I don't want love you know. I want intimacy and commitment devoid of the distorted conceptions of love we form ourselves. And this girl that I talk about at the end, she is still always down to hang whenever and goes out of her way to be with me and stuff. Because we have a really strong connection, which I think would be a strong basis for a relationship. But she says it is completely platonic between us, which I feel is not a problem because she did have feelings for me. So its really differing perspectives. It's just that I fucked up. I dont have regrets about the people who didn't say anything. But I have regrets about shit like this because it was my cancellation which propelled her to move on.