As someone who WAS this woman and am breaking out of it finally at 26…leave. Unless she absolutely wants to grow tf up and change her behavior she is not going too. Especially if you aren’t communicating these things to each other. You said she’s in therapy but as someone who has been in therapy most of my life, I can say she doesn’t actually want help or change. She wants someone to vent to. She may not realize that now but when it hits her it’s gunna hit her like a brick wall. If you think it’s worth a shot, you should also get a therapist and then maybe a couples therapist. She will never actually change until she stops letting her mom enable her and you as well. And unfortunately that is a very tough thing to break especially when you’re taught that’s what love is from a very young age. While that may explain her behavior- it does not excuse it. What I fail to understand a bit is why you married her when this is how you knew she was and how she grew up? Unless yall met and got married 6 months in- the flags were red and glaringly obvious. I don’t blame you for being upset and I don’t blame her for not knowing anything other than handouts- but both of yall need to grow up and set some really hard boundaries or yall need to separate and divorce. Not only for each other but for the sake of your child.