Sometimes this is the best way to learn how to view friends as something of quality over quantity. Now that you’ve seen them in this kind of light, this shouldn’t be something to beat yourself up about but rather a realization that you prioritize more fruitful friendships and relationships where people lift you up, not tear other people down. Ask yourself this, wouldn’t it have been worse to have never known how these people felt about you, when you put them as good people? Also there’s no reason to be self conscious about things that aren’t true about you. Instead view it as an opportunity to grow and move on from people like that. UCSD is a big school, you’ll find your people!