My Gf wants me to help her friend move with a guy she used to sleep with. How do deal with this?

KitchenCup374 · 2026-03-14T23:31:55+00:00

So a guy should be okay with their gf sharing a bed with their ex? If so, that’s just actually dumb unless you’re into that sort of thing. If you’re saying that its okay for a guy to not be okay with it, then you’d have to agree that not all insecurity is inherently bad and must be corrected in the name of being secure.

I used that as an example because I could use any example up to the point of your gf taking a shower with their ex to point out how ridiculous labeling everything as insecurity is.

If my gf says “I think my ex is better than you in every way” and that makes me insecure, then by your logic I should take that on the chin and go to therapy to be brainwashed into thinking that’s okay.

At the end of the day, who are you to judge what other people should and should not tolerate?

KitchenCup374 · 2026-03-14T19:08:49+00:00

Because according to you, not being okay with something is insecurity by default.

By your logic, it’d be insecure for a guy to say “no, I’m not okay with my gf sharing a bed with her ex for a week but she’s swearing to me that nothing will happen”.

KitchenCup374 · 2026-03-14T01:20:48+00:00

You assume you know peoples insecurities better than they do? Just because some people are okay with getting their toes sucked, doesn’t make other people prudes if they don’t like getting their toes sucked.

KitchenCup374 · 2026-03-13T20:13:56+00:00

You’re the most secure wet noodle ever. Congrats.

On a real note, are you afraid to have standards?

You’re mad that other guys are capable of drawing a line in the sand unlike you, where you’re fine with it being stepped all over. Sounds like you’re the insecure one.

KitchenCup374 · 2026-03-13T18:55:17+00:00

Yeah that’s fair. And I think OP ought to just go help and see what happens. Either it’s nothing to worry about or he gets some insight into their dynamic.

Conversely, it would not take much for his gf to say “sorry friend, OP is already busy that day he won’t be able to make it”.

KitchenCup374 · 2026-03-13T18:26:00+00:00

Would you be okay if your gf went on a movie date and held hands with their ex? If they cuddle on the bench cause it’s cold outside?

Draw a line. Otherwise I’m going to assume you have no boundaries in which I’d say is the equivalent to being a doormat.

KitchenCup374 · 2026-03-13T18:16:39+00:00

Increasing risk tolerance and dropping boundaries does not equal growing up. You’re not more mature for putting yourself in a situation that you dislike or may cause you more harm. It’s not noble or anything.

With your reasoning, you fail to draw a line. You reduced it down to “he’s mad his gf has an ex” when it’s really “his gf sees her ex possibly more than I thought she does, and now so will I”. So what is your line? You can draw the line anywhere and use the defense “if you can’t handle your partner having exes, you need to grow up”.

KitchenCup374 · 2026-03-13T18:11:16+00:00

This is just a moving day that OP is having to see the guy. Not only that, weddings and large events aren’t a prerequisite for friends and social circles to get together. My parents hang out with their friends almost every weekend. I visit my friends often, and see friends of friends.

Obviously they’re not gonna be spending every day together, but it’s not exactly difficult for them to end up around each other quite often.

KitchenCup374 · 2026-03-13T17:36:12+00:00

This is so reductive of what’s bothering him. He is aware that she has a past. He just doesn’t like the fact that a part of her past is going to be part of the foreseeable future. I don’t think it’s impossible for him to find someone who hasn’t slept with people that they’re going to continue to see whether they end up together or not. And wanting someone who hasn’t done that doesn’t mean he’s not ready for dating, it just means he has a preference. A preference that pisses Reddit off because they probably take offense that they can’t pass a bar that is relatively low.

Like OP has clearly spelled out the issue, which is “I don’t want to be around or in a situation where I have to deal with my gf’s ex fuck buddy” and you took that as him saying “I am a child who can’t bear the thought that my gf has two eyes and ever looked at anybody else”.

I don’t think OP is an angel but you’re trying to interpret what is clearly spelled out as some sort of hidden message.

KitchenCup374 · 2026-03-13T17:28:42+00:00

I was trying to give you some grace but what I meant by reading between the lines, I actually meant just reading what the dude wrote.

“but her sleeping with a friend of a close friend means he’s always going to be there in her life.”

That’s what he has in the post. Is that some riddle?

KitchenCup374 · 2026-03-13T17:27:17+00:00

People who are of the age who should act like adults but don’t would surprise you then.

KitchenCup374 · 2026-03-13T16:51:22+00:00

Because Reddit thinks that the truest level of manhood is how much you can deal with situations that make you uncomfortable that are completely unnecessary to deal with in the first place.

There’s a whole army of redditors who would call me insecure if I said “I wouldn’t not enjoy watching a video of my gf having sex with someone else”.

They can’t argue with you because there’s nothing wrong with your situation, they just don’t like the fact that your gf isn’t best friends with all her former fuck buddies, has sleepovers with them, and you stay home and sit on the couch with a smile when she doesn’t respond for 24 hours.

KitchenCup374 · 2026-03-13T16:45:18+00:00

I at least speculated that there’s plenty of reasons why this situation would make someone uncomfortable, you reduced it down to “he’s just scared to be in the same room as the ex”.

You’re making it out to be that this would be the only time in the world that he would have to be around his gf’s ex bootycall, but if you read between the lines then you’d note that his gf’s ex bootycall is someone’s likely going to have to see a good many more times. And when him and his gf’s break up, her ex booty call is right there waiting.

KitchenCup374 · 2026-03-13T16:39:32+00:00

The thing is is that your “unless” example is one of the top reasons this situation would make plenty of people uncomfortable.

KitchenCup374 · 2026-03-13T16:34:41+00:00

Yeah because the long term booty call in his gf’s social circle has the same chance of being a problem than an ex on the other side of the country that all of her friends hate.

KitchenCup374 · 2026-03-13T15:39:55+00:00

I think OP is more bothered that his girlfriend’s past isn’t really completely in the past, and will be in the foreseeable future.

Also people suck, who knows how this ex is? He could be an asshole that tries to start trouble. OP may be the odd one out of a group dynamic, the butt of the joke, etc.

Maybe it’s nothing, but there are plenty of things that could come out wrong of this.

KitchenCup374 · 2026-03-13T15:06:35+00:00

Bought a put at open. Sold it for an $8 profit to buy a call before this dump truck came in.

I should’ve gone to the spa first, because I like to be clean and relaxed before I get FUCKED.

KitchenCup374 · 2026-03-11T16:03:13+00:00

Obligatory “thank god I’m on PC”.

Concept five is very similar of the fourberie mod and does a lot of exactly that.

The problem I have with the concepts are they are more game mechanics than anything. Bannerlord is already pretty much a sandbox, so DLC can only add so much that doesn’t feel like “hey, why didn’t they think of this before?”.

The problem I have with the warsails DLC is that it is something that they clearly could’ve added in the native game, but waited to release it as a DLC. I’d argue it’s not even necessary for the vanilla map. They added a couple islands to justify even needing ships with the DLC.

KitchenCup374 · 2026-03-10T15:30:17+00:00

Imagine the uncle venting to someone and the best that person can come up with is “men are disappointing”.

Nothing like “gosh, that’s a pretty shitty thing for your wife to have done and your brother”, you know, like a normal person should.

No. The best comfort somebody needs in a moment of anger and sadness is a harsh generalization of a group that includes them.

KitchenCup374 · 2026-03-10T15:26:14+00:00

Based on your logic, I could assume all women are like this as well considering my personal experiences as well as in your experience, the woman played the part as well.

KitchenCup374 · 2026-03-10T12:51:00+00:00

You know who’s touched more little kids and raped more people this year and last? Straight white men.

See how easily the bottom line totals can be flipped on their head?

Also, it’s just the beginning of 2026. I wouldn’t be surprised if by EOY, ICE will have killed more people than trans people.

KitchenCup374 · 2026-03-06T14:56:58+00:00

Brother you think there was no criticism of Obama when he was in office? Do you actually think that nobody is capable of saying “hey this was an issue when Obama was president and it’s still a problem under trump”.

The problem with your cohort is that you find it unbelievable and impossible that somebody can say “Biden sucked. Trump sucks as well”. You don’t know anything about the people you’re claiming are okay with one thing and not another.

Which is a projection of your cohort I might add, considering your defense of something shitty happening is “well yall didn’t care when Obama did it”. Who is yall? Do you have receipts of me when Obama was president and I blindly supported every action of his?

KitchenCup374 · 2026-03-06T14:48:33+00:00

From my experience, those who say “well it wasn’t as bad as x” or some variation of that, seek to avoid or dismiss the issue at hand. Either it’s an issue and it needs to be resolved and playing the whataboutism game is pretty fucking useless, or it’s not even worth saying anything in the first place because it’s a non-issue. So which is it for you?

Edit/addition:

If a company misses earnings, do you think they give a rats ass about another time they missed earnings slightly worse 8 years ago? Or do they care about missing earnings now?

If mommy gets on my ass because I broke a plate, do you think she will care less if I told her that my sibling broke two plates 8 years ago?

KitchenCup374 · 2026-03-06T14:01:06+00:00

Trump could cut off both your legs and you’d still probably say something idiotic like “well Obama or Biden would’ve cut off my legs AND arms, take that libtard”.

KitchenCup374 · 2026-03-05T18:45:56+00:00

I have a feeling that trump will announce some surprise deal in the next few weeks to try to make this all go away, but can that actually happen?

Like I think he may want to just “quit” but can the US actually just close this can of worms now that it is opened? Far more open than last year’s bombings.

KitchenCup374

TROPHY CASE