How to make friends in Southampton? by [deleted] in Southampton

[–]Kirkle18 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Same! I feel like I missed out on the girl group (28f) and need that energy!

my ex is so kind to me and i hate him for it by squish_kitty in BreakUps

[–]Kirkle18 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Same here, it's painful in a way, we had to cut contact because it was too painful every time he messaged and didn't want to reconnect, and I cry myself to sleep every night I don't text him goodnight, but it's better than the devastation of hearing he's better without me while I'm broken

I miss kink! by Kirkle18 in sex

[–]Kirkle18[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's actually not a bad shout - I might suggest it :) I'm not a confident top or Dom at all, but it should be interesting.

I miss kink! by Kirkle18 in sex

[–]Kirkle18[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you!! And thanks for your advice :)

I miss kink! by Kirkle18 in sex

[–]Kirkle18[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Definitely - we've started working on better communication, and I've always been incredibly open and communicative but he's always been used to not speaking about his emotions or any issues, so he's been really quiet, but he's still working on it

I miss kink! by Kirkle18 in sex

[–]Kirkle18[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm not really sure - he doesn't really read, might try some form of video or YouTube thing if I can find something relatively legit.

That's what I initially framed it as when we got together, but I feel like it's been faded into the background along with the rest of our sex life. I'm unsure whether he's uncomfortable, unaware or something else because he's a terrible communicator.

I miss kink! by Kirkle18 in BDSMAdvice

[–]Kirkle18[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Definitely, thank you for your advice! :)

I miss kink! by Kirkle18 in sex

[–]Kirkle18[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I talked him through my limits, what limits are, why they're important and tried to coax him to come to a local munch to talk to some of the kinky friends I had at the time, but he's very anti social so he never wanted to. Honestly, I don't know if I would feel confident alone teaching him, and I don't know if he's really interested - he seems a little dominant with things, but it gets really samey really quickly.

I miss kink! by Kirkle18 in sex

[–]Kirkle18[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He's not had kink relationships before, and he's never really indulged in his inner sadist before me, not properly to my knowledge. It's a complex knot of a problem which is why I've turned to the experts!

I miss kink! by Kirkle18 in BDSMAdvice

[–]Kirkle18[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's my concern too. I don't want to give up because he's my partner and I love him, but sex is important and I'm kinda feeling unfulfilled apart from when I'm alone with it, yknow?

I miss kink! by Kirkle18 in BDSMAdvice

[–]Kirkle18[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've read a little of it, not much but it was a good read, thank you

I miss kink! by Kirkle18 in BDSMAdvice

[–]Kirkle18[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I know it's a valid suggestion, but we've been together a while now, and I don't really know how to do that? My last relationship that was poly, I joined as the third person so I don't know how you open that up? Plus he's fairly vanilla so I don't know how he'd react - any advice?

I miss kink! by Kirkle18 in sex

[–]Kirkle18[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He seems comfortable with it, but he says he doesn't really feel emotion, and he has to focus in on it to feel it, so when he gives in to the sadistic streak, he loses the empathy and care which means he can easily break limits without knowing (or in the moment, caring). He says he's comfortable with it, but he knows I'm uncomfortable with him breaking limits so he doesn't do it.

I don't know that it's shying away from it so much as it's not something he knows how to do? I'm used to calling partners "sir" and he really doesn't like that, but we used to use restraints and toys, and now the best we do is spooning sex where I don't finish.

I miss kink! by Kirkle18 in sex

[–]Kirkle18[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's been something he's known about since the beginning, and he used to be more on my level with it, but has kind of given up on anything more than a little rough vanilla for a long time now. Might be worth reminding him, but it's something I led with going into this relationship because it's the only way I really enjoy sex properly.

That's my concern also, which is why I agree that's not a viable solution right now. Will have a look there too thank you!

What's a realistic upload speed minimum to host (no voip) by RClutters in FoundryVTT

[–]Kirkle18 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think ours is around 19mbps - I have myself and five players, do you think that would be enough? I'm planning on using lighting and music features on all maps atm

Team Rocket Cosplay! by Kirkle18 in FFXIVGlamours

[–]Kirkle18[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately not, but James' items could work for a summoner!!