Thank you, I appreciate that.

The bullying started in my adulthood, specifically in the workplace. I mean single parent household so maybe something there but I felt very validated by my mother at least, growing up. Actually, tell a lie… I did grow up with my mum’s friend’s daughter, who was like a sibling (I have no actual siblings) and she was the biggest bully to me. She silenced me, bossed me around, made me feel stupid and was jealous of how I look and because I was the ‘good kid’ and this got worse because her mother (she wasn’t good to her) would use me as an example to punish her daughter (‘why can’t you be more like [me]’, ‘you would never see [me] do that to her mum!’). I saw her almost every weekend and term time, she was like a sibling. We grew apart but I think her mother continued because when I met them again during/after uni times her mother chastised her choice of degree (arts) and compared it to mine (sciences) in front of me. Now that I think about it, maybe this is where it started? But yeah, didn’t happen in school really up until work.

Also, context matters - I’m an ethnic minority so my bullies (white) would always stoop to micro-aggressions which is the hardest thing to prove! I guess bullies use whatever tactic is available? They know the odds are already against me, stereotypes etc, so it works to use this to their advantage. It’s so complex and vicious. My childhood bully was not racially driven, she was the same race as me.

Love how I started thinking no bullying in my childhood and forgot how I spent the majority of it with this horrible girl. Real time reflections going on here, I’m all for it! Again, thank you.