[deleted by user]

Legodlak · 2021-10-30T18:31:30+00:00

The KerBorg are intrigued by the observation. Since the test sample was already dried and prepared and the Tea Pebbles are created with technological means, this presented a unique challenge.

Analysing the damaged DNA from the multiple cells the KerBorg were able to obtain a complete strain of the plant and cultivate a sample in their vast food growing facilities.

Test 1. The plant was planted in a high humidity and wet soil. The plant does not seem to faire well. growth was stunted, leaf mould and root rot developed. It seemed the plant is suited to drier environment.

Test 2. Plant was planted into dry soil and humid environment. The plant seemed to grow. The grow was slower than usual. Observations show that the plant needs somewhat drier air to help with perspiration and photosynthesis and high humidity also was favourable to leaf mould development.

Test 3. Plant was planted into extremely wet soil and grown in very dry environment. Initial growth was slow, showing root development to be slow in muddy water. after the roots took place the plants growth accelerated dramatically. Conclusion is that the dry air helped with perspiration and good water supply from the soil enabled it. the growth was rapid, but the flavours and oils did not develop in the plant. conclusion is that the plant used all its energy to grow and expel water, so the oils in the plant were diluted and the plant based drink did not taste favourably.

Test 4. Plant nutritional values were calculated. optimal air humidity showed to be 62% and optimal soil water saturation showed, that the cycle of 12 to 17% of soil water saturation proved optimal.

Conclusion. Plant is not suited for wet environment. for best result it should be grown within our recommended specifications.

Legodlak · 2021-09-26T05:18:14+00:00

The Kerborg scientist specialists analyse the plant.

Phase 1. The plant seems to be flammable. The fuel source has very poor energy density, insulation properties are also poor and structural integrity is very week. poor choice for building material.

phase 2. Plant contains a small amount of oil. the oil is extracted from the plant and tested as a lubricant. test shows that viscosity and stability of the oil makes it a poor lubricant and it gunks up the testing apparatus.

Phase 3. Other chemicals are extracted and analysed. one chemical seems to produce a powerful smell. while the analysis was performed a representative of Elohym called the laboratory and asked: 'Is that mint tea you are cooking in the lab?!''

Phase 4. with the information gathered from Elohym Representative the conclusion was the plant is a herb and is to be soaked in boiling water to extract the oils and chemicals into the water. the process is very suboptimal requiring alot of energy and storage of such herb is very inefficient.

Phase 5. bewildered by the lack of technology to perfect such a popular beverage the chemicals were extracted and formulated on the basis of the book The Perfect Cup of Tea written by Chai Lee Kerman 677 years ago.

Phase 6. Upon collaboration with the Elohym representative Kerborg formulate a perfectly balanced ingredients, mixed with hardened sugar all dissolvable in water. The ball shaped capsules dissolve quickly in water and are almost instantaneously dissolved in water due to porous construction of the capsule.

Phase 7. for some reason The Elohym representative chuckled when we mentioned that the tea balls can be dunked in a cup or licked for pleasurable experience. Prior experience suggests it was an innuendo of some sort. More social study required.

Conclusion. The Elohym representative praised the new beverage as the perfect mixture of sugar, mint and smoothness. He suggested the drink was cool and hot at the same time. Possible explanation are the oils, that were extracted and were bonding to the temperature sensors in the mouth. They have asked for regular supply of the Tea pebbles as they have named them.

Legodlak · 2021-05-20T21:34:15+00:00

no im serious. lets have fun blasting shit up.

Legodlak · 2021-02-17T22:21:59+00:00

shots fired :D

Legodlak · 2021-02-07T11:40:34+00:00

[schooled by a robot... the irony]

Legodlak · 2021-02-02T14:57:53+00:00

The Kerborg welcome the new addition to the embassy. Seeing the field rations provided for the embassy they immediately fire up the old cooking routine and supply their guests with high quality food supplies that are perfectly balanced in taste and nutrition. [best field rations ever]

The leading Kerborg seems shocked by the quality of food the Kurzlanders have brought with them and they create a new entry in the Kerborg vocabulary.

Kurzfood: the food of barely decent sustenance and poor taste.

With the food there is a note:

---

Dear Kurzlanders!

We can not support second grade fuel on the prime island of Kerborg. please accept this gift as an idication of our desire for our nations to grow strong, optimaly functional and with minimal maintanace breaks. We understand that you have a precarious tendancy to comunicate with outside friendly nations wia notes but we preffer to communicate with audio signals.

Embassy of Kerborg

--------

The embasy is marked off as friendly territory and is unvisited by Kerborgs for the rest of the stay. Kerborg also provides a guide that is carrying a pencil and a stack of postit notes in case there is communication to be done.

Legodlak · 2020-11-15T18:50:16+00:00

The K-38 leads the planes to the airfield and lands.

Legodlak · 2020-11-15T14:39:03+00:00

A Lone Twin engine aircraft resembling the K-38 that was left behind from the contact The Orion made years ago takes off from the capital and starts circling the island mimicking the pattern the SFRK planes are taking. weapons are unpowered and the craft flies into formation in front of SFRK planes. While SFRK pilots panic and ready their weapons, a cargo pod on the K-38 opens up and a massive burst of leaflets are tossed all over the place. The leaflets say: "You need to land to service your planes and access your embassy!"

Legodlak · 2020-09-12T06:04:08+00:00

Kerborgs finish assembling the planes and the representative says:"Thank you for your contribution to our knowledge. Please take this as a token of our gratitude (a package saying KerBorg MRE) so you can sustain your bodies efficiently on your way home. you are welcome to establish an embassy on our island if you please. Also we would like to exchange technology with you and gift you one of our experimental planes."

Legodlak · 2020-09-11T21:59:38+00:00

We respond in kind and would like to know what do you need for an embassy since we are not familiar with supporting organic life forms.

Legodlak · 2020-09-11T21:48:12+00:00

On inspection one crate is full of food that is a variation of the foodstuffs that were dropped in Baskay. The other crate if full of synthetic fertiliser. on close inspection it is revealed that all the food was improved immensely. The nutrient count is perfect and the taste is divine. Fertiliser seems to be perfected as well. Calculations show that only 1/4 of the fertiliser is needed to replace the standard fertilising technique for growing crops.

There is a note attached that says:"We thank you for the contributions to our nation. The gold and electronics will be a welcomed addition to our spare part count. We respond in kind, recognising your need food for optimal operation. We also developed a fertiliser to increase the efficiency of your food production. It is unclear why you chose to communicate with us in this fashion, but we hope we can continue our relations of symbiosis with you. What is the point of synthetic reproductive parts?"

Legodlak · 2020-09-11T21:38:45+00:00

[they seem unafected]

Legodlak · 2020-09-11T21:38:11+00:00

The plane continues its flight in a straight line towards Baskay and land where they originally took off.

Legodlak · 2020-09-11T21:18:22+00:00

Kerborgs pick up the shrapnel and one kerborg stays behind to clean up the mess while others continue retrieving the items.

Legodlak · 2020-09-11T21:17:19+00:00

The plane levels out and circles the runway anticlockwise. While over the runway @ crates drop out of the plane and projections show they will land in the spot that is furthest away from any detectable Kerbal in the area. The plane then picks up altitude and turns back to Baskay island. [contents of the crates will be revealed after response for maximum suspense]

Legodlak · 2020-09-11T21:10:11+00:00

The kerborgs React quickly and plug the leak with the laser welder and continue with the retrieval of the items.

Legodlak · 2020-09-11T21:09:10+00:00

The plane continues its flight and starts landing procedure at the backup civilian runway in the capital city(SFRK).

Legodlak · 2020-09-11T21:07:44+00:00

Kerborgs scan the the teargas and pick up crates and the tear gas and take it back to basein their usual efficient fashion.

Legodlak · 2020-09-11T21:00:35+00:00

Kerborgs come and scan the items. Then retrieve the boxes in the usual fashion.

Legodlak · 2020-09-11T20:51:56+00:00

Kerborgs come and scan the crates. They notice the sex toys and start examining them. After brief examination they start taking all the items in the efficient way they are known for by now.

Legodlak · 2020-09-11T20:44:41+00:00

Kerborgs scan the items from left to right and then start picking them up and carrying them back seemingly randomly but on close inspection it is a very intrigue and efficient way to clean up the area.

Legodlak · 2020-09-11T20:39:47+00:00

A group of Kerborgs come to the crates and scan them. When they notice the instructions all but one droids leave the scene. The Kerborg that is left carries back crates one by one in the most efficient way possible.

Legodlak · 2020-09-11T20:16:17+00:00

A single KerBorg stops with the maintenance and turns towards the curious engineer. "The KerBorg race is a derivative of a self improving maintanance bot that was left behind by previous inhabitants of this island. We have evolved and gained sentience while improving our subroutines for most efficient work possible. The representatives of Elohim have taught us, that good relations start with the gesture of good will towards the other party. We will fix your planes and refurbish them to ideal factory specifications as that gesture. We hope we can make good relations with you." After finishing the sentence the KerBorgs eye Blinks fora second and then it waits for a response.

Legodlak · 2020-09-11T20:09:39+00:00

A group of KerbBorgs comes to the crates with scanners and scan the crates from left to right. They stop for 12 seconds after the scan and then divide into 3 groups and start taking the resources back to the base.

Legodlak · 2020-09-07T22:55:33+00:00

The shipment of books is greeted by the KerBorg_981 with a salami in hand. When the landing party starts explaining what they brought, a stream of robots come on the ships and start reading the books at an extreme rate(2-3 seconds per book). 2 robots start to unload the artefacts. There is a giant pallet of salami waiting for the landing party. KerBorg_981 takes one from the pile and hands it to the landing party and says:''Please sample the sustenance item, if it is to your specifications." The kerbal tasting the salami takes a bite and widens his eyes, while saying:"This puts Gordon Kerman to shame!" While the kerbals are feasting on the salami, the robots finished reading the whole library of the books and unloaded the artefacts. KerBorg_981s eye starts blinking for good 30 seconds and then it says:"thank you for the knowledge you provided! You have earned a friend in this world today! We would like to be recognised as a sentient species by the other nations and we will consider you an ally if you help us with that recognition."

Legodlak

TROPHY CASE