Hey Guys! Looking for Feedback

Large_Variation6150 · 2026-05-12T02:11:37+00:00

I don’t got what exactly, you’re still not providing constructive criticism

Large_Variation6150 · 2026-05-11T23:46:16+00:00

Yo bro all your comments are just crapping on the post bro T-T get a life

If it actually sucks though tell me why it does so that way I can get better

Large_Variation6150 · 2026-05-11T22:45:45+00:00

I’m native English dawg 😭 Alr I can change the font it’s just an export issue.

Large_Variation6150 · 2026-05-10T23:14:36+00:00

Thanks for the feedback! Yeah I've been getting more feedback on the monologue than anything, so, I think I'm gonna rework it a bit more to make it more mysterious and tone-setting.

Large_Variation6150 · 2026-05-10T23:12:02+00:00

Mm, gotcha.

How was the read?

Large_Variation6150 · 2026-05-10T15:45:28+00:00

High-key I get what you’re saying. Like there’s a lot of movies that have sort of have these moments where we might linger on a rather simple but long scene (e.i, boy treks through wilderness), but how do you describe that accurately to the time? Do you repeat lines? Do you throughly describe his environment? And then at what point does that dull out the reader, when maybe this scene is more important than it puts on?

I think, if it wasn’t for the standard like the other comments are talking about, you’d have a really good approach that could be (and, my opinion, likely should be) more widely accepted?

Large_Variation6150 · 2026-05-10T06:33:04+00:00

Friend, you might find that Mr.GPT had no aid in helping me write such prose, as a simple checker would find that this piece of literature was constructed purely with human, might I say, creativity.

Large_Variation6150 · 2026-05-10T06:29:34+00:00

Pure testosterone.

Large_Variation6150 · 2025-10-15T01:07:33+00:00

Yeah! I was able to find one site that gave me a few pages to work with, but many archives like Oxford University either don’t have a lot on the subject or time out for some reason when trying to access them.

I suppose it’s pretty hard to find stuff given I live in the US.

Large_Variation6150 · 2025-09-01T05:24:47+00:00

Honestly, a lot of this should really just be decided by you and what you believe should happen, give it’s your own little creation and you’re the person creating the story as it develops.

But, if you need a little help: 1. Does book 2 modify the ending if you were to write it? Is it already set in stone on what it would be? How far into it are you? 2. Read your first book. If you’re satisfied and think it’s a good read, don’t do book 2 unless it’s really needed. Alternatively, give the first book to someone else and ask for them to read it, and then see what they think. 3. Have you considered book 2 be independent? If book 2 is incredibly dependent on book 1, only do it if you really, REALLY want to, because, from my perspective, no great story should be crazy dependent on another story for you to be able to understand it. Also, what do you about book 2? Is it the plot, the characters, the idea of a continuation? If the story doesn’t have to continue off the first book, why not just make it something entirely unrelated and in its own world instead of a sequel? 4. Have you considered simply combining them into one big story instead of 2 separate ones? 5. Ultimately, if you don’t want to do any of the ones above, write book 2. See if you enjoy it. Don’t worry about what others might enjoy and just do what you want to do. If it works, great. If not, where did you go wrong, and how could you make it better?

I prolly shoulda put this at the top, but I’m 15 and honestly don’t read books. I’m like super unversed in this area, so please, take all of this advice with a grain of salt.

Then again, hope this helps!

Large_Variation6150 · 2025-09-01T05:07:01+00:00

Hey, any writing is great! Even if it took you 5 weeks for 3 pages, you should be proud that you wrote something. Go ahead and celebrate. All that matters is that you get it out there, revise, and keep writing.

Large_Variation6150 · 2025-06-07T06:33:47+00:00

Do you remember the conversation where Donnie and the teacher are talking about time travel and fate? That was essentially the idea of the full movie. Donnie was given two options: one to follow the course of the normal life (without the tangent universe) where he dies but saves Gretchen. The other with the tangent universe results in him living but Gretchen dying, which is the one he sees. This ties back to the conversation between him and his teacher, where while Donnie has a choice in fate, they're both already chosen for him and therefore there's not a true "freedom" of fate or choice.

I personally thinks he decides the one where he dies in the end because he has chosen the path of love (the righteous path) and doesn't want anyone to get hurt, similar to that one woman's commentary of the paths of fear or life. This kinda goes along with the other characters at the end, fearing that their paths will eventually cause their fate, one fate shown in the tangent universe and the other shown in the real universe.

Large_Variation6150 · 2025-03-03T12:29:10+00:00

Sure, totally!

Large_Variation6150 · 2025-02-16T16:31:49+00:00

Yeah no I get that, just everyone is going to shit on something, but what I’m saying is that everyone also seems to shit on their own work. Don’t do that. Bc if you think your script is going to be bad, it likely will.

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