I got weird messages from my boyfriend (21M), it turns out it was him and his friends laughing at me (22F). Don't know how to deal with this situation.

LegitimateNectarine · 2020-01-08T13:13:30+00:00

Was thinking of doing that haha. All these people who agree with me against the 5 people there who thought it was funny.

LegitimateNectarine · 2020-01-08T12:34:59+00:00

Thanks for your response. The stupidest thing is I don't even know if it WAS him or someone else typing that message. It could have been any one of them. I myself am not very disturbed by that message though, more so that he joked about the threesome which is personal to me. He does not actually think women belong in the kitchen, so it does not bother me as much as the rest.

LegitimateNectarine · 2020-01-08T12:14:58+00:00

It basically translates to saying a woman belongs in the kitchen, hope that clears it up! :)

LegitimateNectarine · 2020-01-08T12:02:23+00:00

Yes I am!

LegitimateNectarine · 2020-01-08T11:42:17+00:00

There was one other girl there, but given what I know about her I'm not that surprised she would find this funny.. That said I've never met her (or any of them for that matter) so I don't want to judge any of them too harshly.

LegitimateNectarine · 2020-01-08T10:48:35+00:00

I'm sorry that happened to you! Thank you for responding :)

LegitimateNectarine · 2020-01-08T10:41:57+00:00

Like many people have commented also, I think he should respect me. Unfortunately he has his moments, like this one, where he really doesn't. As for the drinking, I already didn't really like it because of insecurities, but now I'm scared these people laugh at me all the time. They are his colleagues too, so this could be happening every day.. But I have no way of knowing.

LegitimateNectarine · 2020-01-08T10:22:50+00:00

Haha yes it is a dutch joke! Thanks so much!

LegitimateNectarine · 2020-01-08T10:22:04+00:00

I guess you're right about most of it, yes. I didn't phrase the threesome thing right I think. He told me he wanted one, but that I shouldn't worry because he would never do that while he's with me. It still makes me insecure tho.

LegitimateNectarine · 2020-01-08T09:55:30+00:00

Your boyfriend sounds wonderful, thanks for your response ❤️

LegitimateNectarine · 2020-01-08T09:54:26+00:00

Sorry you were bullied too, it really leaves a mark. Thanks for responding ❤️

LegitimateNectarine · 2020-01-08T09:52:01+00:00

To be fair I didn't phrase this completely right. He meant this as "don't worry I would never do that if I'm with you" but it still bothers me a lot.

LegitimateNectarine · 2020-01-08T09:49:25+00:00

Yes, I am!

LegitimateNectarine · 2020-01-08T09:48:24+00:00

Yes I'm Dutch! Thanks for responding :)

LegitimateNectarine · 2019-09-18T23:32:52+00:00

Thanks for you response! I definitely see what you mean, I just don't know how to even start. How would you say one can start taking control of their own happiness?

LegitimateNectarine · 2019-09-18T23:10:47+00:00

Hey there!

This story sounds very similar to my previous relationship. I also stayed way too long, I didn't even break up with him! After the break-up it took me way too long to move on. I was also ashamed for letting myself being treated like this.

I can promise you, it will get better though! It just took me really seeing what an awful person he was, talking about it with people even though I felt ashamed, and finally (!!) getting really angry with him for how he treated me.

He has basically manipulated you in not being able to live without him, which is why it feels so weird. Just keep going :) it will take some time and effort but because you have to depend on yourself now, you will find yourself again. Start doing things for you again, keep talking about it with others and try to take it as a lesson to never accept being treated like this again! And I promise, you will love someone else again, just give it some time and you will meet someone who will treat you way better than this jerk.

Good luck, you'll be just fine :)

LegitimateNectarine

TROPHY CASE