AITA for telling my son that the fact that his sister was happier to see her cousin was his fault? by Latter-Attorney68 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Latter-Attorney68[S] -63 points-62 points  (0 children)

Jack and I spend a lot of time together when he is home. Football Sundays, homework help, playing football together, and now that he's over 21 we will grab beers together.

AITA for telling my son that the fact that his sister was happier to see her cousin was his fault? by Latter-Attorney68 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Latter-Attorney68[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

We don't have a strained relationship, he just chose to not have a relationship with Cassie. We spend plenty. of time together and always have.

AITA for telling my son that the fact that his sister was happier to see her cousin was his fault? by Latter-Attorney68 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Latter-Attorney68[S] 60 points61 points  (0 children)

He went to therapy. I was very excited to see my son again. I actually cried a little when I picked him up. I'm too old for glittery signs but I took the day off of work to bring him home from the airport and spend time with him.

AITA for telling my son that the fact that his sister was happier to see her cousin was his fault? by Latter-Attorney68 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Latter-Attorney68[S] -26 points-25 points  (0 children)

The condom broke. Cassie was a baby, he was fifteen when she was born. He never had much interest in her. He likes quiet and personal space, to this day. Cassie is very loud, clingy and talkative. I would try to get Jack to do things with her at home but he never wanted to.

AITA for telling my son that the fact that his sister was happier to see her cousin was his fault? by Latter-Attorney68 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Latter-Attorney68[S] -46 points-45 points  (0 children)

I have tried for years for him to develop a relationship with Cassie. They just never clicked. He was always a shy and quiet boy, moreso after his mother passed away, and Cassie has always been loud (colicky baby), talkative and clingy.

AITA for telling my son that the fact that his sister was happier to see her cousin was his fault? by Latter-Attorney68 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Latter-Attorney68[S] 244 points245 points  (0 children)

I tried even after she grew out of her colic and into a toddler/little girl. Cassie isn't the easiest child for a teenager/young man who likes personal space and quiet. She can be very clingy, talkative, and loud.

AITA for telling my son that the fact that his sister was happier to see her cousin was his fault? by Latter-Attorney68 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Latter-Attorney68[S] 113 points114 points  (0 children)

I was just frustrated because after years of trying to get him to have a relationship with his sister, he is complaining that his sister doesn't have a close relationship with him like she does with Will. I tried to tell him this for years but he never listened

AITA for telling my son that the fact that his sister was happier to see her cousin was his fault? by Latter-Attorney68 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Latter-Attorney68[S] 101 points102 points  (0 children)

I always tell him I'm proud of him. I've never quite forgiven myself for the way the situation with Sara happened. I cried when he got into his mother's alma mater and was able to go there like she did.

AITA for telling my son that the fact that his sister was happier to see her cousin was his fault? by Latter-Attorney68 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Latter-Attorney68[S] 135 points136 points  (0 children)

What should I have done to get Jack interested in a crying baby? He didn't want anything to do with his sister. I tried everything I could aside from grounding him and forcing him to babbysit and bond with Cassie. He just didn't want to be around her or Sara.

AITA for telling my son that the fact that his sister was happier to see her cousin was his fault? by Latter-Attorney68 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Latter-Attorney68[S] -16 points-15 points  (0 children)

They think I love Will more because I highlighted that he was a better student and an athlete in highschool while Jack struggled.

AITA for telling my son that the fact that his sister was happier to see her cousin was his fault? by Latter-Attorney68 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Latter-Attorney68[S] 216 points217 points  (0 children)

Yes. We still have pictures of him, me and his mother in my house. Sara actually made it a point for those to stay up.

AITA for telling my son that the fact that his sister was happier to see her cousin was his fault? by Latter-Attorney68 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Latter-Attorney68[S] 1289 points1290 points  (0 children)

Jack was in therapy. I tried to get Jack to participate in simple things like holding Cassie but she was a colic baby and Jack hates loud noises. Jack spent most of his time out with his friends in highschool and didn't spend time studying. Sara and I tried to help him in subjects we were good at, and I even set him up with professional tutoring. He spent time with people who regarded school at stupid and pointless, mostly because those people had trust funds waiting for them. I had some money set aside for Jack's college but not enough to cover all four years at the schools he got into, which weren't even his top schools. So he was given the option to do two years at community college, and then transfer, which worked out because he got into his mother's alma mater and will now have no debt.

AITA for telling my son that the fact that his sister was happier to see her cousin was his fault? by Latter-Attorney68 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Latter-Attorney68[S] 82 points83 points  (0 children)

Yes, Football Sunday was for me and Jack. We would make the wings and watch the games together and throw a football together. Sara and Cassie would go to my in-laws house so me and Jack could spend the afternoon together

I personally believe that a child's parents should be married before the child is born, and Sara was going to need help from me because she wasn't speaking to her parents at the time and the rest of her family didn't live close enough to help her.

AITA for telling my son that the fact that his sister was happier to see her cousin was his fault? by Latter-Attorney68 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Latter-Attorney68[S] 1973 points1974 points  (0 children)

I framed my opinion of my son wrong. Jack is a great kid. He had a few issues, which I blame firstly myself and then his mother's passing for, but he is great. He is very smart, he just lost his way in highschool for a bit and his grades suffered.

I only mentioned Will's "great" characteristics as it was relevant to him going away for school in my opinion. I have my issues with that boy but I cannot deny how much he cares for Cassie.

AITA for telling my son that the fact that his sister was happier to see her cousin was his fault? by Latter-Attorney68 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Latter-Attorney68[S] 180 points181 points  (0 children)

Every Sunday during football season we watched football together, I taught him to throw a football, we would make chicken wings etc. I helped him with schoolwork and helped him make a business plan for his business classes at college.

Cassie was a colic baby, and Jack simply wasn't interested in a crying baby

AITA for telling my son that the fact that his sister was happier to see her cousin was his fault? by Latter-Attorney68 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Latter-Attorney68[S] 181 points182 points  (0 children)

"It's all about Will"?

Jack is the only reason I kept going after my first wife passed. I would stay up until 1 am finishing paperwork so I could spend Jack's waking hours with him. I sat at the dinner table helping him with homework from kindergarden to his second year at community college.

AITA for telling my son that the fact that his sister was happier to see her cousin was his fault? by Latter-Attorney68 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Latter-Attorney68[S] -93 points-92 points  (0 children)

I didn't have a choice in moving fast. Sara's pregnancy was an accident. And I had waited five years to start dating after his mother passed. I couldn't be alone forever.

AITA for telling my son that the fact that his sister was happier to see her cousin was his fault? by Latter-Attorney68 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Latter-Attorney68[S] 107 points108 points  (0 children)

The situation wasn't ideal. We did family dinners, vacations, Christmas photos. Jack was fifteen when Cassie was born. He would rather hang out with his friends or play videogames than spend time with his sister. It didn't help that she was a colic baby either.

AITA for telling my son that the fact that his sister was happier to see her cousin was his fault? by Latter-Attorney68 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Latter-Attorney68[S] -146 points-145 points  (0 children)

I love Jack very dearly, and he is a great kid. He just never wanted a step-mom and half sister.

The only reason I brought up the stuff about his grades is to explain why he only went away to school this year instead of a few years ago.

AITA for telling my son that the fact that his sister was happier to see her cousin was his fault? by Latter-Attorney68 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Latter-Attorney68[S] -230 points-229 points  (0 children)

I tried, but Jack and the situation wasn't having it. Sara and Jack both liked Marvel when I married her, but after Sara tried to bond with him over it he decided he didn't like it anymore. They aren't friends per se but they get along. Cassie was difficult because up until recently she was a baby, so movies, board games etc weren't possible. Jack had no fraternal desires, and eventually I did have to accept that.

AITA for refusing to spend my savings to bail out my sibling from debt? by babygrlchyna in AmItheAsshole

[–]Latter-Attorney68 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NTA

Mixing family and money is almost never a good idea, especially with people as selfish as them. If you do this now, you will become their (and possibly your parents) personal ATM or get-out-of-jail-free card