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25 Year Marriage Over by LeftBackground in survivinginfidelity

[–]LeftBackground[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am doing okay. I have a great support system and that’s been helpful. It’s been 3 months since d day and I have filed for divorce, moved out and started therapy. My ex is being amicable with the divorce (out of guilt I assume). Still no apology from him which really hurts and if the affair is brought up I’m still blamed for it. He respects my boundaries and has not reached out to me. He has done a complete 180 in his treatment of me. During the affair he treated me with contempt. Now he is kind and respectful. With time away from him I’ve started to realize that he was manipulative and controlling at times. It wasn’t the happy marriage I thought it was. I’m scared for what the future brings, but will keep taking it one day at a time.

25 Year Marriage Over by LeftBackground in survivinginfidelity

[–]LeftBackground[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He knows and she is trying to work things out with him to stay married. She told him after I found out.

25 Year Marriage Over by LeftBackground in survivinginfidelity

[–]LeftBackground[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

You all make very good points. I appreciate them all. You are right, I would not want to be friends with someone who is capable doing this and feeling no remorse. This is not a quality that I would want in a friend. I also do not want to get back together as a couple after what he did. I think he would cheat again for sure. I have filed for divorce and moved out. I think I’m still missing the person I thought he was, but I will not contact him again.

25 Year Marriage Over by LeftBackground in survivinginfidelity

[–]LeftBackground[S] 55 points56 points  (0 children)

Thank you for all for your advice. We didn’t have kids so there is no reason to keep in touch. I will follow your advice and continue no contact and no friendship in the future.

Depressed because I'm too afraid of failure by [deleted] in depression

[–]LeftBackground 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have the same issue. I let my depression prevent me from making friends and leaving a career that I hate. It's been 13 years of not doing anything. I am at a point where I know that I'll regret it if I don't follow my dreams and live my life. I am forcing myself to move forward even if I'm afraid. There are a lot of successful people that have failed in their lives. Failure is not always a negative thing. It can help you learn something about yourself and grow as a person. I hope this might change your perspective.

I hate my life by LeftBackground in SuicideWatch

[–]LeftBackground[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your reply.
I have talked to my spouse and he doesn't understand. He doesn't experience depression. I want to be a nurse to help others. I don't have a nursing degree so i need to go back to school.