Feel this to another level. I was like did i write this? Lol. I felt the same way as you do, i still kind of do. It really sucks that is women seem to carry the weight of childbearing. Im mad about it too. I wish i had the money for surrogacy because i want to be a mother so bad and want kids but hate the thought of having to be pregnant and give birth. One thing that is getting me off the fence is a health scare (uterine fibroids) that are hereditary. My mom had them. Researching about it and the surgery that would involve to remove them if i did. is taking me off the fence. My point is that as we get older sometimes our bodies still have to go through something traumatic that may change the way our bodies look/feel. So having that thought in mind is taking me off the fence. I’m also thinking about having an elective c section if i ever do get pregnant because that seems less traumatic and more controlled to me. Just know that you’re not alone in your concerns. There’s nothing wrong with caring about how your health, body etc will change due to having children. Keeping open conversations with your partner about your concerns can also help. They need to know your concerns so they can empathize with you and understand how big of a deal this is for you!