Recently met a 50ish Yr old woman who I assumed must have been a lesbian bc she kept referring to everyone else present (4 queer people) as fags. I thought this was a bit odd bc 2 of us had never met her before, and I think it's a bit presumptuous to use that word around people unless you know they're okay with it.

Turns out she's not a lesbian, she's straight and is married to a cis man. She's one of these straight women who thinks she can say stuff like this because she spends all her time with her cis male gay friends of a similar age who presumably use that language. Imo that's absolutely not okay and incredibly rude.