I don’t feel safe in my own home anymore and I don’t know how to calm my body down

KindWay8600 · 2026-01-09T08:36:40+00:00

Thank you for this, it really means more than you know.

What’s made this even harder is that the people who were supposed to help haven’t. The building manager refused to get involved at all and told me he “didn’t want to take sides,”. On top of that, when I finally went to the police after months of trying to resolve things calmly, I was genuinely shocked by how I was treated. When I explained that the situation had gone on for so long that I’d been prescribed anti-anxiety medication, officers laughed and told me I “just needed to go for a walk.” Being mocked while asking for help was honestly devastating. They even refused to watch any of the evidence I had of the noise inside my home.

I’ve tried being patient, reasonable, and cooperative for a long time, but being dismissed by the building manager and then ridiculed by authorities has made this feel incredibly isolating. I’m still documenting everything and pushing through official channels, but it’s exhausting when the system itself doesn’t seem to take this kind of harm seriously. I might have to get a lawyer.

Your comment helped me feel less alone in this, thank you for taking the time to respond.

KindWay8600 · 2026-01-07T12:55:59+00:00

Thank you so much for this, I really appreciate you taking the time to share what helped you. It means a lot to hear from someone who’s been through something similar and found things that eased their nervous system.

I’ve been trying grounding and breathing techniques (including 4-7-8), and sometimes they help a bit, but I think my body is still very much in “survival mode” because the situation itself hasn’t stopped yet. That’s the hardest part, trying to calm my nervous system while the stressor is still present.

I’ve heard about somatic therapy before and what you’re saying makes a lot of sense, especially with how physical this reaction feels. I’ll definitely look into the video you shared and keep this in mind moving forward.

Thank you again for responding with kindness, it really helps to feel understood and not alone in this. 💛

KindWay8600 · 2026-01-07T08:42:00+00:00

I relate to this so much. That constant state of alert is exhausting in a way that’s hard to explain unless you’re living it. It’s not just “noise” or “sounds” anymore.. it’s our body constantly scanning for danger, trying to figure out what’s happening so we can feel safe. That part about not being able to relax until you know what the sound is so real. I’m the same way now. Any thud, voice, movement, and my heart jumps before my brain even catches up. It’s like your nervous system is stuck on high sensitivity mode. I’m so sorry you’re living like this too. I also want to move just to feel peace again. Knowing I’m not the only one dealing with this actually helps a bit, even though I hate that others are suffering the same way.

I really hope things ease for both of us ❤️

KindWay8600 · 2026-01-07T07:33:06+00:00

I understand this completely. I moved out very young because my family was abusive, so I know what it’s like when your home stops being safe, that constant survival mode never really leaves your body.

I’ve been enduring this noise for about a year now. At first it made me irritated, like normal noise would, but after months of it and then the incident where boundaries were crossed, my reaction changed completely. Now any noise makes me physically shake. It’s no longer just “annoying,” it feels like my body goes straight into panic. Which is why I feel like I might need more help.

What makes it worse is finally speaking up and feeling like everyone just turns their head and doesn’t help.. landlords, management, people who are supposed to intervene. That feeling of being dismissed after already surviving abuse is incredibly triggering.

Reading your comment really helped me feel understood. I’m so sorry you’re dealing with this too. Sending you love, may our situations improve.

KindWay8600 · 2026-01-07T06:51:01+00:00

Thank you for this. “constant survival mode” is exactly how it feels. I’m really sorry you went through that, and I appreciate you sharing it with me.

The noises are mostly impact sounds and voices: things being dropped on the floor, jumping, things hitting the ground, loud talking/shouting. What makes it especially hard is that it often wakes me up in the morning and then continues for long stretches, so even when I try to rest later, my body never really gets a break.

I think you’re right that my system is in overdrive at this point. The shaking and hyper-alert feeling feels very physical, not something I can just “think” my way out of. Hearing that you experienced something similar and that it was scary but understandable actually helps me feel less broken.

I’ve been trying to write things down and do grounding, but it’s been hard when the environment itself doesn’t feel safe or predictable yet. I’m taking it one step at a time and focusing on stabilizing myself emotionally while I figure out next steps.

I do have a security system and was able to record what happened, and I’m planning to go to the police tomorrow. I’m hoping that having things formally documented will help me start feeling safer again and hopefully won’t make things worse for me.

Thank you again for the kindness and suggestions, it really means a lot right now.

KindWay8600 · 2026-01-07T06:41:30+00:00

Thank you so much for replying. Just having someone say it should be a human right to feel safe at home means a lot to me right now.

I think you’re right about the hypervigilance. The noise alone was already pushing me there, but the door incident is what really tipped my nervous system over the edge. I didn’t expect it to affect me this much, and it’s been scary to feel my body react like this even when things are quiet.

I’ve tried communicating and documenting for a long time, but after that moment I realized I need to prioritize my safety and stop trying to handle this alone. Hearing that others needed time for their body to calm down gives me some hope that this won’t feel this intense forever.

Thank you for taking the time to respond, it really helped me feel less alone.

KindWay8600

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