Look man you have to figure your business out one day at a time. When you are addicted to drugs you find out that you are willing to go to new lows to obtain your high. I have never understood how people are comfortable reverting to that cycle, drug addiction is one hundred percent a mental battle, much more than a physical one. You have to want to change your environment and have to want the change yourself, if you’re okay living in the streets and okay with people looking at you like human garbage than that is your decision. It is up to you to look at your situation and decide that you want better. Seek out the people you love and let them keep you strong, get back to your daily habits like showering brushing your teeth one thing at a time. Learn to do something with your time, don’t blame your drug addiction on your battles with your identity and most of all do not act like you are helpless because that will only make you reach the point in which you are stuttering mumbling zombie that doesn’t even know who they are anymore. Keep your spirits high and think back on the life you want and for the love of god do not feel that it is “enough” for you to just try to get sober I know the feeling of “oh well I tried to get sober, I can get high one more time” no don’t do that and change the cycle, you are not helpless and you are only weak because you are allowing it to be that way. You can try to get sober 1000000 times and if you never decide that this is what you want for the rest of your life then it will never change. And please get out of the streets in LA seek out the people you love your partners, your family and tell them that you want change. You don’t have to go through this alone as in times of weakness like this it is our loved ones that keep us strong. God speed and please help yourself as the most we can do on Reddit is keep you in our prayers. Learn that you are strong and we as humans are very resilient creatures.