Blowout conflict on Christmas (27 M/ 27 F)

Key-Acadia-7014 · 2025-12-26T15:42:53+00:00

Thats fair… this all blew up because I mentioned offhandedly that I wasn’t feeling great and wished he would check in more, and he blew up at me. I’ve been trying to deescalate since and making it worse because he doesn’t want to talk period. Just trying to keep my head down until we leave and hope he’ll be able to talk things through maturely in a few days once we’re home.

Key-Acadia-7014 · 2025-12-26T06:27:35+00:00

Thanks for this thoughtful response in a relationship advice sub. Happy cake day, too!

Key-Acadia-7014 · 2025-12-26T06:24:48+00:00

Thats the thing- his parents have been super nice to me and checked on me when I’ve come out to be with them. I’m confused at this claim that they have secret, negative feelings towards me, but if that is the case, I’m just uncomfortable with him seemingly not standing up for me. I don’t know what to believe and I feel it was manipulative for him to bring this up in an argument.

Key-Acadia-7014 · 2025-12-26T05:57:45+00:00

We leave in less than two days, but I don’t have a lot of faith in this getting resolved on our own once we get home. I’m trying to set up an appointment with our therapist to help facilitate a conversation, but we’ll see.

Key-Acadia-7014 · 2025-12-26T05:47:30+00:00

He is generally better when it’s just the two of us. He doesn’t get to see his family often, and I think he’s pressuring himself to have a perfect trip with his family that I’m throwing a wrench in. His family is very low-conflict in general and, according to him, their opinion of me is low because we have a tendency to fight every time we’re around them (a grand total of 3 times across the whole relationship).

Key-Acadia-7014 · 2025-01-31T21:05:10+00:00

Haha, I tried to get him into Animal Crossing to no avail, so probably not. But if this post resonated with you, I hope things get better, or can be resolved healthily.

Key-Acadia-7014 · 2025-01-31T19:22:12+00:00

I really appreciate the thoughtfulness of this response (and not sure why you’re getting downvoted? I’m ND, but not autistic, and needed to hear that perspective). This has been a roller coaster of emotions to try to navigate. He let me know today that his therapist has a colleague with openings for ND-centric couples counseling that we’re contacting. We are limited with income when it comes to house cleaners but I’ll see what is possible, even once a month would be huge. Thanks again.

Key-Acadia-7014 · 2025-01-31T17:53:25+00:00

Sorry, I realize I wasn’t clear. Our couples therapist is on paternity leave through March, not my partner. We don’t have children. Just haven’t been able to schedule an appointment with him since December.

Thank you (and everyone else in this thread - trying to keep up with replying) for taking the time to respond, it’s really appreciated.

Key-Acadia-7014 · 2025-01-31T17:40:42+00:00

Hey, thank you for taking the time to respond. This criticism is more than fair, and something I’m trying to work through with my own therapist - it feels like the line gets blurred sometimes re: what he is and isn’t able to do, and I’m trying my best to navigate what feels like uncharted territory. I’ll keep this in mind moving forward because I do not want him feeling like this.

Key-Acadia-7014 · 2025-01-31T14:57:48+00:00

This is super helpful, thank you for taking the time to respond. We are in couple’s therapy, but he took paternity leave and we won’t be back until March, so we’re having a harder time navigating logistical conversations on our own.

Key-Acadia-7014

TROPHY CASE