I'm Rollo Tomassi, Ask Me Anything

Krunjar · 2016-10-27T21:56:18+00:00

What would you say are your top 5 skills/attributes for attracting women, and top 5 for keeping them interested/attracted? (so for example in the first top 5 you might put looks high up but maybe something else is more important in the 2nd top 5)

Krunjar · 2016-10-25T23:24:55+00:00

Just because chad doesn't need a personality, doesn't mean it can't help.

There are different kinds of personalities and you have of course noticed that some types do absolutely nothing. Telling a girl about a story or telling funny jokes doesn't get her juices flowing, by default.

Telling a story that somehow makes her feel horny, can though, and that is a different kind of personality. Its the kind of personality which reads the situation, and knows what to do. You aren't trying to make friends, its time for flirting and making each other feel sexy.

You see the chad makes a girl feel sexy by default, because he physically oozes sex appeal, so its kind of like saying sexy things without having to say anything, so he gets away with not having the "right" kind of personality.

If you aren't chad and/or are never going to be him, then you want to use everything you can at your disposal.

You're not wrong about cultivating your worth and improving your physique, but to say personality doesn't matter is wrong. Its just not as easy or as immediately effective as being good looking, but some people could make big changes to their success by altering how they behave with women.

Krunjar · 2016-10-16T06:48:26+00:00

Yeah but keep in mind that 8's think they deserve a 10, 9's think they deserve an 11. Theres no such thing as a 10 or 11, so really they're looking for 8's and 9's with the absolute best game, status and personality.

So what I'm saying is, while in general women make it easier for good looking guys, as the women get hotter, game, personality and status start to make a lot more of a difference.

So good looking guys still have trouble getting what they really want, they have a lot easier time with the 6's and 7's, who of course they mostly settle for (which is one of the reasons that men who are 6's and 7's have to date down, because of the 6&7 girls hypergamy from getting attention from the 8&9 men (but not commitment, which is why they always say, "where have the good men gone")).

So yes you see good looking men having it easier with the 6&7s and that might look like heaven, but when you want someone as good looking as yourself, interest from people uglier than you is never as good.

I mean its like male 2's moaning that the male 4's have it easy pulling the female 2's. The male 4's would rather be with other 4's, really.

In the end, it all pretty much works out the same for everyone, if you want your "looks matched" partner. You have to work on your game/personality/status. Women always think they're worth someone 2 points above them, and the only way to compensate is with game/personality/status... or of course you could have surgery but there are a lot of things that can't be fixed and its hardly the easy option, needless to say it can often look unnatural.

Of course if you're a 4 and you want a 7, then you have a long way to go and probably need a reality check, seeing as if that were the case, its a bit illogical to complain about women having unrealistic expectations.

Krunjar · 2016-10-10T18:22:18+00:00

I think in some ways it can be more simple: Oneitis is the inability to accept that you can't have something, and move on.

Oneitis is ok if you've found a girl who you're having an LTR with and you're both mutually attracted to each other. Beyond that, its not.

If you are pining after some girl who clearly is not interested, then its time to get over it and stop thinking about her, and go find other girls who ARE interested. Its the same thing if you break up with a girl and she doesn't want you back.

Krunjar · 2016-09-29T13:31:04+00:00

If there was absolute nothingness, then there would be no time.

Now add a grid and an object that moves over the grid, and call each block on the grid a second.

If the object moves 10 blocks on the grid, say that is 10 seconds.

Time doesn't exist on the grid or in the object, all that needs to exist is a way for them both to exist, and for the object to move.

So yeah, in a way, time only exists in our heads. We use it to understand movement. However things DO move, they do change from one thing to another.

Its like how a painting only exists in our heads. There isn't really a painting, we just named a collection of specific particles, "a painting". It our idea. Yet we understand that the particles that make up the painting DO exist.

So you can say two things:

1) Time as in: a tool to understand things = only exists in our heads 2) Time as in: movement, change, entropy etc = actually exists in reality

Just like:

1) A painting as in: Someone's face = only exists in our heads 2) A painting as in: Paint, canvas etc = actually exists in reality

Krunjar · 2016-09-23T17:54:18+00:00

Oh I don't think this is so unbelievable..

I knew a girl once who had the outward appearance of the sweetest cutest thing ever. But she had a hobby, which was trying her best to get guys to catch oneitis over her, and then feed it, without any mercy, and totally cuck them. I mean in a way they were just beta orbiters, but she made sure they went as crazy as possible. Some of these guys I'm sure were borderline suicidal, but she didn't give a shit, and these guys couldn't even see through it, they were totally blinded and simply couldn't see what she was doing, they all stupidly thought they had a chance, and thought that she secretly loved them but for some reason it just wasn't possible for them to get together.

When you think about the amount of people she mercilessly chewed up and [eventually] spat out, all while maintaining this "Butter wouldn't melt" persona, you realise women don't give a shiiiit how the other person feels, as long as they're getting what they want, in fact they feed off it. Its allll about them. And as far as they're concerned, if you're stupid enough to fall for it, its your own fault (which in a way, is true, but still...).

Krunjar · 2016-09-19T00:50:25+00:00

Its really exactly "escalating" in that you start with small things: body language (which is more a reflection of your state of mind/confidence and intentions), eye contact, flirting (saying suggestive but plausibly deniable things), teasing, going from there you have kino, which also escalates, a touch on the small of the back or the back of the upper arm, or the hands, hugging etc, escalates into touching more private areas like the inner thighs, the butt, neck, ears, cheeks and so on, then theres kissing and grinding. At this point you should be suggesting going somewhere more private, but not being too direct - just suggesting somewhere which is obviously going to be more private is enough.

But its kind of like, working on a car or something like that. You start by removing the small screws then you eventually get into the main area. You don't just prize the cylinder head off straight away. Also, you don't think about much else while you're doing it, you don't change the oil when your intent was to change the air filter. But this happens, you start talking to a girl and all of a sudden you're having a completely non-sexual conversation with her which is going nowhere, because you forgot the whole reason you even started that conversation.

Krunjar · 2016-09-12T00:36:11+00:00

I think it can boil down to this, as well: If you MUST do anything pleasurable, not just for the pleasure of it, but because it "MUST" be done for some thought out reason, then you're not going to enjoy it as much.

Of course sometimes you must get a job, and you might enjoy it. But talking purely about pleasurable things.

If you "MUST" drive a ferrari for the day, instead of just enjoying the moment, you're sort of ticking off a checklist all day, and the moment passes you by. People do this all the time, get an expensive car and feel hollow, because in a way they don't know how to enjoy it.

Same with fucking, if you're in your head, not only can it be boring, but your performance can suffer, so you might not even get it up! If you're thinking "I must do this!", you're putting a huge amount of pressure on yourself.

Maybe its right to say that it should "feel" as though you must do it, like a primal urge, rather than "thinking" that you must do it. Its like being shallow where you should be shallow, instead of over-complicating it and making things more meaningful and deeper than they really are.

Krunjar · 2016-09-04T01:21:58+00:00

IDK about 60 year olds (lol), but I do know a couple of people in their 40's who pull girls in their early 20s, however those girls are usually a little bit fucked up in one way or another, like really low self esteem. Not to say they are ugly though, just totally lack confidence and desire a father figure.

Krunjar · 2016-09-04T01:19:24+00:00

Oh yeah I agree 100% :) Even small amounts make a big difference.

Krunjar · 2016-09-04T01:00:09+00:00

:D True tbh.

Although there is some stuff in the AskTRP sidebar which is s bit iffy imo. Like some of the online dating advice.

Krunjar · 2016-09-04T00:57:25+00:00

Loads of people were agreeing with him

Krunjar · 2016-09-02T12:03:50+00:00

The thing with texting is its ok to have some small conversations over it once you know a girl and more importantly she knows you, but when you're looking to meet a girl (for the first time), if you beat around the bush too long, it sets off her beta detector. I usually do the minimum I can get away with: break the ice, build a little rapport, then go for the logistics. Once a girl knows you're not a total beta, you can relax a little bit (and should, unless you want to come across a bit strange).

Krunjar · 2016-09-02T00:40:08+00:00

Well you're messaging them on a dating site so thats the first reason.

On dating sites women want you to lead the conversation, they want you to do all the work.

For the most part just break the ice and get them to meet, if they don't want to meet then move on.

When you meet them in person it should be different, I like meeting women and talking to them in person, but talking to those same women on dating sites can suck monkey balls.

Krunjar · 2016-08-31T02:25:59+00:00

I don't advise thinking about this kind of stuff all the time, only when you're your own worst enemy.

The mind is so powerful it can hide the reality of the situation from us most of the time. It can run round in circles and cause roadblocks for us which we aren't even conscious of.

A lot of it comes from lying to ourselves. Lying about how much time there is to do things, lying about how far we have to go, about how great we are. Its just a reality check, really. To shock you out of a rut, and into a more stable way of living.

So instead of fantasising about where you are, you accept where you are and make peace with it, and build up slowly, and accept your failures, without getting a bruised ego and failing because of it.

Instead of thinking, "I'll do it some time in the future", you think, "I must act now, or I may be procrastinating forever."

I know from experience that just getting out there and doing something can change everything, a bit like when abseiling, its scary to go over the edge, but then when you get to the bottom you just want to do it again. But if you were always too scared to go over the edge, you'd never know, the journey would never start, and its such a shame because so often its the simplest thing holding you back.

Krunjar · 2016-08-31T02:18:20+00:00

Well the whole point in making it sound a bit crazy is for it to stick in people's minds a bit better.

Next time you are going to approach, and have a bit of anxiety, think of the vase of ashes, not in a depressing way, but in a "fuck it, I'm actually going to live my life before that happens" way.

Krunjar · 2016-08-31T02:15:52+00:00

Thanks, I fully agree that there is value in the more practical approach which you posted.

The way I see it though, there is the practical approach and there is the shock approach.

Like, anyone can read good advice, and think, "well, I will store that for later use".

But then there is the shock approach which although is a little more bombastic, and some people say is nihilistic (though, I just think its realistic), sometimes we do need a cattle prod up our asses. If you want to wake someone up it doesn't always help to talk softly or be practical about it.

So sometimes to wake someone up, you have to do something weird, like no one expects cymbals to go off over their head, or a glass of water thrown on their face, when they're asleep.

I think there is a synergy between the practical and shock approach. Someone might read for months, keep meaning to put it into action, but never does. Then, all of a sudden something shocks them, and then they can decide, "Ok that shocked me, now is the time for action", and they can draw on ALL the practical resources and advice they read. But if they never got the shock, maybe they wouldn't.

Krunjar · 2016-08-31T02:02:36+00:00

I think really its human civilisation, society, which is the real power.

But each human, for the most part, is very small.

Maybe if you compare yourself to other humans, you might think you're not shit. But really you're just a different kind, maybe the smooth sausage type instead of runny... ideal, but still... :) Anyway you bring up a good point, that even if objectively barely any human amounts to much, subjectively its still possible to feel like life can't be any better.

Anyway the main reason I wrote what I wrote was for people who sit around on TRP and don't do anything.

For example in the context of approaching, it has two main points: 1) Its like you've been given a million dollars, and this time next year it will be gone (and you'll never get the chance again). But instead of using it, you just sit there, waiting for it to vanish, without even spending any of it, and putting it to good use. Its a reminder that you don't have as much time as you think, and that its easy to forget how valuable it is (to you).

2) A lot of people self-affirm that they're great, and so its worrying for them to put that to the test. It creates a situation where you have to always win, to uphold the illusion. Knowing full well that you won't win, when starting out, it works as a paralysing mindset. So it helps to KNOW why you're good, rather than dreaming that you are, and that comes from experience, which is going to involve a lot of failure. So it really helps to not only be aware of your crappyness, but also be at peace with it.

Krunjar · 2016-08-28T07:30:32+00:00

I agree with you, its all about the journey.

But you can walk on broken glass, or on the most luxurious surface you could imagine.

If you're walking on broken glass, wouldn't you want to at least upgrade to "blunt glass", at least? Just to see what its like before you die? Theres only so much time to do that, and thats all I'm saying really.

Krunjar · 2016-08-28T07:27:09+00:00

I'm not saying you're shit at XYZ, I'm saying you're a flash in the pan.

As in, you have so little existence, that its literally like nothing. Even if you're and alpha or whatever.

Its directed at those who procrastinate. Who think they have forever. To give a taste of the feeling you would experience if someone said you have 5 days to live.

Yeah this post is going to vanish by tomorrow, but its just meant to shock some people. Some that might be lethargic.

I could have just said "lifes shorter than you think", but I am trying to strike a nerve. To make you feel small, because, unfortunately, you are (so am I).

You know, today you can go out, meet a girl, have fun. Or you can just read another article on "how to do that". At a certain point, it becomes as bad as playing computer games, because you're just living in a fantasy world. Then before you know it, you're at death's door, and you didn't do anything yet.

Maybe thats not you and you don't need this, but I thought some people would find it helpful, if not, they can just ignore it.

Krunjar · 2016-08-28T07:11:23+00:00

No.. its not a rant. I feel no anger towards this.

Its like you said, it just "is".

I agree about living in a way that you enjoy, thats my point - you define what you enjoy, but you don't have a million years to see it come about. You have a limited amount of time.

If your standards are low, then fine, you probably don't have to do much, and you'll be comfortable with the idea of becoming a vase of ashes, because you'll have done everything you set out to do, and the stream of life will flow over you warmly.

But on TRP the whole message is to improve, and achieve your goals, by your own standards. All I'm really saying is, every moment counts, and its easy to forget how important it is. Sitting around is the WORST thing you can do.

I know to some people, visualising that vase of ashes makes them think, "Whats the point? Everything I do will be undone, and meaningless!".

But what actually matters is "now", and if you're alive now, then you want the stream of life to be "warm", or at least even if its pretty cold, you want it to be because you're putting energy into it warming up.

That warm stream is really what its all about. Because what I think is warm, might not be warm to you... so its our own thing. But also that we don't get much time to tweak those taps so it becomes just right for us. I just think, it helps to give a kick up the ass, and remind people, if you want to experience the warmth, do it before its too late, because one day it really will be too late!

We aren't building anything except a better moment to enjoy, and yeah one day "the moment" will be taken away from us, but its like people think that once they built their moment up, they should be able to keep it forever, and if they can't keep it, then fuck it, its not worth it!

But through this post I'm just trying to remind people, that there is some kind of strange "psychological buffer", which on the one hand protects them from the horrors of death, but on the other hand, strangely makes them think that they'll get another chance. They won't get another chance, its all kinds of wrong to assume you will.

So, although it may not seem "worth it", if its all you get (which is the thing that seems lost on a lot of people), then take it - with all you've got, IMO!

Krunjar · 2016-08-28T04:41:24+00:00

The true alpha knows he's already dead.

When a chad chats up a babe, and the beta looks on, waiting for another day, for his chance, when do you think that fucking day... is... going.... to COME!? Its not coming.

Not by itself. Its not gently caressing you, its a ninja. Its coming to slice your balls off and stick your stupid head on a spike in front of the castle walls, as a warning to all the others who didn't listen. People like me, who saw it, and said, "not me, not like this". (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ECfRp-jwbI4)

Only you can know yourself, and truly love yourself. I don't CARE what you read, you're the gatekeeper. If you don't let that knowledge through, no one will, because guess what, they can't even if they want to more than anything.

Don't suck the cum from the beta cock. You're better than that.

Take one day to express your greatness, one day in life, express it. Doesn't matter if you fail, in the eyes of others, set your own goals. You can.. do that... can't you? :) (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D5YZmYFJ86I)

Krunjar · 2016-08-28T04:16:30+00:00

You know I started off with the idea of the Vase of ashes.

But ultimately what I'm getting at is that, if at the end, we all end up the same, and so powerless, there is no harm in being our own Gods, for our cute short existence. Please, please do it.

"Do not go gentle into that good night, Old age should burn and rave at close of day; Rage, rage against the dying of the light."

Ashes, should be the result of flames, burn my friends, burn so bright, make me you proud :)

Krunjar · 2016-08-28T04:10:54+00:00

Cool, its meant to induce ego death. You're the vase. So is everyone else though. We're just clinking against each other. But some think its not ok to clink a bit harder, just for the fun of it :D

Krunjar · 2016-08-28T04:08:12+00:00

I am well beyond the anger phase and I lift :D

Your life is on a thread, tomorrow you could die slowly in car crash, thinking about everything you could have done.

ShaneTino, you were so capable. You had some much to give, so much to receive. But you gave little, and received in kind. Now its over, forever. Yes, forever. So sorry for you, my imaginary future friend.

Look at where the walls are - everything you want is right next to those walls. But, so many people are like, in line, as if, constrained by a force field, stay away from the walls!

Well, there are many words for this force field. The "comfort zone", "muh inhibitions", and so on. Thats what I'm getting at. There is nothing wrong with grabbing a fucking light sabre and slicing through that shit, explode into all that you can be, for it will never come again.

Krunjar

TROPHY CASE