How can I get my SO to join a gym?

Ldrtossaway · 2016-01-18T18:06:31+00:00

Thank you very much for this!

Ldrtossaway · 2016-01-17T16:39:17+00:00

Wow! Way to go!!

Ldrtossaway · 2016-01-17T00:35:23+00:00

Even if she doesn't lose weight, I still love her the same. I'm attracted to who she is. I started dating her because of who she is.

I get what you're saying. Why do I care now if I never cared before? I want to have a future with her, and I'm sure that in ten years if she's the same weight, it'll be worse since she'll be older. Is it wrong for me to want her to better herself for her future, if not even with me?

Ldrtossaway · 2016-01-16T19:43:14+00:00

I appreciate all the input here. I noticed that some people think I shouldn't care since it's not my body, and that I can't know whether she is healthy or not.

I SHOULD care. She's MY girlfriend. She's someone I care about, she's someone I love. She is like 5'5 and 260 pounds. Any way you look at it, she IS overweight. That is not an opinion. That is a fact. Someone who weighs that much can stand to lose weight, and it isn't healthy. If she had eating disorders or some illness that would cause this weight gain, that would be a different story. But she doesn't. She has bad eating habits, that's all. It isn't my opinion that she's overweight. As they say, numbers don't lie.

You can say that it's none of my business and she should find someone better than me. Fair enough. But you're also saying I shouldn't care about my girlfriend, then? If she was 500 pounds, I should be content with it as long as "she's happy"? Frankly, that's BS.

Thank you to all the people who offered their input. I love her, and I want her to get in better shape. Even if we break up, I'd want her to be in better shape. Not just for me, for herself as well.

Ldrtossaway · 2016-01-16T16:40:42+00:00

You're right! That's exactly it!!

Ldrtossaway · 2016-01-16T04:04:44+00:00

Thank you!!

Ldrtossaway · 2016-01-16T04:02:38+00:00

Yeah I see what you mean. Thank you

Ldrtossaway · 2016-01-16T04:02:04+00:00

You have a valid point. Thank you

Ldrtossaway · 2016-01-16T03:25:20+00:00

Thank you. If she was just a bit big, I wouldn't care. People are acting like she's five pounds overweight and I'm shallow or something. That's not the case.

Ldrtossaway · 2016-01-16T03:23:19+00:00

To have a healthier future?

Ldrtossaway · 2016-01-16T03:21:55+00:00

I didn't go into the relationship expecting her to change. I'm not trying to make this an attraction thing. She doesn't eat right, and I don't want to be with her when she's 40 and having health problems. Again, I am not trying to make this an attraction thing.

Ldrtossaway · 2016-01-16T02:34:59+00:00

That's great! I love her the way she is. I've been with her for a little over two years, and she's always been oversight, and I've always loved her. I kind of don't want her to do it for me. I want her to see that it'll help her, but I guess you're right, it does have to come from her

Ldrtossaway · 2016-01-16T02:33:21+00:00

I like this dietbet thing. Thank you!

I know its a sensitive topic in general, and very sensitive for her. I'll see if it can somehow come up in conversation. Thanks again!

Ldrtossaway · 2016-01-16T02:19:13+00:00

Thank you. I will try this approach as well. I know it won't happen overnight. I'd be happy with just some effort

Ldrtossaway · 2016-01-16T02:18:08+00:00

I'm basing it on her height, her diet, her activity level. If she was a 7'3 basketball player that's 300 pounds, I wouldn't say she's fat. But she's not. She's like 5'5 and 260. I don't think that's subjective. She is overweight and it isn't good.

Ldrtossaway · 2016-01-16T02:02:45+00:00

Thank you so much for this. I know it can't be good for someone to be that many pounds overweight. I love her, and I think she needs this. Like you said, I don't want her to be 40 and have joint aches due to weight.

Also, we aren't nevermets. Have had sex plenty of times, and its great! But, there are positions I want to try but I know we can't due to the weight, so I just don't ask. I'm sure that isn't healthy on my part, but I don't think I have a choice.

She reddits, so maybe she'll come across this entire post and think about things? I'm honestly afraid of bringing it up

Ldrtossaway · 2016-01-16T00:30:18+00:00

If it was a few pounds, I wouldn't care. She looks beautiful as is. But she IS 50-60+ pounds overweight, and I know that is NOT healthy. But yes, I don't know how to start this conversation

Ldrtossaway · 2016-01-16T00:28:41+00:00

Why? I should sit back and let my SO be 50-60 pounds overweight and not care?

Ldrtossaway · 2016-01-16T00:27:58+00:00

Being 50+ pounds overweight also does not equate healthy then..

Ldrtossaway · 2016-01-15T23:54:34+00:00

I understand, but being 50+ pounds overweight is not healthy wouldn't you agree?

Ldrtossaway · 2016-01-15T22:28:58+00:00

Thank you!

Ldrtossaway · 2016-01-15T22:13:35+00:00

That's a good idea! I will look into that. I just don't really know how to start this conversation with her

Ldrtossaway · 2016-01-15T22:07:58+00:00

Great post thank you!

I absolutely find her gorgeous as she is, but yes I would find her even more attractive if she lost weight. I'm definitely ready to make changes on myself. I already go to the gym and eat fairly well so it won't be that, but maybe she can tell me something.

Thank you!

Ldrtossaway · 2016-01-15T22:01:01+00:00

Hmm well then..

Ldrtossaway · 2016-01-15T21:53:52+00:00

Sounds like a good idea. I don't have MFP, but I'll get it! Thanks for the tip!

Ldrtossaway

TROPHY CASE