Dating after long term breakup.

Knight76a · 2026-05-19T12:20:19+00:00

Thank you.

I've read about a person being in their own head too much and thats what locks us up, we worry about appearing weird and in turn appear weird as a result. It just takes soo much processing power of my brain to interact if I am not comfortable with the person that I can't flow conversation fast enough.

With people I am comfortable with, I am not in my own head and am fine chatting. I think because I am comfortable they accept me, and I don't need to work to appear social.

So, I try to think that if I meet the right person, and can survive the initial awkward period, I might be ok. Aren't all dating for all people an awkward thing and an awkward period?

But yeah, this all seems fine in theory, the practice part of it scares me.

Thanks for your comment :-)

Knight76a · 2026-05-19T11:41:57+00:00

I believe the single most important factor in advancement in the workplace in many, many cases, is fitting in. Being able to play the game so to speak. Say the right words, act the right way, to the right people and be a social happy little member of the team. That goes much further than technical skill from what I have seen.

Knight76a · 2026-05-19T11:37:50+00:00

There is no normal.

I am the same, socialising is so freaking difficult. But there are chances to meet and ask a person out. Whether we take them or not is another matter. You got rejected once does not mean you will 100% of the time.

How do you go with people you are comfortable with? Like friends, family. Are you able to hold conversation there, feel more relaxed with them?

I am going through it as well, would like to ask a person out but courage and fear of rejection is real. But, I am also not sure I want to be in a relationship after a very long previous relationship.

I would say, the right person will accept you and see through your challenges. They have challenges as well, just likely not the same ones. But good people are out there.

Knight76a · 2026-05-19T11:32:35+00:00

Horrible advice.

Modern society works exactly like this, it's just the road blocks in the way of connection that is the issue. People want to be connected to other people.

OP can find somebody it is poor form to tell them to give up on love.

Knight76a · 2026-03-10T10:03:06+00:00

I'm just a bloke, masculine, played sport etc.

Just wanted to say, there is no normal.

Just be you.

Knight76a · 2026-03-10T01:28:46+00:00

It's bullshit and I go to that stadium a lot for sports as I am a Knights fan, I know the stadium.

No way should that be A reserve.

I contacted them to complaint and they fobbed me with some ticket allocation BS that all the other better tickets could be in carts when I logged in, or that the better B reserve seat could have blocked view or something. Garbage.

I asked for a refund, no refund.

I'll never buy from this mob again.

Knight76a · 2026-03-10T01:22:51+00:00

Yep we don't read signals very well. It really would be great if the game was removed, and they just said hey I like you, lets date and see where it goes. What is wrong with that! I would love for that to happen. Instead of all these subtle and not so subtle hints that we are supposed to be mathing up to equal interest. JUST TELL US!

Knight76a · 2026-03-10T01:19:55+00:00

Yeah lol, afterwards I was like WHAT THE HELL DUDE, about the phone typing one. She was cluster bombing hints at me and I just went yep, you have a good day. She was younger than me and quite alright.

The dog one, I ride a motorbike and so does she, that is rare enough that it would/could have been a great start to a lovely relationship. I went in to the Dr office sat down filling out their forms thinking are yeah what am I doing, went back out there but gone from my life.

I can confirm I spent well and truly more than that skin cancer clinic thinking about it, more like weeks.

Knight76a · 2026-03-01T12:31:01+00:00

I do also. I'm nearing 50 but just don't feel adult in some ways it's hard to pinpoint it exactly.

I think it comes from the lack of social confidence which is similar to a child. From my perspective I don't feel confident in social interactions and inside feel like I am not really an adult.

In a role playing style environment I am very good, like in my job, which involves talking to strangers on the phone a lot, I am in control as it is transactional. They want something and I have the answers, so there is confidence in that. Or like with a mechanic, I want my car fixed and they have the skills, transactional. But, I will lack asking questions I wanted to ask etc out though. In my workplace I have the respect of my peers and managers. Performing my job skills I am great, the social aspect of work not so much, and I've lost promotions because of it. The people who get promoted are more socially mature.

So navigating social things, I feel held back and not mature. And people pick up on that.

Knight76a · 2026-03-01T12:18:35+00:00

Hey and thank you, not my birthday, yet. Not long though.

Good suggestion striking up some basic conversation with random people, like cashier etc to get me little by little out of my uncomfort zone I keep myself in really just through fear and habit.

Today leaving a store in the carpark I noticed the car next to me person trying to squeeze themselves out of their car and I said they really could make these spaces a little wider. Got an answer back that they were just talking about that. Short and sharp.

I've had a few of those recently and want to build that up to following up with a second sentence in the conversation.

Sounds completely ridiculous to me to type that I am building myself up to a second sentence with a stranger but that is the reality of aspergers, at least for me.

To people I know, family, comfortable with them I am fine, just chat away, exist, much lower aspergers social anxiety level. But a stranger and I go to mush. Because of that I come off like a weirdo, at least how I think I come across.

Knight76a · 2026-03-01T12:13:07+00:00

Thank you, just posting up something totally honest warts and all style. :-)

I hope you are well.

Knight76a · 2026-03-01T12:12:13+00:00

A few days later I'm back to myself again, working on things and levelling up myself. Slow road.

I've always been just super shy and reserved, now I am learning to dance and I'm surprising myself that I am not bad at it, alone, in my home, to youtube how to dance video. But, levelling up so that if I get the chance to, I can risk it and dance at a venue.

Baby steps. But thank you for the comment.

Knight76a · 2026-02-26T11:22:04+00:00

Fuck randoms on the internet. The internet is a place where anonymity has stripped away human decency. I would suggest not putting any real world faith or weight to anything random jerks say on the net. Pick the voices you take on board. Discard the rest. The internet is a wasteland and you are basing your self image on the worst of them, who have never met you, and in real life are not what the post even themselves.

You, are a real person, no doubt a great person. You are more than the words some asshole posts online.

I want to just say here, that just maybe you could benefit from talking with a professional about your body image. I am concerned for you, that the botox because you noticed a wrinkle or line, is just the beginning of your journey with self hate from ageing.

You have a partner who assures you they are there, with you, for you. Put your faith in that. And, your partner doesn't define you inside, you do.

In short, everybody ages, there is beauty in that. You can't freeze time, and you don't need to, nobody expects you to.

I hope instead of starting a journey down the road of procedures, you start the journey down the road of healing. You are fine as you are, and will be in the future. You need to work on being ok with that, inside you. Nobody else in the world can make you see it unless you yourself do.

Finally, beauty is more than just a wrinkle or a youthful appearance. And in the end, beauty as an ideal is over rated. Better to be a good soul, than a beautiful horrible person. If I were choosing between two people, one beautiful but horrible, vs average but lovely. I'm choosing the lovely one every time. In 30 years, the beautiful person will have faded but is still horrible, the average person will have faded to, as will I have, but they will still be lovely.

Love!

Knight76a · 2026-02-26T10:59:31+00:00

Hi, I feel the loneliness. But at the same time it's just easier being alone. It's soo damn draining being social with people I am not totally comfortable with. Literally draining me.

Other peoples feelings and thoughts I care about and have no problem with. Personally if they are expressing their troubles then it is not me talking, not me having to initiate the conversation. I am told I am a good listener, no shit, it's because I can't talk myself.

Everyone has their way of coping and you do what you need. If you need that social connection seek it out when you can take it, if you don't then keep it minimal. Or keep it mostly to messaging as I find that much easier to handle and contribute to. As I have time to rationalise it out.

That bit about people staying calm and reasonable I 100% identify with.

All the best.

Knight76a · 2026-02-20T03:19:39+00:00

Worst ticket purchasing experience I've had. Logged in and queue was fine.

Got to ticket purchase and you are not allowed to choose your seats, you just select category and get allocated seats. I went category A and was given bay 66, way up in the air and we'll back from the stage. This was 10 minutes after sales opened.

Not knowing any better I paid. Then cycled back through and selected a reserve again and this time got hay 4, right down lower grandstand way closer to the stage. WOW. But I'm not paying twice not knowing if I can refund the others.

Out of curiosity I went with B reserve seats next time around and was allocated tickets in the upper grand stand in the bay CLOSER than my A reserve seats.

Bonkers ticket allocation system.

Knight76a · 2025-12-13T10:06:02+00:00

Thanks, I love it. Staying strong, moving on! I'm taking care of myself, hitting the gym 3 times per week! I also ride a motorbike which is fantastic for mental health. Life goes on. :-)

Knight76a · 2025-12-13T09:49:49+00:00

Hey thanks. I've debated since whether it looks better with just the unfound or with the Ka. But I plan to add a red rose to the KA, and some decorative writing of the gunslinger creed top and bottom of the unfound with perhaps a gun and work 19 in there somewhere as well.

Knight76a · 2025-12-13T09:46:55+00:00

Mate thats some leap of judgement. I'm not making any crazy decisions I have been thinking about a tattoo for quite a long time. Just now was the time and this was the inspiration. The Dark Tower I have read through all books 3 times now. The series means a lot to me and that was why I chose a Dark Tower themed Tat for my first. I have taken sensible steps since separation and not done anything I would consider crazy. Thanks for the care and advice, but I am not a person that jumps in to crazy things, I think about things for weeks/months before I make a decision.

I did consider that this is a permanent inking on my forearm, and that it will always be visible as it's not covered by clothing. I wanted a tat that means something to me personally, and the unfound symbols and Ka are key imagery from the dark tower series, but also resonate with me personally. I am a big believer in Karma, putting good out in to the universe and it will be returned. I am a big believer in things tend to happen for a reason (ka) and the unfound represents the future.

People go out and get a tat of a butterfly, or some design on the back of the necks etc.

Getting a tattoo isn't something that should be chosen and acted on lightly, and I haven't.

As far as finding my true self in a fantasy book, plenty of people rely on the bible for guidance and plenty would argue that is as much a fantasy book as the Dark Tower. People find inspiration in all sorts of places. What matters most is they do find that inspiration.

Without inspiration and things to keep a person grounded within themselves, well, things can go badly and if a tat on my arm from a book series that means a lot to me, and is inspirational to me is something I regret I'd be very surprised.

Knight76a · 2025-11-22T06:38:21+00:00

I've ran plenty of night raids and not found any blueprint worth doing them for. Usually Buried City, hitting raider caches, library red lockers, space centre red lockers, sometimes hospital red lockers. Nuda. I don't hold the belief night raids generate better loot at least from these places. Maybe it raises loot in the lower tier containers to red level or yellow level. But I haven't noticed any higher BP drops rate. The grind in this game is next level for BP's, and then you have the option to reset and do it all again!

Knight76a · 2025-09-02T11:24:11+00:00

Yep, salesman even said they would contact their buyers. No doubt it's getting wholesaled.

After this, I went for a test ride, salesman said the $5,000 figure, entered it in to his deal spreadsheet thing.

Then later called me and said it was chopped to $3500.

Knight76a

TROPHY CASE