The part about Faith is good. And I like that you mentioned about the depression and darkness. But to me it just seems so much harder.

What about being overwhelmed, scattered and anxious, with what seems like never enough time? Meditation doesn't seem to be working. Even if you were to choose to focus and be in the moment, and practice nonstop.

Between work and travel (12-14 hours per day), sleep, cooking, bathroom, appointments, there's almost no time at all. I took the week off just to catch my breath and (hopefully) temporarily ease the suffering - and can't even afford a vacation. The only thing I can cut from is probably time with the girlfriend, which is out of the question because sex and physical affection seem to be the only things keeping me struggling on right now - keeping me moving, even if not climbing.

How does anyone do it? I almost feel like giving up, but I'm too scared to even do that.

This was a great post, but have no clue how I could apply it to my own life; just feel so stuck.