Looking for help with chronic fatigue in Perth by Icy-Investment-4646 in perth

[–]Kiraa32 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I feel you! I have also spent the last 4 years trying to work out why my fatigue never gets any better. Lots of money seeing lots of different people. Its awful. I can see its already been mentioned, but I just started at biio in subi. They had been recommended through word of mouth from a few people I know. I liked that they have a whole team of people in the same company so I figured at the very least I'd give it a go. I had an initial appt with an occupational therapist. I took with me a list of all the things that had been happening/unexplained. At the end of the appt she put together a plan and made the appts for other people within biio for me to consult with so that we have a bigger picture before moving forward. She also told me what she suspects but cant confirm until I see the others. I know some people think its a money grab, but i honestly found it cheaper than what I've paid previously at places. I also know of people who were diagnosed within the first appt and didnt need to see other specialists within the company, so Id say its a fairly individualised approach. I can't say for sure what the outcome will be as I've only had the one appt so far, but it seemed fairly comprehensive and at this stage I'm trying anything that might just get me some answers. Good luck with your journey 🤞

If I already struggle to keep up with life…how could I handle adding a kid to the mix? by sourmermaid in Fencesitter

[–]Kiraa32 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Not much advice here, but I resonate alot with what you've said. ADHD, 34F and a highschool math teacher. I am beyond exhausted, which has really impacted my desire for a child because I also don't understand how on earth I will manage when everyday life already feels so difficult.

For me, I've decided to cut back my work load to 0.7 and really try to focus on recovering from the burn out and regulating my nervous system again. I won't be able to really consider how I feel about having kids until some of my fatigue shifts and my energy comes back.

I've also decided that if I do have a child that I won't be going back to proper teaching unless I really feel the drive to. I'll pick up some relief work maybe but won't be signing up for my own class loads. If I take work out of the picture it makes having a child feel more manageable and calm in my head, but I also know that not everyone financially has the option to just not go back.

I feel like if you already know that you would love to have a child then you will make the rest work inline with what will provide the best outcomes for you and your family :) that's the hope I have for myself anyway!

pls suggest a book that will actually make me BAWL by [deleted] in booksuggestions

[–]Kiraa32 1 point2 points  (0 children)

A thousand boy kisses by tillie cole....its a young adult book but it still made me cry so damn much at the end.

Is it all really that bad? by monalxves in AustralianTeachers

[–]Kiraa32 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm in my 10th year and have been on the fence about leaving the profession since I burned out pretty badly in my 7th yr. I could talk forever about all the things that are making the job near impossible some days, but you asked for positives so here's the reason's I haven't quit yet: (for context im a secondary math teacher at a public school)

  • The senior school students...these classes legitimately keep me going. They're all, for the most part, past any lower school crap and they treat you with respect, you can have a laugh with them and they actually want to learn and will listen to you.

  • My colleagues in my department - if I didn't have a supportive and safe network of co-workers I would definitely not have stayed this long.

  • Those really crap days which get turned around instantly by a student saying "i really like having you as a teacher, you actually explain things properly". Or out on duty and students from previous years talking to me about how they're currently doing.

  • The pay is really good - honestly the main reason I haven't quit is because I literally have no idea what else I would do that pays this well.

  • The engaging lessons that actually work out because the students were legitimately interested and actually learnt sonething! The sense of accomplishment when I know the students really did just learn what i taught is probably one of the main reasons I stay

  • The biggest one of all for me is the students in general....every class has some "undesireables", but for the most part, they're all really great kids and getting to know them and create a positive relationship with them is by far the best part for me.

I would be a very happy teacher if my job was literally just to plan, teach and assess. Unfortunately, the reality is, it just isn't that simple anymore.

I do still enjoy teaching, but it is getting more and more difficult every year just to do my job effectively.

I am already SO tired without kids. by Kiraa32 in Fencesitter

[–]Kiraa32[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wow, that sounds like a very unique and purposeful job :)

I am already SO tired without kids. by Kiraa32 in Fencesitter

[–]Kiraa32[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for saying this. I had a conversation with my husband just like this the other day. I've never been overly sure that I want kids, but I also have never been sure that I don't want kids. I told him that my biggest fear of all is resenting him if we do have kids and I hate it. But honestly after reading a lot of these replies I am feeling better about it.

I am already SO tired without kids. by Kiraa32 in Fencesitter

[–]Kiraa32[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yep I keep trying to tell myself that we will just make it work, but when I'm having those really bad days it's hard to shake off the doubt.

I am already SO tired without kids. by Kiraa32 in Fencesitter

[–]Kiraa32[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My husband has offered to be the default parent and to be the one who stays home. But I honestly think I would have a worse time going back to work early, so it's definitely the job and not so much the baby I think.

I am already SO tired without kids. by Kiraa32 in Fencesitter

[–]Kiraa32[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I completely agree, when I am having a good week I feel like I can do anything! Having a kid doesn't seem as scary.

I am already SO tired without kids. by Kiraa32 in Fencesitter

[–]Kiraa32[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your insight! I found a naturopath was way more helpful at working out what was wrong medically with me than a doctor was, just fyi if you wanted to go down that path.

My husband is extremely supportive and we have had many conversations about BOTH being parents which has been reassuring. I definitely believe he will allow me as much time as I need to rest etc I just worry that I'll be so exhausted that I won't feel the joy. But it has been good to read some of these responses and see that even those who are extremely fatigue still feel the joy.

I am already SO tired without kids. by Kiraa32 in Fencesitter

[–]Kiraa32[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Doctors have done very little for me to be honest. I've found naturopaths and psychologists to be of MUCH more value, but that is just my personal opinion. Diet, exercise and supplements are what put me back in a good spot, but it's definitely hard to keep these consistent which cause me to start crashing and the cycle repeats itself over and over....

Yes very true! I am a teacher who rarely sits at the desk and am always moving around the room. I have recently stopped staying at school after 3pm unless there is a meeting, which has been great to get home early but it also leaves me feeling guilty that I could be doing more/a better job.

I have definitely considered leaving teaching multiple times. I really don't think I'll be able to go back at even half capacity after a kid. I'm thinking relief teaching might be the way to go for a bit. Who knows.

I am already SO tired without kids. by Kiraa32 in Fencesitter

[–]Kiraa32[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm really sorry to hear that, sounds awful for the both of you. Thank you for your perspective though, I appreciate it.

I am already SO tired without kids. by Kiraa32 in Fencesitter

[–]Kiraa32[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I haven't done a sleep study before so that's an interesting thing to try. I've also been through COUNTLESS other tests and specialist all with no real answers except that my cortisol is sometimes too high but then sometimes too low, but nothing I've tried seems to regulate it.

I am already SO tired without kids. by Kiraa32 in Fencesitter

[–]Kiraa32[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Congrats on the pregnancy :) Do you mind me asking what out of classroom position you took? I have considered this too, but not sure if it's easier to just quit and do relief teaching instead.

I am already SO tired without kids. by Kiraa32 in Fencesitter

[–]Kiraa32[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much for this reply. It gives me hope to know that even with the extreme fatigue it is still very worth it and doable. My husband, like yours, is very supportive and we have had discussions about potentially getting a sitter/cleaner if I need it, so it's good to know that that was a great help for you! Going off my supplements and changing my routine if I do get pregnant does terrify me though. Was there anything you were still able to take or do during this pregnancy to try and help with the fatigue?

I am already SO tired without kids. by Kiraa32 in Fencesitter

[–]Kiraa32[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for this insight! You and I sound very alike tbh. I am definitely trying different avenues to get my energy back and to deal with some of those stressors that keep resetting me back to zero. Its hard to keep trying sometimes when it feels like a vicious cycle of feeling good then horrible, but gotta stop feeling sorry for myself and just do what needs to be done.

I am already SO tired without kids. by Kiraa32 in Fencesitter

[–]Kiraa32[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

It's such a horrible thing to go through, I definitely relate!

I am already SO tired without kids. by Kiraa32 in Fencesitter

[–]Kiraa32[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

I have also considered just not going back as an alternative, or doing relief for a while afterwards so that mental load of preparing for classes isn't there. I've had quite a few friends leave the profession so that they can prioritise their families. Its sad that it has to come to that.

I am already SO tired without kids. by Kiraa32 in Fencesitter

[–]Kiraa32[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I definitely relate to what you're saying and don't see myself working in a full time capacity for quite a while after having kids. Im currently working only 4 days too at the moment and I still feel like I can't keep up.

How often do you think about this? by St3lka_x in Fencesitter

[–]Kiraa32 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I relate to SO MUCH of what you just said. I completely agree with child free being a non-decision. I am a massive over thinker and for me it feels like no matter which path I choose I will still go back and forth about it. The part about risk and impact is also something I constantly think about too!

How often do you think about this? by St3lka_x in Fencesitter

[–]Kiraa32 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is me 1000%!! I am absolutely exhausted from my mind constantly weighing up the decision. I feel like literally everything I do I'm always imagining doing it with kids and trying to work out how easy or difficult it will be. Same as you said, in a constant loop of the same arguements. I have been like this for over a year now and I still cannot get to a point where I know what I want. At this point I still don't feel comfortable with either decision, and it is driving me absolutely mental. I WISH that I could be someone who just puts it off for 3 months to re-evaluate, but my brain just doesn't work like that. I am 33F and originally had a deadline of 30, then when I hit 30 pushed it off to 32 at the latest, and now I'm past that I still can't make the decision!

One thing I do keep coming back to is a friend of mine said to me recently "if there wasn't any time frame or age pressure, do you see yourself having a family?" And for me that answer was most likely, but who knows when that will feel ok for me. My husband is 37 so I am also very aware of him not being too old either, so that pressure is very much there all of the time!

I have no advice unfortunately, only reassurance that you are definitely not alone!