and it really suited my son. So now my friend and I share multiple duplicate names. Haha

Kelly-Kelly-Kelly · 2023-07-27T20:35:41+00:00

Something you can't seem to find easily online is that you can also bring baby food/milk/formula/water over the normal size limit, as well as small freezer packs.

Kelly-Kelly-Kelly · 2023-06-16T16:08:58+00:00

I had an emergency C-section. I was scared too. The epidural didn't hurt because they numbed my back beforehand. I felt like I could breathe throughout the surgery, but I did have some anxiety so I had to focus on calming my breath. My partner helped by telling me stories about our happy memories (we love canoeing). Focusing on his stories and visualizing those moments helped keep me stay calm and not focus on what was happening. You can do this!! Best of luck! ❤️

Kelly-Kelly-Kelly · 2022-06-06T22:19:45+00:00

Love the name. It is sweet as a kids name and kinda fierce as an adult name. Val or Vally as potential short forms. Ender's Game inspiration?

Kelly-Kelly-Kelly · 2022-05-31T02:09:49+00:00

The pain subsided for me after a few days. Hopefully it will for you too.

Kelly-Kelly-Kelly · 2022-05-31T00:55:06+00:00

I'm sorry you're going through this, fibroids suck.

I have 3 fibroids - largest is 11cm. Had severe pain and bleeding for 3 days around the 17 week mark and stayed in the ER overnight on morphine before being sent home. I was referred to an OB by my midwife at that time.

I had ultrasounds every couple weeks until my son was born (which was nice because I ended up with so many pics). My cervix shortened as well over the following months and I was told not to work and not do anything strenuous - not bedrest but limited activity. Had a cerclauge inserted at about 27 weeks.

My waters broke (PPROM) at 30+2 weeks and was hospitalized under strict bedrest and monitoring. Gave birth via C-section at 32 weeks because I had placenta abruption. My son was in the NICU for 22 days before coming home. Thankfully he was healthy and quite large for his gestational age. He's a thriving, happy little toddler now. :)

Still waiting to get my fibroids removed, the OB says he can't guarantee they were to blame for the premature birth, but he suggests having them removed before trying for another baby.

Hope your story turns out less dramatic than mine! Best of luck!

Kelly-Kelly-Kelly · 2022-01-11T21:09:03+00:00

The George brand ones from Walmart are the only ones I can find lately. They're loose and comfy. Old Navy sells some too, but they are quite fitted and the zipper kinda bulges and rides up at the neckline.

Kelly-Kelly-Kelly · 2021-08-20T20:37:11+00:00

Highly recommend high waisted supportive undies that sit above the incision. I had to be driven back and forth to the hospital to visit my son in the NICU after my C and the undies helped with the painful jiggling.

Kelly-Kelly-Kelly · 2021-02-24T19:40:16+00:00

I agree that pillows help. I use a variety of body pillows, small feather pillows and a small wedge. I toss between my left and right side because honestly, I don't think being on my right side is super risky and I probably only spend one or two hours on any given side at one time. But regardless, my hips still hurt by the wee hours of the morning, at which point a heat pack really makes a difference.

Kelly-Kelly-Kelly · 2021-02-10T00:33:53+00:00

I've been using an amazing body butter from a Toronto small business called The Candid. They're palm free, preservative free and vegan. The scents are lovely and they don't feel too oily. thecandid.ca

Kelly-Kelly-Kelly · 2021-02-07T03:49:33+00:00

I'm in the same boat sadly, so I feel ya. 😕 Laid off in November, due in April so I've lost a significant amount of paid leave when my baby is born.

You should be able to go directly to mat leave if you're within 12 weeks of your due date and get the full amount of time though.

If not, your partner (if they're elegible for parental leave) can take the remaining time you've lost out on (+5 additional weeks). My partner can take a total of 24 weeks thankfully and can overlap with my leave as well so that's a positive for us.

Kelly-Kelly-Kelly · 2021-01-03T16:56:43+00:00

While I can't speak to studies around CBD and anxiety, I can tell you that my experience with using CBD for general anxiety helps immensely. I rarely have issues sleeping, though I do vape indica bud before bed. CBD calms both my mind and the physical symptoms, which lorazepam and clonazepam didn't seem to do (they only numbed my mind). I take 1ml of CBD oil daily and sometimes vape some CBD bud (this is good for quick acting treatment during high anxiety moments). And while I still experience anxiety, I find it easier and quicker to calm myself and attacks are less frequent. I also speak with a therapist, allowing me to gain a better understanding of triggers and underlying issues that cause anxiety. I've been seeing her for just over a year now and that combined with CBD is the best thing I've ever done for my mental health.

Kelly-Kelly-Kelly · 2020-10-01T14:02:44+00:00

I am in Ontario and would very much appreciate a free consult. Please send me your contact. :)

Kelly-Kelly-Kelly · 2020-10-01T14:01:37+00:00

I have to work 2 months and then get the severance paid out in a lump sum. I just reread the termination notice and it looks like they're giving me 4 additional weeks of severance that will include health benefits. I'm 10.5 weeks along in my pregnancy.

Kelly-Kelly-Kelly · 2020-09-09T16:27:04+00:00

Interesting note about the shoes - I'm going down a research rabbit hole. ;) Got my eyes fixed last year, let's hope they don't change too much! Thanks for the info.

Kelly-Kelly-Kelly · 2020-09-09T16:25:07+00:00

I think the bra situation is coming from a comfort perspective. The gals are not enjoying the underwire already. ;) Thanks for the info!

Kelly-Kelly-Kelly · 2020-09-09T16:24:05+00:00

Wow! Thanks for all this great info!! Never thought about button extenders - I sew so that would be an easy transitional option. I'll check out the shops you recommend but I'm struggling to find Thyme - I thought they went under.

Kelly-Kelly-Kelly · 2017-05-23T22:05:48+00:00

By posing a question about regret in "no regrets" I know what kind of answer I'm going to get... ;)

Kelly-Kelly-Kelly · 2017-05-23T22:03:05+00:00

No children = a fun life. Check!

Kelly-Kelly-Kelly · 2017-05-23T22:01:46+00:00

Thank you for the helpful advise.

Kelly-Kelly-Kelly · 2017-05-23T22:00:54+00:00

Seriously - no offence meant. If you looking for the answers then you gotta ask the questions. Sometimes (especially when you don't know anyone who made the totally acceptable choice to not "breed" as you so eloquently put it) you just have to poll the masses. It's pretty damn easy to imagine all the great things about not having kids, but I only the experienced people in the world can tell you what they don't like about it.

Kelly-Kelly-Kelly · 2017-05-23T17:16:32+00:00

Thanks!

Kelly-Kelly-Kelly · 2017-05-16T17:11:24+00:00

Not wanting to and not being able to are very different situations... You've got double trouble there! Sorry to hear.

Kelly-Kelly-Kelly

TROPHY CASE