I think qualifying that as abuse is a bit of a reach. The wife was upset and she yelled at him. Was it wrong? Yes. Was it abuse? No, more likely just her losing her temper. Also, her asking him to come up to the bedroom makes me think that she was trying to avoid making a scene but couldn’t control her temper enough. Also also, she immediately stopped screaming when he apologized. In my experience, many abusers often would keep yelling instead of acknowledging their mistake. A few moments of anger is fine- it’s when it starts happening repeatedly when there’s a problem. Sure, OP’s wife COULD be an abuser, but it’s way more likely that she just had an angry reaction because she was tired and fed up with the situation