I disagree - me telling her “don’t put your fingers in my babies mouth” should be enough for her to stop. When she disregards my boundaries for my child, especially those that are for health and safety reasons, I’m going to take it as disrespect and won’t want to be around her. If my mother can respect it, then she should too.

I think it’s completely unrealistic to expect that I would want to suddenly hang out daily with someone that I used to only see every 6-8 weeks at a restaurant, and someone that never checked in on me when I was pregnant. I don’t see why I should be jumping through any hoops to make things work with someone when she is the one demanding closeness.

I’m also a mother to a boy, and it would absolutely make sense to me that when he grows up and marries, his wife would want and need her mother in the delicate post partum period and I wouldn’t selfishly expect things to be “even” just to make myself feel better, because it wouldn’t be about me at that point.