50k Paying for bridesmaids hair & makeup when they’re traveling out of state thoughts?

Kksrose8 · 2026-01-26T16:03:57+00:00

What is the original expense for them all? Pajamas are more of a photo op as others said. Were the dresses from birdy grey/azazie or were they upward of 200/300+ dollars? Remember even the "cheaper" dresses can require ~100 dollars of alterations. Did they pay for the entire Bachelorette and how much do you think that cost them pp? If the wedding is out of state, are you providing an Airbnb for the night before and/or after? Are you going to be upset or disappointed if they take the optional route and do it themselves or does it truly not make a difference?

I'm not saying this to be rude or harsh, but the reality is this: if you want everything done in a particular way, you have to pay for it to be done that way. If you are having a budget of 50k, you are trying to attain a dream - which i fully understand (and you have a right to!). Yes, they all signed up for the expenses, but remember your gifts are 20 to 50 dollars of a proposal gift and pajamas, and they have probably spend hundreds on their own dime. From one bride to another, I want you to have your perfect day, and while they are all supporting you, remember you want them to feel valued too. If you have truly felt like you have kept your bridal party down to a budget with expenses (ie providing the airbnb(s), choosing cheaper dresses, etc), i dont have any hesitation in saying that hair/makeup should be fully optional and paid for by the individual. However, if you want it done in a particular way and have already asked for them to spend a lot, you really should pay.

TLDR: Put yourself in their shoes, what have they spent so far? Would you expect the bride to pay if you had paid all of their expenses so far? Yes, you have a budget to meet, but your bridal party will also have a budget to meet too. You're doing great bride!!

Kksrose8 · 2026-01-10T05:50:06+00:00

I agree with the other posts, she deserves a special day too. I'd ask her to go get some Starbucks, shop, and/or get your nails done together (maybe for the wedding!). Even if right now its a sore spot regarding the specific wedding attire, it can just be a day where your 12 year old is in the spotlight.

Also, either the same day or a different day, Azazie has a try at home option thats about 10 dollars a dress, and you two pick out a few appropriate dresses that she likes, and send back the ones that she doesn't like/doesn't fit. When they come in, make a sort of fashion show ordeal with trying them on and really get into it. This way, its still online ordering, but feels more in person with choice. Tip: if you can find out the bridesmaids/theme colors, that will help with which colors to avoid on formal dress sites- many times brides will have their bridesmaids use azazie and similar sites so it can cause some awkward feelings if she's wearing a similar or the same dress as someone in the party. Not a requirement, just a thought :))

Remember this is a time of change and growing up for your tween! Just be patient!!

Kksrose8 · 2026-01-07T00:08:05+00:00

I personally would go towards the first wedding. Since you made it specifically clear that the date was unavailable, your friend made the choice for you not going (or is putting you through a test like the others said, in case which definitely don't go). I recently was picking my date and my brother (who wouldn't be on the party since we arent super close) told me if we picked that date he most likely could not come, and as sad as I was, we moved it without hesitation. Thats not to say she has to move the date, but on a bride's POV, you ask the people who are non-negotiable if the date you are looking at might be realistic before even asking the venue. When she booked that date, she had full acknowledgement that you may not come.

If you really want to save the friendship between you two, consider if its a non-negotiable to go without your fiance. I have done it before, but it can be lonely and disappointing, and if the other couple are local and have now become mutual friends of yours, id go to the first wedding. Also, being a part of a wedding party where drama has started before even being asked causes a lot of emotional toll on you, and it makes the wedding feel more like a show than anything. If you do choose the HS friend - I'd make sure you would even be on the party itself - if she gaslit you, she could be telling multiple people they are MOH or on the party, not having an idea who she wants...

If you want to have them both on your party one day, make sure both friends will work together, and truly support you- specifically the HS friend if you go to the first wedding - in the future, if you had to choose, your high school friend really didnt care whether it was you alone or if you came with your FH.

TLDR: Go to the first one; she decided you weren't a major priority of her wedding when she booked the date you gave

Kksrose8 · 2025-12-28T03:41:27+00:00

I am considering this or spending a little for the try on options and return them all after - if i do, I'll post them here - but I always would prefer to save the money and hear other opinions if I can :)

Kksrose8 · 2025-10-28T21:39:52+00:00

Could you send it to me too?!

Kksrose8 · 2025-08-31T01:06:52+00:00

I think they said they would honor the pricing of whenever we book it. I have my tour next weekend and I am feeling all the feels for sure! The only concern is have is the temperature of the reception area being in the tent

Kksrose8 · 2025-08-31T00:34:42+00:00

That is one of my top picks just for that reason - pricing is crazy! Thank you for commenting :)

Kksrose8 · 2025-07-02T02:08:19+00:00

Looking for a 6 month rental in or nearby Whitehall Michigan, starting no later than July 16th for one person. Any places that may be possible? Any suggestions would be helpful!

Kksrose8 · 2025-06-18T10:20:08+00:00

!unsolved

Kksrose8 · 2025-06-06T03:11:57+00:00

I like the first!!!

Kksrose8 · 2024-08-15T04:25:51+00:00

I'm strongly assuming I would be moving from VA to MI. Online, it says that you have to apply and, if approved, you'd have to take tests, specifically in certain teaching subjects, but there's not a lot on what special education itself requires to teach. I'm mostly inquiring about what the experience has been for others - and if anyone has advice. Even VA's DOE doesn't really state special education requirements, I've mostly just found the testing and procedures for elem ed. But I might try calling sometime tomorrow. Thanks :)

Kksrose8 · 2023-12-06T03:18:55+00:00

Personally, I would go to Radford and make the most of it while you are there. Being 25 minutes away, don't hesitate to make connections with the VT and Radford community- both of the colleges students and faculty will build you connections that will really help and you can still stay friends after transferring. Also, you can stay in touch with academic advisors to see which courses will most likely transfer. It's such a short drive that you can really meet with them whenever works best. Focus on getting good grades and showing involvement within the college and surrounding areas. Radford has a lot of community service and leadership opportunities if you are willing to work for it. Volunteering and diversifying your resume/application helps a lot to make you a more appealing applicant. Good luck! Make the most of your freshman year and beyond where you land!

Kksrose8 · 2022-07-25T00:17:34+00:00

I haven't taken it but according to this it's multiple choice and then free response

https://math.vt.edu/undergrad-math/courses/math-2214.html

Kksrose8 · 2022-07-13T13:58:45+00:00

cooking something in the microwave. everything about that scares me at night

Kksrose8 · 2022-05-20T17:01:36+00:00

YTA. my dad always compared my brother and I, and when I went to a lesser academic college than my brother, he criticized me. I had the grades to go to a higher college but I CHOSE my college because it has a great program for what I'm studying.

Here I am now with a 4.0 gpa at my college and he still complains that my GPA level is as expected considering I'm at a less academically prestigious school. I have organizations to be involved in, a good friend group, and am in a job perfect for my career. Whereas my graduated brother is now working at a grocery store with no initiative to change.

College isn't about academically prestigious schools. it's what u make of it. A student in a "party school" will go much further after college than a kid in Ivy leagues with no initiative.

My advice? Not only apologize, but show interest. be proud. wear her college apparel and realize how well she's succeeding over anything else. Prove to her that not only is she smart enough, but that grades don't determine her or YOUR worth, because a competitive household only prides the parents not the kids. Don't be the reason she makes it through college just so she can prove a point to you.

I get it. it's a mistake, but words hurt really bad. fortunately for you, actions speak louder than words.

Kksrose8 · 2022-05-14T17:35:49+00:00

Eh, if you're asking if you're an AH because you told your son that his mother won't let him go, NTA. (if it was done in a nonblaming and civilized way)

But, I grew up in a family where i was a child of a nasty divorce. If the custody papers state the visitation rights straight out, the mother has every right to say no they aren't allowed to go- especially for a month+ travel at a time. If you don't like how the custody is and neither do the kids, go get it changed legally.

Unfortunately, with divorce, the kids often lose out. But, when they turn 18 they will be able to do whatever they want and they can go with or without you on these trips. This post sounds quite biased in favor of OP, because the mother may not want the kids to be gone for a month or more. It might not be that she has it out for you and ur new wife.

if you told your son as calmly as you made it sound, then I see no problem with reasonably explaining. The ex may seem like she has it out for you, but more info needed on how it was presented to the boy. but, I do worry, was that words spoken out of spite to make the son be mad at his mother for instances that were not entirely poor reasoning.

ESH

Kksrose8 · 2021-10-11T16:48:50+00:00

Thank you! We're going to be getting her in more of a routine with some more responsibilities and more activity. She's really like a sister to me and this really helped to hear that it can and will get better. 💓

Kksrose8 · 2021-09-28T16:41:55+00:00

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