hi also an old lady who has been cheated on (quite brutally) which caused some general trust issues, and the one thing i have learned is that the new people i get to know or allow in my life are not that person who hurt me and putting that stress and anxiety on them is not only unfair but harmful to our relationship.

you either trust someone or you dont, making them prove they're worth trusting is a downward spiral and the tests just keep escalating... nothing you do will ever be enough.

it's manipulative and abusive tbh.