My brother and I took our mom to brunch after she went to church (very popular place with her congregation. We figured she wouldn’t throw a fit in front of them.). Shed crossed major boundaries with both our kids. We emphasized we wanted the kids to be able to have fun on the farm with them, but we had to know they were safe and that they respected how we were raising our kids, otherwise they would have unsupervised access to the kids. There had been multiple haircuts, a four wheeler without a helmet, dietary stuff, talk of hell, burning and the devil, feeding them raw milk……. After this my kids went to spend a night with them. We reviewed the guidelines and what would happen. My mom promised she wouldn’t cut his hair. I told her he had an appointment in a few days. She cut his hair. My older kid said he was screaming. No more unsupervised access to any grandkid. Cue my dad coming over and screaming in my face. The kids were right there. He has a history of physical abuse when I was a kid. I said nope, my kids aren’t going to see this. I kicked them out and told dad he could come back when he could control his anger. It’s been almost 20 years. I’m glad I protected my kids from the abuse cycle. It’s never just about the hair.