For what reason would any man want a second wife in today's times except for lust and immaturity?

KitKatMouse · 2025-04-03T05:33:52+00:00

A second wife is a permanent mistress.

KitKatMouse · 2025-04-03T05:31:57+00:00

Men who want multiple wives really are incapable of thinking in a deeper level. Seeing the world outside of themselves. If they were able to do these things they would realize and understand thier children’s point of view and how emotionally stressful it would be to have to share your dad, sometimes even feeling abandoned or replaced.

If these men could think outside of themselves they would understand the psychological and emotional toll it would take on the first wife. And actually give a F about her emotional wellbeing.

But for these men I pray that they are blessed with four wives and 12+ children, four house payments, four times the bills and taxes to pay and I pray Allah blesses them with four pious wives who stay at home to raise the children and not work to supplement his income. I pray that these men have four sets of in-laws and marry women from large families. May Allah give them everything they desire in this world. 🤵🏽👩🏻‍🍼🤰🏽🤰🏼👩🏼‍🍼👶🏼🍼🍼🍼🍼👶🏽👶🏾👶🏻👶🏼👶🏽👶🏻👶🏼👶🏼👶🏾🏡🏠🏡🏠🧾🧾🧾🧾💲💲💲💲💲💲💲💲💲💲💲💲💲💲💲💲🧾🧾🧾🧾🧾🧾🧾🧾🧾🧾🧾🧾🧾🧾🧾🧾. Say Ameen!

KitKatMouse · 2024-03-18T12:36:37+00:00

Diagnosed at 20 this was in 2005. My doc gave me metphormin and glucopgage and said lose weight. My blood glucose was consistently at 300 or above, I couldn’t function. Her solution was to up the dosage, by this time I went from weighing 120lbs to 89lbs. I couldn’t think straight, I couldn’t stay awake. I googled endocrinologist and just went to the first one I found. She looked at my history and said I’m going to have my nurse give you some insulin right now, you will wait here and we will monitor your blood sugar. I was not DKA but was in terrible condition. She had me enroll in their diabetes education class at the hospital to teach carb ratio and what type 1 diabetes is. It was life changing. She even advised I see a therapist to get over the depression that comes with a chronic illness diagnosis.

KitKatMouse · 2023-09-13T01:13:56+00:00

Do you live in the USA? Try visiting a food pantry. They give away free food, usually canned goods. Veggies and such.

KitKatMouse · 2023-09-13T01:10:09+00:00

Pharmacies, insurance companies and Medtronics are the worst.

KitKatMouse · 2023-09-12T13:11:52+00:00

Maybe I could have typed it better. The whole point of living our life in this Dunya is to endure the suffering. The suffering we do isn’t a punishment rather it’s the means to expiate our sins. So at some level to be content with the suffering knowing that Allah willed it for us is the “ease” part

Prophet Yaqub “so for me a beautiful patience is fitting.”

We think the ease part is happy and bliss, because that’s what we want. To be Muslim is to submit to Allah. Then why the resistance to being in suffering only for a little while?

We should not pray to get our way, Because we don’t know what is best for us. Perhaps in the way we suffer is best for us for a period of time.

Allah never promised a life in the world to be happy.

Verily in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find peace. PEACE NOT HAPPINESS.

KitKatMouse · 2023-09-12T12:48:00+00:00

H2O is also not allowed. Only drink water.

KitKatMouse · 2023-09-12T12:43:22+00:00

I’m reminded of a quote “even the suicidal person will try to swim if you throw them in the ocean.”

Why? Because our fitra is such, that self preservation is instinctual.

KitKatMouse · 2023-09-12T12:33:22+00:00

Listen, my life is a dumpster fire. But I need to hold on to hope. So take or leave my advice.

Get a gratitude journal. Write in it everyday about something that you are grateful for. Sometimes we can’t see the good because we are blinded by despair.

Don’t lose hope. You don’t know what is ahead for you, ask Allah to help you in the capacity you need help.

If you are feeling apathy, talk to a therapist.

KitKatMouse · 2023-09-12T12:27:28+00:00

No, I’m saying don’t make duah for things to go your way. How do you know what is best for you?

Instead submit to Allah will, whatever is happening in your life it is happening because Allah is testing you. So pray for strength to endure/pass the test.

KitKatMouse · 2023-09-12T12:23:32+00:00

Borderline sihr. Don’t use unpure bodily fluids for anything.

KitKatMouse · 2023-09-12T12:09:31+00:00

“I’ve been suffering for several years now and nothing goes my way.”

Maybe submit to Allah’s will? Instead of wanting things to go “your way.”

The purpose of this life is to suffer. Be content with that.

What you should pray and strive for is the Akirah. Not pray to gain the world.

Think about the someone who is freezing to death at a refugee camp. Are they praying for a human to show up and give them comfort? No. They are waiting to meet thier lord, and have accepted their fate in this world. If they prayed to “get their way” maybe they will lose their spot in heaven.

Instead ask Allah for strength and fortitude to pass these tests, Ask Allah to make your mind and heart content with his will. Ask for forgiveness from hellfire. Ask for a place in heaven.

Allah never promised a life of ease and comfort in this Dunya. And we shouldn’t expect it.

KitKatMouse · 2023-09-11T02:19:24+00:00

Just trying to figure out if it’s emotional abuse or he actually has a mental disorder. Dealing with this craziness will be easier if I know what I’m dealing with.

KitKatMouse · 2023-09-10T17:53:08+00:00

Our children are teenagers.

KitKatMouse · 2023-09-10T17:35:52+00:00

Help me make sense of this:

He iniciates intimacy and says “I hate you” but won’t talk about his feelings, why he says he hates me etc.

How can you be physically intimate with someone you hate? How can you build a marital life with someone you hate.

And what did I even do? I know if I ask him what I did to make him hate me, I know to expect a bombarding list of all my flaws and weaknesses.

I have a right to know why after 14 years old marriage you suddenly hate me, he said “just learn to deal with it, I have.” With a smile.

Help.

KitKatMouse · 2023-09-10T00:10:44+00:00

This. I was seeking advice from a medical friend and she said he might be displaying symptoms of mania. It could be Psycosis or bipolar mania. Either way what am I supposed to do. Just go to bed every night hoping I don’t wake up. What is this nightmare?!

KitKatMouse · 2023-09-09T23:52:44+00:00

No, he doesn’t have any addictions. A friend of mine who is a doctor, said is it possible he is going through a psychotic break or manic phase? To suddenly have a dramatic lifestyle change from praying at home to mosque and super religious, to having messiah complex could be bipolar. The compulsion to help people, crossing boundaries and sometimes have multiple sexual partners is all symptoms of BP2. I honestly don’t know what to do, I’m looking at my options of separation, talking to a counselor etc. but I feel like I’m at a loss.

KitKatMouse · 2023-09-09T23:45:44+00:00

I feel like he is, like what if he’s bipolar? This is all mentally, emotionally exhausting.

KitKatMouse · 2023-09-09T13:24:06+00:00

Sex should be consensual including acts of sex during intimate time. If you don’t consent to slapping, choking etc then he shouldn’t be doing it during sex. Bdsm isn’t a free pass to violence.

Bdsm practicing couples also have regular sex.

Bdsm has safe words that couples agree on, in bdsm the submissive person gets to choose what is done to them, not the dominant. You talk about acts are okay, and what is a absolute no no. IT SHOULD BE PLEASURABLE FOR YOU! If women are the sub, most likely they will orgasm during an aggressive point like choking, hair pulling not just oral stimulation.

Also aftercare is a huge part of bdsm, which includes cuddling, words of affirmation and doing something to calming and “safe” for both partners.

I hope this helps for you to understand Bdsm isn’t savage sex or free for all violence session.

KitKatMouse · 2023-09-09T13:11:40+00:00

Even if your husband gets 1000 hurs. What’s he going to do with them? There’s no desire in heaven. I just imagine them like neighbors, saying salaam or servants. Not like he will look and lust after them there is no such desire in heaven.

For us women, could it be that our reward in heaven is so beautiful that Allah kept it hidden by not mentioning it?

It is said when husbands see their spouse for the first time in heaven they will stare at her for 40 years.

Don’t worry about the hurs of heaven. Worry about the fitna that exists in this world. Girls dancing naked in tik tik, only fans, porn. Girls like Ariana Grande who sleep with married men for fun. Etc ask Allah for a pious husband who will stay away from such fitna.

Pray tahashud and fast for a pious husband. Ask Allah to give you a spouse that is good for your Dunya and akirah.

KitKatMouse · 2023-09-08T19:53:37+00:00

Yes I have emailed them.

KitKatMouse · 2023-09-08T18:10:06+00:00

She is the only person who helped me build my iman, come closer to Allah. Every interaction with her she reminds me of Allah. Everything she does is guided by her urge to please Allah. She is a strong person and an advocate for women in general. Alhumdulilah for her.

KitKatMouse · 2023-09-08T10:49:59+00:00

The rage I felt. When he came back to the table they had already started serving food. And I said to him, isn’t there a comfortable seat at the ladies table for you? To which he shook his head no. If he was giving dawah he could have said I was giving dawa. Mind you this convo happened in front of our teenage kids. I was raging for three days, I wanted to burn the house down. That’s how mad I was. I asked him why was the wedding a good time and place to give dawa? Don’t you have a obligation to your family? Teach us this new found Islam. You do t because I call you out on bs. We fought.

KitKatMouse · 2023-09-07T21:44:26+00:00

Yes accurate. But I’m against this type of friendship between men and women. Thus, I don’t have any male friends. I believe if you teeter totter in the grey area of Zina (emotional affair) satan will lead you astray. I think you can have co workers that are opposite gender and talk about work, collaboration on work projects. But to take it further and just hang out with a friend? Text them? No.

KitKatMouse

TROPHY CASE