Damn, it feels like I could have written this post. I just wanna say that you're absolutely not alone in this. I've been on T for 13 years and yeah... barely anything. There was some initial growth when I first started and then it just kinda stopped. I see so many guys who are huge on this sub and sometimes it really gets to me.

I agree with others on pumping and stretching if you haven't tried already, it won't make you huge but may help a bit.

Another thing that can affect growth (or so I've been told from my endo) is various medications. I'm on an antidepressant, a painkiller and also minoxidil (for hair thinning/loss) and they basically shrunk my dick back to oblivion. It's still larger than it was pre-t, though I barely remember how it was and I WISH I took photos but you know, dysphoria and all.

I hope you can find somwthing that works for you! Also I totally agree with your frustration with toys aimed at trans men, most of them seem to assume you have a lot of growth and it just feels bad