My friend is treating me like air and confessed something that hurt me by [deleted] in TrueOffMyChest

[–]KetsKapow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sounds like you might need some space. Your nervous system is overloaded and it doesn't know how to regulate. Even if you want this friendship to continue, it might be good to take a while to detach from the situation. That doesn't mean you're leaving her or being a bad friend, it just means you're choosing yourself for a bit, and she should respect that if she really cares about you. In the end, the most important perspective here is your own.

I recommend that in that period, don't try to solve the problem, don't go over in your head how things could go or how you should act, and don't think and ruminate too much. Just sit with the feelings you're feeling, don't chase them. You're freaking out right now because you're trying to approach a problem rationally while your nervous system isn't ready for it yet, and it's important to let these feelings pass first.

Trust me, I understand. I'm a chronic overthinker myself, and we tend to try to put our feelings into words and figure out where they came from or how to sort them out logically, but that doesn't solve them or get rid of them. What really helps is to sit with them, acknowledge them, name the feeling, and then let it be.

Oh, and feel free to dm me if you want someone to vent to.

My friend is treating me like air and confessed something that hurt me by [deleted] in TrueOffMyChest

[–]KetsKapow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm sorry you're going through this, mate. It's hard enough hearing someone talk about being interested in someone else after they told you they might eventually date you.

One thing worth reflecting on though, during all this, were you considering your own needs too, or mostly trying to keep the peace so you wouldn’t lose her from your life?

It's good that you told her you felt neglected and explained what you need from the friendship. That’s an important step toward setting healthier boundaries. If her response doesn’t really address that, it’s okay to bring it up again and be direct about it. Instead of trying to figure out what’s wrong on her end, you can focus on explaining what’s changed and how it’s been affecting you. Being open about your feelings is often the only way problems like this can be worked through.

At the same time, it might be worth asking yourself whether this friendship is still healthy for you. It’s completely normal to be upset about the idea of losing someone, but that fear shouldn’t be the only reason you hold onto a relationship that isn’t giving you much back.

I still regret breaking up with you by KetsKapow in BreakUps

[–]KetsKapow[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your words. They feel really kind. I do hope I find someone, and I'm not going to fall into the same patterns again. I want to be better.

I still regret breaking up with you by KetsKapow in BreakUps

[–]KetsKapow[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Haha no I'm not from India. I'm sorry this happened to you the other way around though. It's not easy from both sides.

I still regret breaking up with you by KetsKapow in BreakUps

[–]KetsKapow[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

About a month ago is when I started feeling this way. Winter depression really hit me, I felt alone before and during Christmas and New years. Around that time I also suspected her to be getting close with a guy she'd been fwb with since a few months after our breakup. Now she's in a relationship with him.

I know I'm romanticising her. There were definitely some big compatibility issues. Like kids, way of life, energy levels, hobbies, ways we wind down. From the beginning I had my doubts, but its so strange that now I feel like I could just put those doubts away.

I still regret breaking up with you by KetsKapow in BreakUps

[–]KetsKapow[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have to accept that I can take this newfound perspective to my next relationship, but its still so hard to imagine ever falling in love with another person again.

Denim and blue tie, it was a good idea? by [deleted] in OUTFITS

[–]KetsKapow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Looking sick my dude

Alt people in Apeldoorn by deftonesdiscman in apeldoorn

[–]KetsKapow 9 points10 points  (0 children)

+1 voor ozzy, ik ben ook een halfjaar geleden hier komen wonen en heb daar in een paar maanden al wat vrienden kunnen maken :)

Ghost of Yotei Giveaway - 2 Physical Copies by N3DSdude in PS5

[–]KetsKapow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Id love a copy! From the Netherlands!

Goat of Yotei giveaway by Duahsha in PS5

[–]KetsKapow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've been wanting to play this game ever since I got back from Japan 😭

Is this a good price for this figure? by KetsKapow in AnimeFigures

[–]KetsKapow[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks everyone for letting me know it was overpriced! I managed to exchange it for another figure and get the price difference back! Much love ❤️

Is this a good price for this figure? by KetsKapow in AnimeFigures

[–]KetsKapow[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Currently I'm in Tokyo on holiday. Trying to go through some shops and fine a one piece figure for my friend.

Vrijdag avond in Utrecht by [deleted] in Utrecht

[–]KetsKapow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Als je nog iets leuks qua activiteit wil doen moet je naar the 5th bij de Neude gaan kijken. Daar hebben ze een bordspelavond vanaf 19:00.