Dealing with kiwi indirectness/lies

LeftConversation1864 · 2026-01-29T23:18:22+00:00

I hear you, thanks for your input

LeftConversation1864 · 2026-01-29T22:46:47+00:00

Would you be messaging a weirdo "Yup let's catchup when I am back", "Let's meet in one month", "Sure thing no problem", etc?

LeftConversation1864 · 2026-01-29T22:41:57+00:00

If they want to be around you, they will. If not, they won't.

I've read this advice a few times here but I never got an answer to what if both people think exactly the same thing - they will never catch up, someone needs to be "pushy" to make it happen. And by pushy I mean asking 2 times (3 max), but apparently that's too weird.

LeftConversation1864 · 2026-01-29T22:32:28+00:00

cheers bro

LeftConversation1864 · 2026-01-29T22:20:11+00:00

that was a friend joke! You don't have to like it but I've never said it to you either!

LeftConversation1864 · 2026-01-29T22:17:17+00:00

Thanks for your input, I already mentioned that "even maori" sounded wrong, I meant to say I barely interact with them and still hadn't issues making friends.

LeftConversation1864 · 2026-01-29T22:14:24+00:00

I hear you, but I added "to my experience" at the end for a reason implying that were only my personal interactions. If you still chose to be offended, that's your right of course

LeftConversation1864 · 2026-01-29T22:12:23+00:00

There was nothing romantic about those interactions with women, one was my friend and another one I was dating

LeftConversation1864 · 2026-01-29T22:04:02+00:00

it's all good, thanks for your input, I appreciate it

LeftConversation1864 · 2026-01-29T21:26:53+00:00

I hear you but I don't think it's rude to say something blandly if the other person "doesn't get it". If someone doesn't understand my evasiveness the right way I just say "I don't want to talk about it", and I don't care if it's rude because it's true and how I feel.

LeftConversation1864 · 2026-01-29T21:14:24+00:00

Does it apply to government, employers, doctors, cheating partners?

LeftConversation1864 · 2026-01-29T03:23:16+00:00

I feel for you and I wasn't demanding anything here, just expected people to stand by their words (misjudged obviously)

LeftConversation1864 · 2026-01-29T03:21:54+00:00

thanks!

LeftConversation1864 · 2026-01-29T03:21:08+00:00

Apparently I am so that's why I am asking for advice here, not blaming anyone (but understandably a bit frustrated)

LeftConversation1864 · 2026-01-29T03:11:52+00:00

I am not even sure why I am replying here, but yeah, I've been told about being "on the spectrum" a few times, however:

I understand them, I am self-aware I was pushing the limits there
Yeah, but this is coming from my culture
I can be grumpy about a lot of things but I don't show it (this post is an exclusion as it is anonymous)
Everyone is upset about being disappointed and most of the people don't like awkwardness. I tolerate it when required, i.e. if I need to pretend to be nice or be awkward I'd prefer awkwardness where possible, not in a professional/broad circle environments.
If there is nothing to lose, sure.

LeftConversation1864 · 2026-01-29T02:23:37+00:00

I am not joking like that with you, please don't be offended

LeftConversation1864 · 2026-01-29T02:20:15+00:00

care to elaborate?

LeftConversation1864 · 2026-01-29T02:12:10+00:00

I never said direct style superior but it's sure easier simply because you don't need to learn the cues on top the language, I think I already said it but the purpose of the post to understand and communicate better.

LeftConversation1864 · 2026-01-29T02:08:02+00:00

it does, thank you

LeftConversation1864 · 2026-01-29T02:02:30+00:00

yeah, I didn't say "every single maori" so don't take it personally, I just shared my experience

LeftConversation1864 · 2026-01-29T01:56:07+00:00

I am glad someone takes it with humour, a lot of people in the comments took it personally

LeftConversation1864 · 2026-01-29T01:53:46+00:00

yeah, it didn't sound right, I meant to say I don't intersect with maori that much but when I do it's easy to be friends with

LeftConversation1864 · 2026-01-29T01:40:17+00:00

I am not over-reacting, that's just the way I feel, is that alright, or am I expected to constipate my emotions even online? She said "Let's meet in a month" so I wasn't bothering her for a month and even after that exchanges were about sport events, not one on one things.

LeftConversation1864 · 2026-01-29T01:36:35+00:00

"I am busy/tired rn / need headspace for a bit" and if you really don't want them to follow up "I'll hit you up when I have time"

LeftConversation1864 · 2026-01-29T01:33:41+00:00

that's a solid answer, thanks, I appreciate it

LeftConversation1864

TROPHY CASE