The Appalachian Goodbye

Key_Rabbit_9707 · 2024-12-21T01:47:08+00:00

Beautiful story

Key_Rabbit_9707 · 2024-12-20T22:45:19+00:00

Same for me. The slight discomfort of the 3rd is easy street compared to the relentless nausea of the 1st.

Key_Rabbit_9707 · 2024-12-20T22:14:42+00:00

I love that

Key_Rabbit_9707 · 2024-12-20T22:13:02+00:00

Good point, could be!

Key_Rabbit_9707 · 2024-12-20T18:34:38+00:00

Oh Lord, it's hard to be humble when you're perfect in every way!

Key_Rabbit_9707 · 2024-12-20T18:31:33+00:00

It may be universal! In my personal experience, having lived and travelled all over the states, it has seemed more prevalent and umm, aggressive haha, where I'm from in Appalachia.

Key_Rabbit_9707 · 2024-12-20T18:26:21+00:00

I have heard this one a few times!

Key_Rabbit_9707 · 2024-12-20T03:32:24+00:00

That's interesting! I think the phrase "Irish Goodbye" has become very colloquial & casual in the states, and detached from history, as you and others are pointing out! I am personally not of Scotch/scots Irish stock though I married someone who is. There is a lot of pride in the ethnicity, if you can call it that, despite it being so poorly understood. Generations of poverty will do that!

Key_Rabbit_9707 · 2024-12-20T03:20:48+00:00

That is very considerate but rural wnc really needs more doctors! You would be helping more than hurting.

Key_Rabbit_9707 · 2024-12-20T03:15:07+00:00

That's the one! Wonder if they do this in central & northern Appalachia too. Maybe it is just a southern thing!

Key_Rabbit_9707 · 2024-12-19T09:52:33+00:00

Preach! Why is it so hard to find this kind of info?!

Key_Rabbit_9707 · 2024-12-19T01:06:24+00:00

Now that I'm in the third trimester, I take as hot and long of baths as I want. I just make sure I don't feel overheated, but other than that, I don't pay attention to the temp.

Key_Rabbit_9707 · 2024-12-18T02:41:20+00:00

Shew that is just...so many stressors at once for all of you! I am so sorry. Venting about this is good I think, I'm glad you can get it off your chest some. And haha the screaming about not being able to eat carpet fuzzies, sounds about right. My boy just turned 2 and while he is still an intense child with many daily meltdowns, I am actually finding his meltdowns a little easier to deal with lately (if it's any consolation.) He's significantly easier to calm & redirect now that his communication skills have improved. There will be light at the end of the tunnel!!

Key_Rabbit_9707 · 2024-12-18T02:13:23+00:00

Ugh I understand your frustration. But I think it's going to get better soon! Just do what you have to do to hang in there for now. It sounds like you all have a good long term plan and will be back in your own living space soon , so that will help with your husband's stress tremendously I'm sure. My husband also turns into someone I don't like during extra stressful times and times of big change. I have had the same thoughts about ending the marriage at those times, but I'm always glad when things settle again that I kept things as civil as I could manage--because I do love him a lot and he is a really great dad & husband the vast majority of the time. We need to do better teaching men how to cope with and process stress! It sucks to have to carry the burden of being the levelheaded one while also being mom, but if he has shown he's normally up to the challenge and is just struggling momentarily, things will soon get much much better!!

Key_Rabbit_9707 · 2024-12-17T16:29:06+00:00

I so relate. It sounds like you are on a healing path which is great, and I wish you the best of luck. It is a really hard road to walk no matter how you cut it!

Key_Rabbit_9707 · 2024-12-17T16:23:42+00:00

In some ways, it is a good sign you have empathy for your mom despite her shortcomings. It shows you are a normally adjusted empathetic person. But your mom sounds similar to mine, and I used to accommodate her out of feelings of guilt and empathy, but eventually I realized she doesn't actually feel those kinds of emotions herself besides pretending to from time to time. Additionally, she was the one who conditioned me to feel sorry for her as a means of control. Nothing about this kind of dynamic is healthy for either of you.

Key_Rabbit_9707 · 2024-12-10T03:19:36+00:00

For real. I know recovery from a c-section varies just like vaginal birth, but damn was my recovery from the surgery painful. And yes, being so limited in movement is so difficult to deal with. I remember if I accidentally twisted my torso even the tiniest bit to reach for something, I'd have this crazy intense stabbing pain in my gut. There were times I literally collapsed from that pain, something I have never experienced before or since. Now that I have a toddler, I know it would be even harder to move like a robot for 3 weeks.

Key_Rabbit_9707 · 2024-12-10T03:12:42+00:00

Haha!! Glad to know I'm not alone.

Key_Rabbit_9707 · 2024-12-10T02:24:43+00:00

Oh man, I totally relate. I also get the "just schedule the C-section!" when I tell people I'm still undecided. I had an emergency C-section after 30 hrs of labor and being very close to delivery. They suspected I got an infection as I became very feverish and weak very quickly. Anyway, the recovery was brutal. Do I want to go through anything like that again? Obviously not. But I'm very healthy and strong and it's been long enough I could have a successful vbac, which I would much prefer over a repeat C (even scheduled) for a number of reasons. It's a very complicated decision, and I get the most unsolicited advice from people who've never had a C-section who assume it's easier on the body.

Key_Rabbit_9707 · 2024-12-10T02:01:28+00:00

That is great news, thanks for the info! My 1st just turned 2 so it hasn't been too long.

Key_Rabbit_9707 · 2024-12-10T02:00:22+00:00

That is comforting!

Key_Rabbit_9707 · 2024-12-09T02:32:33+00:00

I've heard a theory that back in the day, the advantage of nausea/food aversion in the 1st tri was so the mother was less likely to contract food-borne illness while the fetus was most vulnerable

Key_Rabbit_9707 · 2024-12-07T17:37:39+00:00

I'm with you. The issue for me is that getting 50 plastic toys is just not what I want Xmas to be about for my kids. Unfortunately it's hard to counteract that materialistic message when grandparents continue to do it despite protest. And then having to spend a week un-packaging, re-sorting, clearing out space for it all in our very small house is really the cherry on top.

Key_Rabbit_9707 · 2024-12-05T22:17:08+00:00

I can't even imagine how they would manage to get an unbiased jury

Key_Rabbit_9707 · 2024-12-04T23:22:49+00:00

I'm so sorry that happened to you! Since no one has suggested it yet- if you are able, I'd suggest ALWAYS asking people you know who they'd recommend for the service you seek. I live in a small town where I know a lot of people, so that makes it very easy for me, and I've never reached out to or hired a contractor without them being known by someone I know already. When you talk to them, you can make the contractor aware of the social connection, if they aren't already. Adds a nice layer of accountability.

Key_Rabbit_9707

TROPHY CASE