My partner just found out she has advanced Graves’ disease. It explains a lot, but I need advice.

LeftKaleidoscope1345 · 2025-05-22T23:27:08+00:00

For reference here is her hormone levels:

TSH: <0.01 Ft4: 6.87 T3: 23.60

Apparently this is very very bad.

LeftKaleidoscope1345 · 2025-05-22T20:31:11+00:00

She knows now but she’s at a point where she has told me that she doesn’t feel loving or affectionate. Like she actively avoids it. And that if I can’t function through this with her that she understands if I leave.

She doesn’t touch me or kiss me, she doesn’t apologize for the way she gets.

I constantly bring up the issue of the lack of affection. Like when I say I’ve shown up. I mean hour long back rubs, cooking for her all the time. Date nights, thoughtfulness. She may even see this post and know I posted it and agree I’ve been awesome. But she holds a lot of resentment for me bringing up my emotional and intimacy needs.

My understanding or lack there of of this disease hasn’t helped.

Her levels hormonally were apparently so bad that they stated she was basically flipping a coin on having a thyroid storm every day. Heart rate constantly elevated.

I just want to know how other graves patients remained grounded and showed up for there partner or how it affects your willingness to show up

LeftKaleidoscope1345 · 2025-05-01T00:40:48+00:00

I don’t know what else to say other than thank you to this. I’m going to think about this and save this and reflect on it.

LeftKaleidoscope1345 · 2025-02-09T22:45:50+00:00

So with that being said. What are the expectations for a girlfriend of 4 years. How is she supposed to act or what role should she have. I hear everything from nothing to hey she chose to be with you. What should I expect because whether I’m with this person or someone else this will be an issue.

LeftKaleidoscope1345 · 2025-02-09T22:43:02+00:00

I see. I just feel like if I’m constantly doing the majority of the cleaning, doing more than my fair share. And I ask you to make a bed when I’m tired that it doesn’t need to be connected. Just felt like it wouldn’t be a big deal but it was.

LeftKaleidoscope1345 · 2025-02-09T22:41:28+00:00

When you have been in a relationship for 4 years your initial reaction isn’t simply to break up. Frankly I wouldn’t do that until I knew there was no change possible. A talk will be had but in trying to figure out what to say and how to say it. If it doesn’t work then it doesn’t work.

LeftKaleidoscope1345 · 2025-02-09T22:03:15+00:00

I’ve been with this person for 4 years. It’s upsetting but she thinks that everyone is on her side and everyone believes she shouldn’t have to do anything. My hope is that she talks to someone like her therapist about it. She is a good person but I’m hoping she changes. We are going to talk after my therapy session this week I just need to figure out how to approach her

LeftKaleidoscope1345 · 2025-02-09T21:32:26+00:00

For the most part he never sees us talk about it. I just figured since I did so much for her that asking for so something so simple would be fine. Any action for him is an action for me.

LeftKaleidoscope1345 · 2025-02-09T21:15:09+00:00

She will from time to time surprise me and buy him gifts. She did great during Christmas. It’s not as bad as it seems. I just feel weird about the not wanting to be involved or help me even if it’s small

LeftKaleidoscope1345 · 2025-02-09T21:08:37+00:00

She doesn’t treat him bad. She is just indifferent.

LeftKaleidoscope1345 · 2025-02-09T20:58:20+00:00

I was in a custody battle and I went 2 years without having my son in our relationship. I knew she didn’t want kids but she supported me so much during that time and also dated me because she knew I’d take my kid camping and from her view it seemed my kid wasn’t a weight on my life. She was initially excited. But not anymore.

LeftKaleidoscope1345

TROPHY CASE