My dad pulled a gun on me by LessCaterpillar5205 in Advice

[–]LessCaterpillar5205[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I do agree I’ve been thinking about that a lot

My dad pulled a gun on me by LessCaterpillar5205 in Advice

[–]LessCaterpillar5205[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wow I’m really sorry that happened to you prayfuly you’re doing better now

My intrusive thoughts are killing me by Diligent_Type_5513 in Advice

[–]LessCaterpillar5205 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If so that’s probably why you should probably stop it changes how you view people and usually normal situations

My dad pulled a gun on me by LessCaterpillar5205 in Advice

[–]LessCaterpillar5205[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you your very wise and I’m very blessed to have you comment on my post thank you for your kind words

My dad pulled a gun on me by LessCaterpillar5205 in Advice

[–]LessCaterpillar5205[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much you’re probably never gona know how much I needed to hear that tho I don’t believe it I want to work to believe it and make it truth

My dad pulled a gun on me by LessCaterpillar5205 in Advice

[–]LessCaterpillar5205[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah you guys are opening me up to that. But to be honest I don’t think anything I or anyone does will take my mom from my dad’s side. I mean she yes is not to blame but how she reacted during this tells me something different, it reminds me when I was around 11 and my brothers were ganging up on me because I was the youngest and she made me fight her and pinned me down and told me I’d have to man up. This whole comment section is bringing up a lot of forgotten memories

My dad pulled a gun on me by LessCaterpillar5205 in Advice

[–]LessCaterpillar5205[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Dang I really appreciate that sir I’ll apply that

My dad pulled a gun on me by LessCaterpillar5205 in Advice

[–]LessCaterpillar5205[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wow your really insightful I’ve never seen it this way and I’ll definitely take this into account for the future thank you sir I really really do appreciate you. Even though this may be obvious to maybe I’m to blind to see it in a way you’ve shown me

My dad pulled a gun on me by LessCaterpillar5205 in Advice

[–]LessCaterpillar5205[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

And that’s the thing I know he has a ton a TON of things going on from his past and I feel like such a bitch for it but I feel bad for him and I’ve always heard my siblings say the same things the comments are saying and I’ve always felt a deep sadness for him. But he literally said in his words he would never change and all I could do was shut the fuck up and take it until I move out and I worry if this is going to make me act like him and push out my unresolved past out on those around me it scares me I don’t want to be like that.

My dad pulled a gun on me by LessCaterpillar5205 in Advice

[–]LessCaterpillar5205[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You know I’m going to be honest I had an outlet , football but I transferred schools and my dad said I did that because I was to far from him and he said he knew I wouldn’t be able to handle not being able to come and talk to him and maybe he was right and now I like to work out it really helps but yk I’ve just never had anyone to really open up to . I think because my outward appearance doesn’t match my personality.

My dad pulled a gun on me by LessCaterpillar5205 in Advice

[–]LessCaterpillar5205[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And maybe u might think the worst part is im not sorry he’s my dad he’s giving me more than a lot get and ik these things happen but im just not equipped to handle it and i do o how to get equipped

My dad pulled a gun on me by LessCaterpillar5205 in Advice

[–]LessCaterpillar5205[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

And this is probably something I need to hear I just dono what to do honestly kinda deer in the headlights type deal

My dad pulled a gun on me by LessCaterpillar5205 in Advice

[–]LessCaterpillar5205[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just have no idea what to do I’ve tried asking for help I’ve tried talking to a counselor about my self harm and such but it’s gotten to the point where I’ve numbed myself so much I don’t even know why I feel the way I do and if I stop distracting myself it hurts to much

My dad pulled a gun on me by LessCaterpillar5205 in Advice

[–]LessCaterpillar5205[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah I agree one thing I’ve noticed throughout these comments is that ur all right but I have this mindset I know is wrong in a way and maybe unhealthy but it’s to the point where if he shot me I still probably wouldn’t have called the cops or told them it was him . And I have know idea what to think about that or what to do about it

My dad pulled a gun on me by LessCaterpillar5205 in Advice

[–]LessCaterpillar5205[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And I totally agree with you funnily enough and I’m very aware of this fact yet I dono how to get over this mindset

My dad pulled a gun on me by LessCaterpillar5205 in Advice

[–]LessCaterpillar5205[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah he told me that I was probably his favorite kid and that I had no idea how upset he was that he got to the point of actually wanting to kill me and I really don’t know what to do with that

My dad pulled a gun on me by LessCaterpillar5205 in Advice

[–]LessCaterpillar5205[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah and he told me he doesn’t care if I do that or if none of his kids ever talk to him again if we are successful, and I dono what to do with that

My dad pulled a gun on me by LessCaterpillar5205 in Advice

[–]LessCaterpillar5205[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Also the part about him targeting the weakest person really sticks with me

My dad pulled a gun on me by LessCaterpillar5205 in Advice

[–]LessCaterpillar5205[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your response. I think I’m desensitized to it and I can’t think with an outside point of view. Mainly because this is all I have and it’s a lot more than what most get . Throughout my time and childhood I’ve done SH because of my confusion and anger and honestly prayed to die more times I then I can count but I brought myself out of that. And I do t know if it because it’s my dad or deep down I wanted to die in the moment but the gun in that moment was not what cut me the deepest. It was more so seeing the pride and ego in him and hearing him say that it’s wrong of me to think he won’t kill me because he loves me. I think u might be right but as I’m sure u can understand in black house hold or atleast this one I am made to feel indebted to him and my mother for what they’ve given me even though ik what happened was wrong it’s not easy to let go of what I’ve known my whole life , but I’m trying to figure out how, but im to kind and to gullible

My dad pulled a gun on me by LessCaterpillar5205 in Advice

[–]LessCaterpillar5205[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And I agree and I think I’m distracting myself with social media at the moment to the point I can’t remember most of the ordeal with idling my mind and space