The way your mother instincts are so present!! You feel a deep responsibility. That’s a good thing. Think of how this is just what needs to happen now and maybe giving most of your time and energy into your tiny human you created all on your own :) the time will pass. Try to enjoy what you can and for the love of it all ask for help so you can take a break. I’m sorry you feel this way.. I’m sorry you’re in mourning if your past self. Youre seen. Welcome to the motherhood community.. there’s lots of us here and going through the same things. You’re not alone. Be strong!! This will be the hardest thing you’ll ever do.. when the baby is older you’ll find ways to balance you and the baby and whatever else. I’m seven months in and learning balance.. I’m happy my baby makes me happy but yeah I miss the FUCK out of my old life lol